Gwen Dailey; Oracle (digitaldelphi) wrote in musingslogs, @ 2011-02-07 09:43:00 |
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Entry tags: | batgirl, oracle |
WHO: Gwen and Quinn
WHAT: Apologies and holding of the sad mom and daughter variety
WHERE: An OAH
WHEN: Post-Quinn rescue
WARNINGS: None!
Gwen looked and felt like a complete mess. She hadn’t slept, eaten very little, had been in a near constant state of panic for days. If anything, the only think that was keeping her upright was the sheer hope of talking to Quinn once she woke up. Once she heard Luke reach the hospital she got a ride of her own and headed there right away. Luke’s assessment did wonders for helping brace her against the worst news the doctors could offer. During the long ride to the hospital she had been worried that it was the worst idea for her to go there. The past week she had some close calls but she distinctly remembered the last time she had been afraid and surprised when it came to Quinn’s wellbeing. If she couldn’t keep her emotions under control a blackout of any size in a hospital would be a disaster.
But she managed, somehow, and was still upright, somehow, and really she knew it was for Quinn’s sake that she could pull it off. Her body was clamoring for sleep but now the doctor’s had announced she was in stable condition, Gwen refused to leave her side and refused to go to sleep. She wasn’t sure if it was more for her sake or for Quinn’s, but Gwen wanted to be there the moment she woke up. She wanted to reassure her that she was really there, and vice versa.
Quinn looked so small in the hospital bed, more bandages than exposed skin and the skin that was seen was littered with bruises. She had woke up briefly when she was shifted onto a gurney and rolled through the bright lights of a hallway, but it felt more like a dream than an actual event. The haze rolled over her again when a mask was placed over her nose and mouth then she was lost in a fog. She wasn’t sure what day or what time it was when she woke up again, bandaged hands splayed across white sheets. Her body ached in a way she couldn’t even comprehend, like all the pain snuck up on her all at once now she was a little more clear headed. Not as exhausted and weak feeling.
Blinking her eyes open took a little longer to make them focus, turning her head just enough to see Gwen by her bedside. “Mom?” her voice was slurred with medication and sounding more like a tired, weak teenage girl than the brave vigilante she played.
“Hey,” such a small word and so much relief and worry behind it. Gwen’s laptop had been open and she had been quietly monitoring the comms but the minute she heard Quinn’s voice she set her computer aside and her link on mute. She rolled her chair closer and leaned forward, pale hands brushing dark hair off Quinn’s face. Despite how she knew the answer, the urge to ask something like ‘How are you feeling?’ was on the tip of her tongue and she shook her head.
“You gave us a real scare.” There was only a small hint of humor in her words, the truth of it weighing down the words to fall flat.
Quinn looked at Gwen with big dark eyes and visibly relaxed when Gwen touched her hair. For a moment, she was sure that this would fade and Gwen wouldn’t actually have been there. That there was no hospital, just darkness like before. She tried to reach for Gwen’s hand with her own and gave her a ghost of a smile. When she was able to entwine her bandaged hand with Gwen’s, she sighed tiredly and said nothing for a moment. “Came from behind,” she started roughly, her voice still sounding unused to making words. “Needle to neck. No chance to fight.” There was a longer pause before she said, “‘m sorry.”
Gwen squeezed their interlaced fingers for a moment before relaxing, thumb tracing small circle along her hand. Her worried deepened and she shook her head. “It’s not your fault. It was never your fault.” It was mine, though that remained unsaid as she pressed her lips together in a thin line. “I’m so sorry, Quinn. I’m so, so sorry. I’m sorry I couldn’t find you. I’m sorry I let you go out there in the first place. I’m sorry I didn’t chase leads sooner.” Try as she might, all the words came out in a hurried rush and it was only as she felt tears pool at the corner of her eyes and watched the light above her hospital bed start to flicker that she took a deep breath, and then another, and tried to compose herself once more.
Quinn shook her head a little and gave Gwen’s hand a squeeze back. “Don’t,” she started and did what she could only think of to comfort Gwen. She brought her hand up and kissed the back of Gwen’s hand, giving it another squeeze. “No sorries. Please,” it was close to pleading with Gwen. She could burden the blame, but it wouldn’t ever be Gwen’s fault to her. “He was...very careful. Planned for long time. Because I taunted. My fault. Never yours.”
“Still,” Gwen said softly, for there was always more she could done, always something she over looked and shouldn’t have. “I’m supposed to keep you safe. I’m supposed to take care of you and I can’t even do that.” She took another deep, shaky breath as she continued to stroke her hair. “Never again,” she promised softly, even though she had no way of guaranteeing it. “I won’t let this happen ever again.”
“Do so,” she countered back, still frowning. She wanted to sit up and shake Gwen. “What I do. Always not safe. Always been.” For as long as they had known each other, Quinn had always rode this line where she was one step away from being hurt. To get information, she had gone to dangerous places and it’s just what she knew how to do. This side of the portal, she just wore a mask to cover it. “You take care,” she assured Gwen, trying to give her a smile. It was a sad attempt, close to the awkward attempts when Quinn was so much younger and equally as vulnerable.
She paused for a while and gently tugged on Gwen’s hand to ask, keeping her voice low between the two of them. “Do...have talk? About it? Cause...don’t want to. No questioning, please?”
Gwen took care. Her smile was her only faint response. She took care alright, but she could do better. And she would, now. She wouldn’t let this happen ever again.
As for talking about it, she nodded slowly, though her frown showed she was sorry for it. “You’ll have to make a statement to the police when they come around.” Hurriedly, before Quinn could protest, she added, “Just tell them what you can, no matter how much or how little.” In her mind it was little more than a formality. Corbinian pursued the Terror. The masks were taking care of this.
Quinn gave a little smile in response to Gwen’s. It faltered and fell away when Gwen said she had to talk to the police. She didn’t want to talk to anyone about it. No one needed to know what happened over those days. No one needed to know what he made her say and almost made her believe. Quinn shrugged a little, “Can...talk to Kyle? Only person want to. Please?”
Gwen’s smile grew a little wider at that. “I think I can pull a few strings.” She was quiet for a long moment, simply reveling in the fact that this nightmare was coming to an end. Outside their open door she heard people inquiring about other patients and that prompted her. “Your friends will want to come by and visit.” It was a question disguised a statement, making sure Quinn was alright with people coming to visit. Gwen wasn’t sure how she would be able to keep them away but if Quinn gave her the word, she’d send them all back home.
“Good,” she said sleepily, blinking tired eyes at Gwen as she settled back in her bed. “Make Luke sleep first,” she sounded more concerned for him than herself. “No visit until sleep. But...other people okay.” She couldn’t think of who else would see her beyond Wren and Darwin, but that was fine. She needed the quiet to recover on her own. No one else could help her recover like Gwen could anyway. “You sleep too.”
“I’m fine. I already slept,” Gwen replied indignantly, not caring that her tired face said otherwise. “I’ll make sure Luke gets some rest before he comes over.” She was nearly positive Max would insist the same so it was an easy promise to make. “You should rest. You’re the one who needs it.”
“Liar,” Quinn’s voice was heavy with sleep as the morphine started furthering it’s work in dulling away any pain she felt. “You sleep. Or break hospital,” there was a mild chastising tone to it, but perhaps a little line of humor beneath it all. She didn’t let go of Gwen’s hand as she closed her eyes, allowing herself to fall back into a deep sleep.
“I wouldn’t break the hospital,” Gwen muttered to herself though some sleep did sound very appealing. Still, she had some work to do, some loose ends to tie up and there was always the comm. Her work wasn’t ever done but at least this she could put her mind at ease about. Once she saw Quinn fall back asleep she turned her laptop screen back towards her and went back to work, not willing to let Quinn’s hand go.