[Nods into that because it is soothing, it does help, as do those words. The truth is he's not sure what he can say that Shiro doesn't already understand about him - that he hasn't lived through enough. Yet it's never really enough either, never will be, however familiar the dulled hurt of loss might be.]
It's messed up. [He mumbles quietly, eventually. Resigned to it, but also felt meant more internal in this situation, much as he doesn't voice it or think it as directly as it radiates off him. I'm messed up.] Just...
[Stupid magic and illusions and visions and whatever else.]