Agent Fox Mulder (i_want_2) wrote in multi_fiction, @ 2008-08-23 19:57:00 |
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Entry tags: | rated: teen, sg-1, slash |
Fic: Animagic 1/1 StarGate SG-1
Title: Animagic
Author: Lopaka Tanu
Disclaimer: I do not claim ownership of StarGate Sg-1.
Characters: Sam, Teal'c, General Hammond
Prompt: 2 Transformation (animals)
Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Pairing: Daniel/Cameron
Rating: Adult
Warnings: Language, Violence
Summary: They're all a bunch of wild animals.
Author's Note: What crack? I see no crack! Got some crack?
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The first thing General Hammond thought as he stepped in to the elevator to take him back down in to the SGC was that it felt good to be home. Even after three years of being gone, the base still held a strong sense of familiarity for him. It was good to be back among the old haunts even if it was to deal with yet another crises. At first, he hadn't understood why General Landry couldn't have dealt with it or even Jack. When he had asked about the latter man, their looks had told him all he needed to know.
SG-1 was at it again.
For a Monday morning, the base was quiet. They hadn't told him much about what had happened in the mountain because they didn't know, but the lack of security personnel worried him. This was supposed to be an emergency, Special Forces personnel and marines should have been crawling all over the base. Instead, he had been escorted to the elevator by a lowly private with instructions to report to Lt. Col. Carter's lab.
So, here he was waiting for the doors to open. When they did, it was to a zoo, quite literally. Gazelles came bounding around the end of the corridor being chased by a pack of wild dogs. He had to throw himself back against the elevator doors to avoid being trampled. A troupe of lemurs were using the over head pipes to swing down the corridor in the opposite direction. In the alcove of the security station across from the elevator a host of bats were tucked in watching him.
Running a hand over his face, Hammond could feel his sanity dropping. He started in the direction towards Carter's lab when something he stepped on made him slide a little forwards. Looking down, Hammond shook his head. This was not going to be a good day.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Uniform slightly rumpled, Hammond came upon Carter's lab door. With only a little hesitation from fear of what he would see inside, the General ran his key card through the reader to open her door. What he was expecting wasn't what he got. Instead, there standing on the other side was a relieved looking Carter and a smirking Teal'c. "Colonel, what the hell is going on?"
Sighing, Carter tugged at the bundle of fur trying to climb over her BDUs. "Thank god it's you, sir. For a minute, I thought Teal'c was right and the Raptors had figured out how to get in."
"Raptors?" Hammond knew the vein on the side of his neck was starting to bulge. It couldn't be helped, there was an emergency on.
"Indeed." Grabbing the bundle of fur from Carter's grip, Teal'c tossed it to something black in the corner. "Sg-8 has turned in to a flock of Velociraptor. Last we saw they were locked in the Gate Room, but as is proven by the film Jurassic Park, they are intelligent creatures."
General Hammond was about to tell him it was just a film when the something black in the corner caught his attention. At a quick glance he almost dismissed it, but then turned back wide eyed. As he watched, it stunned the little fur ball by smacking gently against a lab table before wrapping it around its neck. "Colonel, why is there a Gorilla wearing a Mink Stol in your lab? Better yet, why does it have pig tails?"
"That is actually Vala, sir." Carter glanced over her shoulder to make sure that said Gorilla was still engrossed with her appearance in a mirror. When she was certain, she faced the General again. "And that isn't a stol, it's Colonel Mitchell."
"I see. Where are General Landry, Jack, and Daniel? Or should I say, what are they?" At his words, Sam's expression went dark and he had to grab the stool to sit down. This was going to be a doozey. "Give it to me straight, simple terms, colonel."
"I'll try, sir." Casting a quick glance to Teal'c for support, Carter scowled. His blank stare told her she wasn't going to get any from him any time soon. "Okay, I found this device, it's an ancient device. We weren't quite sure what it did. Now we know, thanks to General O'Neill. He was visiting Daniel, well not visiting so much as harping on him for... well that's not really important. What matters is Daniel came to me to help distract Jack. Vala and Colonel Mitchell tagged along. Vala because she was enjoying the bickering and Mitchell enjoyed... well that's not quite necessary."
"I was already here." Teal'c's smug look earned him a snort from the Gorilla.
"Anyways!" Carter spoke over Teal'c to get the General's attention again. If she didn't get it out now, she wasn't going to. "Jack said something about Daniel and Cameron, Cameron got defensive. Vala hit Jack in the back for it, sending him in to the device. He touched it and a flash of light, and well, you can see for yourself." She gestured to Gorilla Vala and her Mink Mitchell.
"Oh really." It wasn't as bad as he thought. Either the Colonel had smoked something she shouldn't have, or the ancients had. Didn't matter, there were a lot of animals in the places of people and he had to deal with it. "Just where are the General and good Doctor now? And why aren't you two effected?"
"Teal'c and I were working on replicating an Asguard Shield at the time, we were protected. As for the other. Teal'c?" Sam gestured with her head towards the General. "You saw what happened, I was kinda unconscious for that part."
"Apparently Daniel Jackson's displeasure with O'Neill carried over to their animals selves." Producing a brilliant red feather from a near by counter top, Teal'c held it up for all to see. "O'Neill is no more."
"What?" Clutching his arm rests, Hammond shook his head. This was the utmost last straw. He was officially quitting tomorrow.
"It is so. O'Neill is stone dead, he has ceased to be." His lips twitched despite the glare from Carter. Despite it being a serious situation, it had been highly amusing. "General O'Neill had become a large, red bird that shrieked. Daniel Jackson is a brown rodent with a long tail. They fought hard, O'Neill did not win."
"Daniel's a mongoose, sir. He... ate Jack." She grimaced. The whole thing disgusted her. "So is Colonel Mitchell. A mongoose, that is."
"And General Landry?" Might as well go for broke. Hammond sincerely wished he was drunk.
"The useless old goat is holed up in his office." Sure, she was bitter, but who cared? "Sargent Davis turned in to a pot bellied pig and they seemed to have struck up a camaraderie. Well, they had until SG-3 ate him, Sargent Davis that is."
At the General's look, Teal'c's smirk returned. "I believe you call them Hyenas."
"Ah." Standing up from the stool, Hammond dusted off his pants. "I take it you are working on reversing this?"
"Yes!" Feeling comfortable now that they were back in a place she knew about, Sam smiled. "I just need a few more hours to..." She grinned at his look. "Three hours and a person with the ancient gene and I can turn back all our people, sir."
"Make it happen." Turning to the door, Hammond swiped his keycard through the reader. "Good luck, Colonel, I'll be in Dr. Jackson's office."
"Doing what, sir?"
"Getting drunk off the grain alcohol he keeps hidden in the Bast Statue."
"Ah, very good."
THE END.......................