Dean Winchester (boundtothehunt) wrote in madisonvalley, @ 2018-03-30 00:11:00 |
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Entry tags: | !closed, !log, [plot] rise of the guardians, ~2018 march, ~25 points, ~~dean winchester (boundtothehunt), ~~lena luthor (anameforherself) |
Who: Dean Winchester and Lena Luthor
What: Nightmare induced visits
When: Thursday night
Where: Lena's apartment
Warnings: TBD
Status: Partial gdoc/On-going
After a couple days of killer nightmares that had ruined anything even vaguely resembling sleep, Dean had just given up. He was freaked out, trying to hide it, and seeing his worst fears in the daylight now. More often than not it was his brother beaten and bloodied and beyond help, and Dean knew it wasn’t true, it wasn’t really there. It was just flashes of bad and he’d lived through worse. He’d lived through actually seeing it.
Laying down, early for him, way too early but he was so tired, and closing his eyes ready for another night of the worst nightmares he’d had in a long time, revealed something completely new. Something he was completely unprepared for. Dean wasn’t stupid, he knew how he felt about Lena, even though he tried to keep it under wraps, tried to pretend it wasn’t happening, He cared about her, and the flash in his mind of her, dead, the overwhelming guilt making him completely sure that it was his fault, it had happened because of him, all too real.
As soon as he’d fallen asleep he was awake again, heart racing and bolting out of bed, dragging his pants back on and stuffing his feet into his boots he was out the door without a thought.
He could call her. He could text her. But he needed to see her for himself. He drove across town a little too fast, made his way up to just knock on her door before he stopped to think. When he did, he sighed tiredly, muttering to himself. “What the hell am I doing?”
He didn’t move, though. Just waited for Lena to answer the door, not even knowing if she was there in the first place.
***
The news of others unable to sleep moved quickly through the town as most news did. The nightmares seemed to have various levels and Lena could attest that they could be quite terrible. There were plenty that, throughout her life, had kept her awake at night. They mostly had to do with her brother and the terrible things he had done. Not to mention is varied attempts at her life. He had been so good to her when they were little. Lex had protected her and cared so much for her after their father had died. Especially when her step-mother was downright terrible.
She had managed some sleep, though it wasn’t far from rested. No amount of concealer could hide the darkening circles. No cooling eye cream or cucumbers would help either. It was fine. She would survive.
Lena didn’t know what time it was, but she was still awake when the knock came at her door. Pausing the movie, some ridiculous comedy that would keep most people awake, she opened the door to find a very tired and concerned looking Dean Winchester.
No questions needed to be asked, though. “I just started a movie,” she offered, moving aside to let him in.
***
Relief washed over him the moment she opened the door, and Dean didn’t hesitate before stepping inside to let her close it behind him. He didn’t move to sit down, not right away, stopping just to look at her, to take in how whole and not dead she was. She was safe, even with him there. For how long, who knew, but she was okay now. For how long, that was questionable. Dean always got people hurt, got them killed, it was his curse. It was why he couldn’t have a happy, normal, civilian life. Why he was never going to get to have the kind of happy and normal relationship that he wanted.
He wanted to be able to settle down, have a family of his own, but that wasn’t ever going to happen for him.
Dean paused only for a second after the door closed before he just moved in cautiously, plenty of time for her to back off if he was overstepping some line, to hug her. He wasn’t sure that they had that kind of relationship, he wasn’t sure what kind of relationship they had at all, but seeing her and knowing for himself that he hadn’t gotten her killed yet, that was worth a hug.
***
The hug was a surprise, thought far from unwelcomed. Lena wasn’t sure what their relationship was either or what she could even call it. Did they have one? Were they in one? Was one building? They were an odd couple and probably were practically unlikely, but there was something about Dean. Something that Lena both appreciated and wanted to mend.
Her arms wrapped around him in response and there was content in just standing there. The silence was heavy, but oddly comforting. Taking a step back, enough to look up at him, Lena gave him a half grin.
“While I appreciate the sentiment, are you really going to tell me that you drove all the way over here just to give me a hug?” She would poke at him gently with a level of affection Lena hadn’t used until recently. With Clark. Even then, it wasn’t quite what it was now.
***
Amusement flashed across Dean’s face, that really didn’t sound like something the him he’d let her see until now would do, disappearing as quickly as it appeared. He wasn’t in a humorous mood these days, too plagued by his personal demons to really smile or crack jokes. He didn’t feel much like himself. Or maybe he felt too much like himself.
“I just…” he started, paused to shake his head as he decided to just go with the truth. She deserved that out of him this time. “I needed to see you’re okay.” He didn’t think he needed to explain that he was having dreams. Freaking everyone was having dreams these days, and though they weren’t unusual for Dean, they were worse now. A lot worse.
Suddenly uncomfortable, not sure of himself and not having the energy to pretend he was, he pulled away completely, rubbed his hand against the back of his neck. “I should’ve just called or something.”
***
“Don’t be silly.” He had pulled away, though, and Lena suddenly felt much colder than she had been a moment ago. Perhaps it was her own lack of sleep. “I preferred the face-to-face interaction.” Lena reached out to touch his arm and let her hand drop to his before taking his hand into hers.
“As I said, I just started a movie.” Taking a few steps toward the sofa, Lena gave him a light tug. It was her way of openly inviting him to actually come inside and sit; to try and relax during whatever this current bout of odd behavior was.
“I may even have something decent to drink if necessary.”
***
Dean’s gaze dropped to her hand as she took his and tugged on him, an attempt at a smile rising and disappearing briefly before he just gave in and went along to sit with her. Relaxing wasn’t going to happen, he wasn’t great at it at the best of times and scared and sleep deprived didn’t make it easier.
“You know me. I’m never going to turn down a decent drink.” Or any kind of drink, really. Dean knew he had something of a problem, a dangerous relationship with the bottle, but he figured it didn’t affect his life or his ability to do his job, so it was fine. “But I’m good if you just want to hang out.”
Which actually meant that he was better if she just stayed where he could see her, be assured that she was okay.
***