Ophelia/Ophelia Jensen (love_remember) wrote in musingslogs, @ 2011-01-24 17:44:00 |
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Entry tags: | ophelia |
A Certain Coping Mechanism
Who: Olivia Jensen
What: Coping with Grave Disappointment
Where: Here, there, and Everywhere. A bit of a Montage, really.
When: The past couple of weeks
Warnings: DEPRESSION and ALCOHOLISM if needs be
Olivia did love to drink. Or, rather, she considered drink a medicinal sort of thing. It helped her cope.
Two ounces every 1 - 2 hours, more as needed, for pain. She thought it a nice self-prescription, and she didn't drive, so who did it hurt, really? No one.
Of course, for rehearsals, she tried to be sober as hell. She needed her emotions for music, though by the end of the night, she needed her medication badly. She generally drank a bit on the cab ride home, and woke up throughout the night to drink more, at times.
She didn't have to get falling-down drunk. That wouldn't be dignified, would it? Just a nice, even buzz. It kept her from thinking too much about things, like Liesel, and whatever was wrong with her, like what her father would say if he could see her now. She didn't have to think about how she might be alone forever, and she didn't have to think about drowning, or how nice it would feel, just sometimes, to go to sleep and never wake up. It helped her to deal with the every day stresses of dealing with people, of making decisions.
Instead, she would concentrate on finding a nice cabaret to sing in, she would concentrate on where her next drink was coming from, and she would talk to her plants, talking forget-me-nots into Liesel's apartment, and talking the ivy and vines to grow closer to her headboard. Sometimes, she even forgot that there were flowers in her hair when she went outside in the morning.
There were several liquor stores that she frequented, though none of them on a 'regular' basis. But it simply wouldn't do to have people think this was a habit, now would it?