{1}
[The walk is going well--as well as any other walk--until he sees her, and suddenly he's back in the District, watching the prostitutes and their suited clients. She's beautiful. Blonde, just like the woman who had her hair cut off, but prettier.
They're in a bed. Where and when and how doesn't matter because she's stepping out of that dress and Nathan can feel something inside snap and spark and flare until all he can see is her flawless skin and all he can hear is his heartbeat in his head, getting faster and louder and drowning out every part of him that isn't fire and blood. There's a blade in his hand--there wasn't before, but it doesn't matter, either--and it slides into her stomach, making her pretty face distort in a grimace as blood covers the blade and Nathan's hand--
Nathan shakes himself out of the vivid scenario (during which, as Veronica may have noticed, he was staring at her without really looking at her), shaken and shaking. He feels good. He feels disgusting. He wants to claw his way out of his body to escape he parts of him that want to grab the blonde woman, drag her off, and see what's underneath her skin because those parts are too loud. If there was a knife, he's not sure he'd be able to fight...
To someone who isn't in his head, he looks like a boy who's having a panic attack instead of a monster.]