Who: Deadpool, with special guest appearances. What: Don't fear the Reaver, baby take my haaand... Where: On one of the many flat rooftops over town. When: Tonight. Warnings: Stabbitys. This is Deadpool after all.
Any mercenary worth his salt knows that just like a librarian, to get a job done right, much research and planning goes into the process weeks maybe even months beforehand. Deadpool was a stickler for this. Sure he may have done jobs loudly, messily, even with showtunes, but the job was always done right. Hell, he wouldn't get paid otherwise and then he'd just get nagged for months by himself.
Normally a night out was fairly quiet save for watching out for patrolling officers in the area. He kept a low profile, ignoring the unnecessary comments as he kept a close watch on the lawyer's pattern of behaviour at this time of night. Pour drink, send emails and faxes, bang secretary, drink again. Deadpool loved those who kept tight schedules. Easier to find the weak point and exploit it.
Had Deadpool known what was out there, he might have chosen to reschedule this particular mission. Well, as long as he knew his other self wasn't going to tease and call him a wussy.
As he was putting his camera and binoculars away, his ears picked up on the sound of approaching figures. This was odd considering security wasn't due to shower up for another hour. Pulling one of his guns out of its holster and taking off the safety, Deadpool carefully stood up and aimed the barrel at the intended target.
It was a man. Well, he was sure it was one. The ugly hair, torn clothes and coppery bad smell told him otherwise. It seemed to stare at him only at a superficial level as though Deadpool was just an object rather than another living being. This would have been worrying enough on its own had two others similar to the first man entered his field of vision. He tried to lighten things up with a joke.
"So I knew the weather was shit but I didn't think it was enough to cumulus this kind of crowd!"
In his mind he heard someone making cricket noises, which did nothing to drown out the strange garbled sounds the men were making.
This is the time to make your escape, dingbat. "Well you don't have to tell me twice!"
As they ran toward him, he took note of their heightened speed, firing holes into the man in front of him before the other two forced him to hit the roof below him. Great, you're going to die. This is how you're going to go out: pansy becomes person food in the dark. Why are you in charge of us again? "Shut up I'm thinking of something!" he shouted as he elbowed one in the temple.
Deadpool would be lying if he said he wasn't enjoying this encounter. Any close brush with death gave him a level of thrill he couldn't experience anywhere else. Short of taking a life that is. Perhaps taking them out and running would be great. “Thank you-ow!-genius! You’re the advice guy clearly!” he snapped back. At this point it was difficult to tell who was the sane and who was not in their fight for life and death. Deadpool decided clearly he needed to up the ante. Ignoring the pain in his shoulder as the one creature ripped into him, he wriggled, pulled out his knife and stuck the pointy end through the other crazed man’s chin. It twitched for a few moments before ceasing altogether. Yanking the blade back out, he allowed the warm spray of blood to fly over him before he hurriedly drove it into the other’s chest. Patting the dead man on the head, Deadpool struggled to his feet.
He could see it right in front of him: more climbing over the side, all with the same goal which was to destroy him. He wiped down the side of the blade and held his gun at the ready.
“Finally, a challenge.” He grinned, ignoring the pain all over his body.