Dean let Ben talk, he didn't interrupt him, even if he wished he could. He couldn't ever really explain his relationship with his brother, or how it took precedence over everyone and everything. It was unhealthy, he knew that, but that wouldn't change anything.
"It wasn't about going off to hunt, Ben. I quit, I got out to be with you and your mom. But she had no idea what she was really getting into." He sighed a bit, rubbing his hand over his mouth, the scratch of stubble against his palm audible.
"Ben, this has nothing to do with Sam. It wasn't about choosing him over you, because if I had the choice I would have you both, and your mom." Hell, he would've married that woman. "It was about keeping you both safe. If you didn't remember me, you'd be useless as a target for demons. It's only fun for them if everyone's upset. I'm not proud of what I did, and I wish to God I never did it, but I did. And it's better that way. You can have normal lives without me."