The angel grunted again, this time in agreement. He wasn't sure who to talk to either, because every single person he would speak to about this was wrapped into the emotional maelstorm that had come upon the angel unawares.
Well. Except Sam. Something to consider, when he left here.
The angel shook his head again, sighing quietly while he looked at his friend. A lot of the anger was replaced with sadness. Was this how Dean had felt, when Castiel had betrayed him? No wonder forgiveness was so hard to come by. Which meant ... he would forgive Dean. Because Dean had forgiven him.
Just not ...right now.
The angel shook his head again. "I am not you, Dean. I am not Jo. I am certainly not Meg. I cannot do 'what I want', knowing what the consequences might be. I will have to think about what losses I am willing to bear, and which of those I am not. I will have to find a way to bring less pain." His eyes went to Dean at his last sentence, sharp, because now at least he knew which direction Dean wanted him to go.
But he couldn't chose the demon just because she had stayed with him. That wasn't fair to Meg, nor to Jo. He grunted again, muttering to himself as he turned, "I need to imbibe copious amounts of liquor."