Who: Johnny Storm and Ian Gallagher What: Freaking out When: Saturday, shortly after this Where: by the river Warnings: none Status: Closed/Complete
Johnny had peeled out of the house as quickly as he’d been able to. Going home to find Izzy and a forest of pregnancy tests, all positive, had rocked his entire world, and he wasn’t sure what he was going to do about it. He wasn’t cut out to be anyone’s dad. Sure, kids had come to town a bunch of times, sure a bunch had been his, and obviously in some universe things were different. He’d thought sure, maybe in another five or six years they could think about it. But not here, not now. He couldn’t be someone’s dad.
Neither of them were ready for this kind of thing, but both of them just wanted a family, one that wasn’t going to just up and disappear on them.
He hadn’t thought to tell anyone, just run off to sit on one of the benches overlooking the river. He could hear kids screeching and laughing from the pool up the road, head in one hand, phone turning in the other. Why he’d texted Ian, asking him to come down and hang out for a bit, he didn’t know. His first call should have been his sister, or the closest thing to a best friend he had around here. Except he’d been kind of a jerk to both of them for wanting to date and he wasn’t really in the mood for his sister’s disappointment in him.
He just liked Ian and didn’t really want to be alone.
***
It was lucky that Ian had just gotten off work not long before, so he was still in town. Not that he wouldn’t have been willing to ride his bike back into town to hang out with Johnny, but it would have taken a lot longer if he had already gone back to the farmhouse. As it was, he arrived about 10 minutes after Johnny texted him. Johnny was definitely one of the coolest people he had met in Madison Valley so far, so he was happy to come and hang out with him.
Ian parked his bike next to the bench where Johnny was sitting. “Hey, man, what’s up?” He smiled, not having a clue that anything might be wrong.
***
If he didn’t have a clue, it would be pretty obvious when Johnny looked at him. Short hair sticking up in a hundred directions from having his hand pushed through it too many times, the tension practically had him vibrating. He had no idea what he was supposed to do right now. For all that Johnny pretended he was a mature and responsible adult these days, and at his age he should be, he wasn’t. He faked it when he needed to, but he felt like a kid in a lot of ways.
A kid who wasn’t ready for what he’d just been blindsided with.
“Hey. Uh, sorry, man. I’m…” He was a mess, didn’t know what he was doing. “You were the first person I thought of.”
***
Now that Ian got a closer look he could clearly see that something was up. He sat down on the bench next to Johnny looking very concerned.
“You don't have to apologise for calling me. Just tell me what's wrong.” Because something was clearly wrong. And anything that could make a literal superhero freak out like this had to be something pretty damn scary.
Ian put his hand on Johnny's shoulder in a comforting gesture. “Do we need to go kill someone?” He asked, only half kidding.
***
He laughed, it sounded a little weak to him but it was a laugh at least, and shook his head, carefully reaching up to remove Ian’s hand. For his own safety.
“Third degree burns,” he cautioned absently. Control of his powers came from keeping a cool head, keeping his emotions in check, and right now they were anything but. Scorching someone’s hand wasn’t going to make anything any better, no matter how much he might want it.
“Izzy’s pregnant.” Regular superhero stuff, no problem. Giant planet eating space worms, sure, he’d dive in head first. This? This was different. And it wasn’t really Ian’s problem, but he’d come and Johnny needed this.
***
“Oh, right.” Ian put his hand down in his lap where he wouldn’t accidentally touch him. Johnny must be really upset if he was in danger of losing control of his powers, Ian thought.
Ian listened and his eyes got wider. “Pregnant, wow. So...I’m guessing congratulations aren’t in order?” He smiled weakly to show he was joking. Johnny certainly didn’t seem happy about it. It wasn’t at all a given to Ian that being pregnant meant you necessarily had to have the baby, though. He had helped Mandy get an abortion, and that was always an option if you had the money and the girl wanted the problem to go away.
“Have you two talked about it? Do know if she wants to...you know...keep it...or not?”
***
Were congratulations in order? Should they be? Johnny had no idea. He had no idea how he felt about the whole thing except he was freaked out in a way that he’d never been by way less normal stuff. Flying into outer space, suden superpowers, taking on super villains and aliens, no problem. Something as mundane as getting his girlfriend pregnant and he was a mess.
“She wants it.” That much he didn’t even have to talk about it to know. She was probably as freaked as he was, but getting rid of it had never come into the conversation. “I didn’t even think of not. Do I want to keep it?”
What the hell? Was he actually just resigned to having a kid he wasn’t ready for?
***
“If she wants it, then you're having it.” Better to get that out of the way and let it sink in. “The only thing for you to decide is how involved you're going to be. Do you want to be a dad?” He asked.
Ian had a lot of sympathy for what Johnny was going through and was silently grateful that it was an issue he was never going to have to deal with himself. Frankly, it was probably a good thing that Johnny was freaking out. That showed he was taking it seriously. Back when Karen had gotten pregnant Ian had thought that Lip immediately dropping out of school and assuming maximum responsibility had been an idiotic knee jerk response.
Ian didn't know Izzy, but he doubted she was a manipulative bitch like Karen. And Johnny was older and a bit wiser than Lip had been.
“For what it's worth, I think you'd probably be a pretty great dad, if that's what you decide.” He added.
***
Older, maybe, but Johnny, and probably anyone who knew him, would question wiser. He’d quieted down a lot in his time stuck in Madison Valley, but he wasn’t anything like the people he thought were good parents. Or who should be parents. He was still just a little bit wild and a whole lot selfish and he liked his life the way it was.
Having a baby would screw all that up.
“You think?” Funnily, that he wouldn’t suck at it, might be exactly what Johnny needed to hear. “I never really thought about kids, you know? Not seriously. Maybe in a ten years from now kind of way but now? I don’t know. I can’t see myself as someone’s dad.”
But at the same time, he’d seen himself as several someones’ dad, every time weird alternate kids showed up in town. He hadn’t managed to kill any of those ones. The older, self-sufficient ones, though.
***
“Yeah, actually. I do think so. Look, I’m kind of an expert on terrible parents...and you’re not like that. You’d never abandon your kid on the side of the road while you went to score drugs and then forget when you left them. Because you actually give a shit about people, and you’re not an asshole. That’s really all it takes to not suck at it.” It might seem like a low bar to clear, but it was the one that Ian had.
“I’m not going to tell you that it wouldn’t be a lot of work...because it would. And it sucks taking that on when you don’t feel ready for it, but sometimes life doesn’t give you a choice about the timing.” No one had given Fiona a choice about basically becoming a mother to her siblings when she was still just a kid, and no one had given Lip and Ian a choice either. They had just done what needed to be done because family was family and the alternative of being separated was worse.
“I can’t tell you what to do, but if you do decide to be a dad to your kid, I think you’d be pretty good at it. You’ve been so cool to me since I got here. If you were half that good to your own kid, you’d be an awesome dad. And what kid wouldn’t want a superhero for a dad?” He asked with a smile.
***
To Johnny, it didn’t seem like there was much of a decision to make. He wasn’t the kind of person who would be able to just walk away from the woman he loved even if he wanted to. Did he want to? Not being a part of Izzy’s life wasn’t something he was prepared to do, he knew that much, but not a lot else. Having a kid would change everything about them, and he wasn’t sure he was okay with that. He loved things the way they were. His life was pretty good, if a little dull.
He didn’t mind the dull, because he had Izzy.
With a sigh, he scrubbed his hand over his hair, pushing it up at all new odd angles. “I guess I always just thought I’d have a say in when it happened.” He should have known better. No one got choices here. Crap just happened. This was just more crap happening. “Or at least I’d be older, you know?”
Johnny was just about the right age to think about settling down and having kids, though. He was twenty-five. A couple more years and he’d be just about cool young dad age. In time for his kid to start going to school or something. But he couldn’t wrap his head around that part. He still couldn’t wrap his head around the part where it was happening at all, that there were still months before there even was a kid.
***
“How old did you think you'd be?” Ian asked. He didn't know exactly how old Johnny was, but he was pretty sure it was somewhere in his twenties, which seemed like a reasonable age to have kids. Then again, it was a daunting task at any age.
“Do you think you ever would have felt ready?” Probably no one ever did, Ian thought.
***
“I don’t know. Thirty?” Thirty seemed like a good, grown up age. Johnny didn’t think he’d be much different at thirty than he was at twenty-five but at least now it seemed a long way off. “I don’t know, man. I’ve never seriously thought about kids. I mean even when this crazy place throws them at us it’s just...hanging out, sorta more like being a cool big brother.”
That he was pretty good at. That he’d pretty much mastered. Cool big brother, annoying little brother. Not a dad.
***
“What do you mean, about this place throwing kids at you?” Ian asked curiously.
“Maybe being a good dad isn't that different from being a cool big brother.” After all, Fiona was a better mom than his actual mom. And he and Lip tried to be better to Carl and Liam than Frank had been to them. “Family is family, no matter what the exact relationship.”
***
Right. Ian was new. He hadn’t seen much weird stuff yet.
“Sometimes this place throws a bunch of alternate universe kids at us,” Johnny explained with a shrug. “A lot of other crazy stuff like that.” It was just something people got used to seeing happen after they’d been around for a while.
He scrubbed his hand through his hair again, still clearly on edge, still freaked out, but he’d calmed down a little. Ian helped. “I guess I’m going to find out, what it is, huh?”
***
Ian knew crazy stuff happened here, but he wasn't even sure exactly what alternate universe kids meant. “So you had kids from another universe?” He asked, sort of confused.
“Yeah, you'll find out, and you'll do fine. Oh, and if you ever need a babysitter I can help. I'm pretty good with babies.” He added with a smile.
***
It was sort of complicated to explain, and Johnny wasn’t the best person to ask. Especially now, absolutely anyone would be better. But since he liked Ian, he sidetracked his own problems for a second. “Me in other universes have kids. Sometimes they accidentally show up here.” Usually they were smart enough to figure out that he wasn’t actually their dad, but that he’d look out for them like he’d look out for anyone, and usually Johnny got to pawn them off on another parent. With one exception. “I’ve never really had to...they weren’t babies. They’re usually just kids. Or teenagers.”
Old enough to kind of look out for themselves, and usually with some kind of superpowers too.
“What do people even do with babies?” Johnny was not a baby person, and he was starting to realize that having one wasn’t even the start of it all. There was all the stuff that went with it. There was babysitters and crying and a thousand other things. He shifted a little, leaning over to nudge Ian with an elbow, his temperature running hot enough that even that would be noticeably warm. “You might’ve just volunteered yourself to be my go-to, man.”
***
Well, that sounded weird. Ian didn't like the idea other versions of him in other universes, much less having kids there. But he probably wouldn't have kids in other universes, because those other versions of him would still be gay, wouldn't they? What if they weren't? If he wasn't gay would he still be himself? He really didn't want to think about that kind of stuff.
“What you do with babies depends on how old they are. When they're really little they can't do much, so you just feed them, change them, hold them, talk or sing to them, and try to get them to go to sleep. When they're older you can do more in terms of playing with them.”
Ian noticed that Johnny was warmer than usual, but it wasn't hot enough to burn him so he didn't move away.
“Hey, no problem! I have three younger siblings I've helped take care of. I started changing diapers when I was five, so babysitting will be a piece of cake.” Ian actually liked babies, despite the fact that they were a lot of work.
***
Johnny wouldn’t be the best person to ask about that kind of thing. He’d had kids with a whole bunch of people show up, but not being picky, he’d probably sleep with any of them given the chance. They’d never led him to question himself, just sort of feel bad for them for being stuck with him for a dad.
He managed a little a bit of a smile, almost looking like his usual self, a lot of the tension he’d carried when Ian had shown up drained. Talking about it helped. Letting someone know that he was freaked the hell out about all of it, having a kid and being a dad, helped. It was sort of nice to have someone he could talk about stuff with, who didn’t have any expectations of what he was. He was staring something brand new in the face, wasn’t really thinking like himself. Ian didn’t know any better.
“You’re going to regret that. Neither of us know anything about babies.” He sure didn’t, was pretty sure Izzy wasn’t much better. They were alike in a lot of ways, and unless being a girl gave her some sort of instinct or something, their kid was probably screwed if it wasn’t for people like Ian. And probably Sue. And Piper. It wasn’t like Johnny didn’t have people he could ask. “Hey. Thanks for coming out. I owe you one.”
***
Ian smiled. He could tell that Johnny had calmed down a bit and he was glad that he had been able to help in some small way. “It’s no problem, man. Anytime. I mean that, whether it’s just to listen, or it’s for babysitting. You can call me anytime.”