Jack was whistling rather innocently when his whistle slowly turned into a wolf whistle. It looked at first as if he was nodding slowly, but any female who had ever run in tight or particularly revealing clothing would recognize the truth almost instantly. It wasn't that he was nodding, but rather trying to follow something as it slowly went up, then down, then back up again. A dumb look started to hover over his features as he watched it, his mouth opening a little as he watched them go up and down and up and down, his head bobbing with the slow cadence as he tried to keep himself from letting out a little bit of drool at the girl that was running towards him. "Holy Baywatch Flashback, Batman..." he muttered to himself as he blinked repeatedly to try to snap himself out of the little spell that he was under.
Jia had herself some stiff (heh heh) competition for top slot in ye olde Spank Bank.
And it looked as if she was running towards him. His dark eyes going skyward, he wondered which one of his bastard fucking relatives he would have to pray to in order to have her trip right as she got to him and give him a nice facefull of those wonderful bouncing C breasts. Probably Aphrodite, and as far as he had ever read she was a giant fucking bitch. Pass. Still, it was times like this he wished there was some god of stiffies that he could pray to, the patron saint of Porky's or some shit like that. Alright, it was time to stop being in his head and actually start paying attention to the real world around him, the woman was about to come and say something, probably accusing him of starting a fire in the park or something like that.
Instead, what it was that she said caused his eyebrows to raise, and his eyes to shift to the right slowly. No one there. Then shift to the left. No one there either. And she actually seemed... relatively concerned by the way that she was looking at him. Frowning a little, he tried to search his inner self for some sort of guidance.
In his mind's eye, he could see as a minature little demonic version of himself appeared on his shoulder, glaring a little at him. "The fact that you even NEED to have a moral crisis over a big titted girl who you could possibly take advantage of says that you're dumb as fuck, bro. You need to go in for a closer examination of d'em titties!"
Jack paused a little as ANOTHER demonic version of himself appeared on the other shoulder and growled at him in the same tone. "Seriously, broski. You ain't some pussified sensitive blood drinker that sparkles in the daylight and only dreams of making ugly moody high school bitches happy. You're a fucking MAN, so reach down, find your goddamned balls, and at least make a go of hitting that shit, or else I swear to god, both of us are going to fucking kick your ass right now."
Jack nodded a little to himself, having gotten the deep emotional advice he had come to expect from his own psyche as he suddenly groaned and fell forward against Kaydence, letting his head rest against those warm fluffy sweater puppies that she kept hidden away from the world. "Oh god... the pain..." he whimpered a little as he managed to 'force' himself to stand up to look her into the eye, by putting his hands lightly against her chest to give it and innocent seeming squeeze as he pushed himself up.
"It feels... funny... in my pants... C-could you reach in and make sure everything is okay in there?" he asked, pausing a little for dramatic effect, before wimpering out slowly. "My hurt is deep. I need sexual healing...."
Yeah, he was going to get fucking slapped hard enough to cause his head to spin, but goddamned if it just wasn't so fucking worth it.