He couldn't stick to his guns. Looking at her this way, Peter wanted so badly just to pull her to him. Screw doing the right thing by anyone, it was evident what would be right. Maybe Aunt May was right, maybe he wasn't the worst thing for her. Maybe that should have been her decision all along. That was kind of what he had been hoping for when he gave her that almost false hope that he would break the promise in the first place, wasn't it?
He flinched at the mentioning of her death, a coil around his heart awakening as a ravenous python. He swore he choked on nothing for a moment, the grief that had gripped him over her death hardly something he had been able to fully shake. Peter rarely coped well with loss, though he did try to make the most of the lessons taught by those who had passed on once the grief became bearable.
Effectively numbed, he tracked her actions closely. His keen awareness made him privy to every precious nuance of her being, right down to the way she distracted herself from heartache with Titania. The dragon, right, he had been so excited to see the little creature; now he only wanted to see Gwen smile again.
All the spider senses in the world couldn't prepare him for her last question. She wouldn't hang out with him like this? The thought of letting her go woke up something inherently selfish in him. Slack jawed and dumbfounded, Peter stared at her briefly before letting impulse take over. Drawing the pads of his thumbs soothingly across her cheeks, he managed a sheepish smile despite the way his heart ached over her despair.
"Wish I had some poetry memorized for a cooler response," he started, aware that was the culmination of what she had yet to hear. "Don't ever doubt it. That I love you. I love, love, love you. Crazy love. No conjunctions."
So many warning bells were going off, but he didn't care. Rather, he couldn't let himself care. Peter wanted, needed to make her happy.