[Fine. She's been falling apart and he's been fine? It reminds her of the secret she found from him. "I'll never get over her." The one that makes her feel like she's the only one sad about this relationship, because she doesn't think she's the "her."
She's been trying to leave herself open to him. Which means leaving all the wounds open. Part of her isn't sure if she can just be the person she used to be or if she wants that. And she remembers how good things were when they were good with him and she doesn't want to ruin her chance to get back there if they can. It feels like anytime she does something to protect herself it makes things worse between them. Might help if her coping mechanisms were a little less self-destructive.]