Maddy bit her lip, glancing from Thomas to the nurse and back again. "Let me go and find out what's up," she said at last, hugging Thomas. "I'll see why he asked for me."
She followed the nurse into Jamie's room, finding him dozing again. Her heart squeezed as she saw him lying there on the sheets. Her family really needed to stop ending up in the hospital, it would make her feel a lot better.
"You can be amazing, you can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug," Maddy sang softly, brushing some of Jamie's hair out of his face. He was sleeping, whether because of honest exhaustion or the drugs they had him on, she wasn't sure. But his eyes fluttered open as she touched his forehead, and she winced internally. "Sorry, kiddo, I didn't mean to wake you."
"'S OK," he mumbled, blinking and yawning as he became more aware. "Wasn't very restful anyway."
Maddy swallowed hard, running one hand over his shoulder, almost unconsciously. "I'm so sorry, Jamie. I am so sorry this happened to you. How are you feeling? What happened? And, the pressing question on your dad's mind: why ask to see me and not him?"
Jamie opened his mouth. Then closed it again. "I couldn't face him right now," he mumbled at last. "I don't think I could even stand to hear him talk."
Maddy's heart flipped. "You sound a lot like me...back when I ended up here in the summer."
"You asked how I was feeling," he said. "And I just...I wouldn't even know how to explain it, and I'd think I was going crazy, because people can't just shapechange, this isn't a fucking movie. I can't even begin to explain how I feel to myself, because nothing prepares you for something like this."
"Can I take a guess how you feel?" she asked. He nodded.
"You feel betrayed," she said. "Down to your bones, down to your soul, because your eyes told your brain that the people you loved most had a hand in your breaking. And they promised, they fucking promised to always look out for you. They promised they'd never hurt you, and it's so fucking hard to reconcile that with what happened to you, with what you saw and heard." She picked up one of his hands and squeezed it. "But you have to know, kiddo. None of what they said was true. You hear me? None of it. Those...things, they prey on your worst fears, the things you think to yourself in the wee hours of the night when you can't sleep. And they get off on tearing you down."
Jamie had started to cry silently, tears slipping down his cheeks as she spoke. Every word she was saying made sense, it was like she was in his head. And that thought should scare him to death, but right now, it was just comforting to know that someone did truly understand what he'd gone through.
"They used Dad," he said at last. "That was their favorite mask to wear, probably because it hurt the most."
Maddy nodded, squeezing his hand again. "They do that," she replied. "The people we love the most turn into their most powerful weapons. It's such a cruel way to hurt someone, and that's what makes it so effective."