It was encouraging, though he wasn't sure it should be, that Tanner was interested in men as well. Oh, he didn't fool himself that it meant anything, but then, he supposed it didn't mean it didn't, either. At least, it was more likely. And this young man who was so interested in studying, surely he would be more likely to understand Keith's obsessive need to do well in school? Couldn't such a relationship have a better chance of working? But then, wasn't he possibly jumping ahead just a little? Tanner was friendly, so far, and seemed not to mind his company, that hardly implied relationship status. Still, it did make things a little less impossible, right? And he really did feel a connection to this young man, which was surprising. Keith didn't instant connect with many people.
He laughed softly and shrugged. "Yes, I understand." And he really did. "She is beautiful. I like strong women. You know the woman who played Xena, Lucy Lawless? I think she's gorgeous." He smiled slightly, and then shrugged. "But I couldn't imagine dating those women, or any women. I don't hate them or anything, I just seem to prefer men for that." He drank a little bit more water, then finished his bread, using it as a stalling tactic before he answered the younger man's question.
"It's hard, sometimes." He decided that being honest was the best policy. "People judge you, even people you thought were your friends. They tease you. Sometimes, it's too much strain for the relationship to handle." He shrugged, "But it's easier than lying to the world, I think. I couldn't handle that. I may not speak much, but I don't lie when I do. I wouldn't lie about something as important as who I was in a relationship with." There, that was honest, and hopefully concise. He just hoped that he'd answered Tanner's question.
Once more, he listened intently as Tanner outlined what he liked in a man, and the high regard that he held Tanner in was only increased. He gave Tanner one of his rare smiled and a small nod. "You're a very special person, and I agree. Good looks are nice, of course, but other things, kindness, compassion, intelligence, are much more important to me as well." He glanced over at the waitress who was bringing the steaks, and so he was a little distracted and therefore surprised by Tanner's comment. He blinked at him, then smiled once more. "Thank you. I think I'm just not the easiest person in the world to be with, but I appreciate it."
Keith nodded his thanks to the waitress, then turned his gaze to Tanner. "I... I don't really know, Tanner." He considered briefly. "The guys I dated... there were two of them. One was a jock, but we had to keep it secret. That's how I learned I couldn't handle that. The other was another good, focused student. We didn't work out because I got a higher mark than him on a test. He got jealous." He shrugged, then started cutting his steak. "I think I'm still figuring a lot of that stuff out."