_reedrichards (_reedrichards) wrote in na_electronics, @ 2012-06-28 21:03:00 |
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Entry tags: | human torch ii, invisible woman, iron man, mr. fantastic |
Who: Reed Richards, Johnny Storm, Sue Richards
NPCS: Ben Grimm
What: Reed and Johnny put their Fantasti-Go-Kart to the test. Or rather, Ben puts their Fantasti-Go-Kart to the test... and he’s not sure he’ll ever forgive them.
Where: Poughkeepsie Speedway, just outside of Poughkeepsie, NY
When: Wednesday, June 27th (backdated)
Streaming video posted to both YouTube and the Fantastic Four's website. Text transcript as follows:
------TRANSCRIPT------
HERBIE: The recording and transcription are online, Dr. Richards.
DR. RICHARDS: Thank you, HERBIE.
BENJAMIN: Hey Stretch, you sure you got this Go-Kart in my size?
DR. RICHARDS: Of course, Ben. I had Johnny build it specifically with you in mind.
BENJAMIN: That explains a lot. THE OTHER DR. RICHARDS: SUSAN: Did you build in eject seat or some other fail-safe for him? ... Don’t give me that look. With you two, nothing is ever ‘just a Go-Kart’. I’m looking out for Ben’s well-being. What else does it do?
BENJAMIN: Thanks, Susie. And, uh, what she said.
JONATHAN: No ejector seat. It's a go-kart. A very, very, very--
BENJAMIN: Watch it, squirt.
JONATHAN: --extremely, ginormus, go-kart, but it's still just a go-kart. It does normal go-karty things. Right, HERBIE?
HERBIE: Right! The Fantasti-kart is an open kart with an offset chassis. It has a centrifugal clutch, slick tires provided by Vega, and a proprietary power source invented by Dr. Richards himself!
DR. RICHARDS: Thank you, HERBIE. The Go-Kart itself is perfectly safe, Ben, Susan. It’s the power source that we’re here to test.
BENJAMIN: It’s not that I don’t trust your math or nothing, Stretch, but if this thing’s so safe- why am I the one taking it on its maiden voyage?
DR. RICHARDS: Ah! I’m glad you asked. You see, for the final design of the Fantasti-car; in order to achieve flight at all (not to mention VTOL), we’re going to need to overcome a very significant weight issue--
BENJAMIN: So let’s put the heaviest guy in it, is that it?
DR. RICHARDS: Why, yes.
BENJAMIN: Reed, give me one good reason why I should let you and Matchstick strap me into this thing and set it off like a roman candle.
JONATHAN: People enjoy fireworks.
DR. RICHARDS: You’re the best pilot I know, Ben. If anyone can make this work, I firmly believe it’s you. It doesn’t hurt that you’re also theoretically indestructible. Hm... I’m sorry, that was two reasons.
SUSAN: Reed! He’s your best friend; not Buster, the crash test dummy!
BENJAMIN: … Well they’re not good but they’re reasons.
DR. RICHARDS: Thank you, Ben. Here’s your helmet.
BENJAMIN: Wait-- what’d you mean ‘theoretically’?
JONATHAN: Stop acting like a big baby. You'll be fine.
SUSAN: [hissed] Johnny! [smacks him lightly on the left side, then resumes normal speaking volume] You’ll be fine, Ben. If you aren’t, these two will have hell to pay.
DR. RICHARDS: Is everyone ready? Susan, how are you feeling?
SUSAN: I’m doing OK, Reed. Really.
BENJAMIN: What’d he mean ‘theoretically’?!
HERBIE: Theoretically, an adverb, from theoretical. Theoretical: an adjective. 1) Of, relating to, or based on theory. 2) Restricted to theory, not practical. Example: Theoretical Physics. 3) Given to theorizing, speculative.
BENJAMIN: [indecipherable] Thanks, HERBIE.
HERBIE: You are quite welcome, Benjamin!
BENJAMIN: Hey, isn't this thing kinda snug?
DR. RICHARDS: We don’t want it to be overly loose. Though, it is measuring about a quarter of an inch short on all sides. How could that happen? Johnny, did you use the measurements I gave you?
JONATHAN: What? Yeah, of course. Now who's seen the green flag?
DR. RICHARDS: Alright Ben, since we’ve already gathered our control time in the unaltered Go-Kart, I’d like to run a few last minute checks before we begin the official testing of the Fantasti-Kart. HERBIE--
HERBIE: Yes, Dr. Richards?
DR. RICHARDS: I’d like you to recalibrate the main--
JONATHAN: [audible groan] It's fine. You've recalibrated it five times. Here, hold this. [hands flag to Reed] Ben, you good?
BENJAMIN: I'm good, kid.
JONATHAN: [shouted] Gentlemen, start your engines! [gestures]
DR. RICHARDS: Johnny! Ben! I strongly advise that we--
BENJAMIN: You hear something, Matchstick? I think Reed’s waving the flag. Can’t hear him over the roar of this engine.
DR. RICHARDS: It’s a quiet engine, that was entirely the point of the--
BENJAMIN: That looks like a flag wave to me; judges?
JONATHAN: [shouted] Go! [imitating] And he's off, ladies and gentlemen...
HERBIE: Remote camera feeds are running. Sensors all within operating range. Audio connection has been established.
BENJAMIN: Esto es muy rapido!
DR. RICHARDS: HERBIE, what was that?
HERBIE: I’m sorry, Dr. Richards! The Spanish language converter was accidentally enabled. The communications should be restored, and corrected.
DR. RICHARDS: Ben, how is it?
BENJAMIN: You weren’t kidding when you said it had a kick!
JONATHAN: He's making pretty good time.
…
Lap 7
BENJAMIN: Hey, Stretch, how's everything look on your end?
DR. RICHARDS: All systems are stable. With every movement of the Fantasti-Kart, the core of the engine is recreating all of the energy that was expelled in propelling the Go-Kart forward.
BENJAMIN: In English.
DR. RICHARDS: Things look good.
SUSAN: I’m going to sit down for a while. You boys keep it up, and have fun.
…
Lap 18
JONATHAN: You still hanging in there, big guy?
BENJAMIN: Doing good.
JONATHAN: Reed's thingy says you're only at 35%. Give 'er some more gas.
DR. RICHARDS: Johnny, Ben, we don’t know the maximum capacity of the engine-- if it overheats or creates too much energy without an appropriately large storage capacity, we could be looking at a very large, very hot explosion.
BENJAMIN: I thought you said it was perfectly safe?!
DR. RICHARDS: It certainly appears to be, at 35%-- but I wouldn’t advise taking it too far too fast.
BENJAMIN: You know the good thing about bein' on a track? It doesn't go anywhere.
HERBIE: Power output at forty percent... forty-five...
SUSAN: Hi. How are things going?
DR. RICHARDS: Everything seems to be going well so far. The core is stable, the chassis is holding. [quietly] How are you feeling, dear?
SUSAN: I’m... [inaudible]... it’s nothing I can’t handle, sweetheart.
JONATHAN: You're at 11 seconds a lap. 10.6... 10.2...
SUSAN: Ben, how’s the control?
BENJAMIN: Starting to get a little squirrelly but nothing I can’t handle.
DR. RICHARDS: Just be careful, Ben. Don’t push any further than you feel comfortable with.
HERBIE: Power output at fifty-two percent.
JONATHAN: 9.8 seconds... 9.6... 9.2 … You're about to set a new record.
DR. RICHARDS: Ben, that last corner looked short; are you sure you want to--
BENJAMIN: I’ve got it.
JONATHAN: 8.7...8.4... Ben, I think--
DR. RICHARDS: Oh my g--
[sounds of a very large crash]
DR. RICHARDS & SUSAN: BEN!
JONATHAN: [overlapping] Flame on!
BENJAMIN: [indistinguishable]
JONATHAN: You okay?
DR. RICHARDS: Ben! Ben, are you alright?
BENJAMIN: Ngh. …. how were the fireworks?
JONATHAN: We kinda owe them a new wall.
BENJAMIN: Guess you were right about your doohickey, Reed.
HERBIE: Actually, the readouts indicate that everything was working within acceptable parameters. The engine did not even reach one-hundred percent output.
SUSAN: I’ll go apologize about the wall, and tell them we’ll pay for the repair. [under her breath] And go throw up. In private.
JONATHAN: Wait, what?
DR.RICHARDS: Susan?
BENJAMIN: Hey, give me a hand here. Johnny. You built the kart, right?
JONATHAN: Don't even think it. This was not my fault.
BENJAMIN: Well, I don't see you crashing into a wall at two hundred miles per hour.
JONATHAN: You shoulda seen it. [pause] Hey. Wait. HERBIE, you got all that, right?
HERBIE: Everything has been recorded as Dr. Richards instructed.
JONATHAN: Cool.