[ Rebecca, you are the best for facilitating all this TMI. He's bursting with it and has absolutely no one to talk to. ]
Exactly! Shit changes so fast around here. I'm not even tryin' to get laid and it's still so goddamn messed up. You'd think there'd be an easier way.
[ Like when he was a dumb teenager and first learned that you can have sex with someone without intending to marry them and make sixty babies. Those were nice, simple days. ]