action
Perhaps he just needs time to reconcile some aspects of his life.
[ there's more than just the typical empathy in her tone. this time there's a tone like she understands on a personal level. she gets it. break ups suck. deanna still remembers how it felt to be stood up on risa all those years ago, waiting for him only to find out that he had taken a promotion rather than come see her. it had stung far more than she had ever expected. years had passed before they reconciled and he finally actively pursued her again, years before he recognized the mistake and repaired the damage. she hopes it won't take years for kitty and reid, but time is most likely what he needs right now. ]
Sometimes all you can do is tell him you're there for him, that you will support him in his life. If the time comes that he's ready to continue, you'll be there, but until then, you shouldn't put your entire life on hold.
[ seriously, kitty. she gets it. and she's debating telling that story as a tale of hope, but it may or may not undermine what kitty's going through now. however, if asked, she will likely tell it. ]