[She didn't mean crazy in as serious a way as of course he would take it, but it has been hard.] Just... I still miss you. [Her voice breaks up a little as she says it.] I want to be strong for you and support you, but...
[The pause is long enough it might feel like she isn't finishing it.] I need you. [It isn't all that, but if that was okay then maybe all the moral ambiguity surrounding Spike would feel clearer to her.]