[He's coming awake. Slowly. And the good news is, he's not actually naked. Shirtless, yes, with his pants around his ankles, but his tighty whities have secured The Family Jewels.]
It looks like I tripped while trying to take my pants off. [Except he doesn't remember getting drunk, which is weird because it takes a lot of alcohol to just get a vampire tipsy. Getting black-out drunk is basically impossible. Also excuse him while he hops to his feet and wiggles back into his pants.]
But more importantly — whose room is this? Because it's not either of ours.