WHO Ella, Bucky Barnes & Methos WHAT Forgiveness & an Understanding WHEN This afternoon WHERE Methos' place WARNINGS Talk of the kidnapping & torture STATUS Closed | Complete GDoc
Ella was determined and when she was determined, nothing could really get in her way for very long. After speaking with Captain Rogers, she sought out Sergeant Barnes as well. He had provided her with slightly more information, and now she was fully aware of the fact that Methos had not been himself at all when he'd kidnapped her and Molly. She'd insisted, shortly after Sergeant Barnes reiterated that no one blamed her, that she was off to see Methos for herself next.
He deserved the same forgiveness that she did in her mind because he had not been responsible for his own actions at the time. She didn't quite understand all of it, she could admit, but she understood enough to have gotten that thought stuck in her mind. Ella wanted to speak with Methos in person because she felt the device was too impersonal and she wanted to face her own fears, so to speak.
"I appreciate your company, Sergeant Barnes," she repeated as they turned up Methos' walkway.
***
Bucky was tired and honestly a little annoyed. Ella was all kinds of ridiculous as far as Bucky was concerned. He never should've tried to explain what had happened to Methos but it had all been in an effort to help ease some of her guilt, not to inspire her to forgive the immortal. There wasn't a chance in hell he was letting her go alone and maybe if he could play nice with Methos, the others would stop calling for his head.
"Yea, I'm sure you do, Ella," he replied, a bit sarcastically, not that she would catch it. This was a terrible idea, but at least Ella would proclaim loudly that it was her idea. He just hoped it wouldn't screw up anything with Molly.
She gave him a funny look as he knocked on Methos' door.
"Just remember, if he doesn't want to talk to you, we're leaving." He'd made that very clear.
***
Methos was just tired of having his door broken by MacLeod when he didn’t answer it so this week he’d decided to try something different and open the door to tell people to go away and stop bothering him. He didn’t have a job anymore...left by mutual agreement...and it was difficult to spend any time to be alone. It was either him with his own thoughts or Maria or MacLeod refusing to leave him alone.
Methos immediately regretted his new plan of opening the door for people when he was faced with Ella his former captive, and Bucky Barnes the man who tortured him for kidnapping his daughter.
Still they didn’t shoot him the moment he opened to door so he had plenty of time to stand there and make a target out of himself. That made him irritated at himself for letting his brain out for vacation and let him pull himself together.
“Can I help you?” It was lame but at least he’d managed to say something.
***
Ella could understand why Sergeant Barnes was so tense about visiting Methos, but she thought this was important. When the man in question opened the door, she tensed, but didn't step back. He was still intimidating to her, but she took a deep breath and offered him a small smile.
"I am sorry for the intrusion," she began, still trying to be polite even though she was a bit afraid. Sergeant Barnes wouldn't let anything bad happen to her, though. "Might I speak with you for a few moments?" Ella didn't particularly want to go inside his home, but she didn't want to start a conversation he wasn't interested in finishing.
***
Bucky kept himself even with Ella to start with, concerned for her safety. When it became clear that there wasn't any intention on Methos' part to harm Ella, he stepped back to let her take the initiative. The look he gave Methos told the immortal that he'd better play nice if he was going to play at all and that they'd talk once Ella was finished saying her piece.
He was happy enough to stay in the background on this because he didn't agree with what Ella was doing. However, he knew that the conversation he needed to have with Methos wasn't something Ella should hear. She could say her piece first and then they'd get to him.
***
Oh Methos was familiar with that look from Bucky and he was slightly curious just what else the man though he had to say to him. He’d made his point very clear back in the cell in ways similar to how Methos had made his own points in the past. But that wasn’t important just yet.
If Ella wanted to talk to him he would let her. She was on the list of people to make amends to if he could. Not that he actually thought he could but he at least had to work on it.
“Of course. Did you want to sit on the porch?” Methos didn’t want to put her behind walls to talk to him. She’d had enough of that already.
***
Ella glanced back to Bucky when she heard him move, but since he seemed to be so focused on Methos, she turned her attention back to the man who'd been her kidnapper. He wasn't the same man, not if he'd been under the influence of the dome, so she didn't want to think of him as her kidnapper as he was now.
"The porch would be nice," she agreed. She moved toward the seat that was there and sat close to one of the sides. She trusted Bucky would stand where he was and keep an eye on them. Once they were both settled, Ella wrung her hands on her lap as she tried to find the words she'd thought she'd wanted to say.
"It was explained to me that you are not the same man now that you were a few weeks ago," she settled on, thinking that might be the most reasonable way to start. "I wanted to see for myself and I- I thought I would be forgiven some selfishness in that regard?" She couldn't stop herself from making that a question even though she wanted it to be a statement.
***
Methos made sure to sit as far away as he could without being too insulting and kept his hands laced together in his lap. When he had her captive he’d always invaded her space and touched her to keep her intimidated so he was trying to show he wouldn’t put his hands on her with his body language.
“I owe you whatever you want from me Ella. I know I was under the influence on whatever it is that Madison Valley does but I hurt and scared you. So whatever you wish from me, it’s yours.”
***
She appreciated what he was trying to do and it made her relax a bit. Ella still had the perfect posture, but some of the tension was gone in her shoulders. He wasn't crowding her or touching her, which were both things that he'd done when she'd been kidnapped. She was very much inclined to believe that he really was a different man now.
"You do not owe me anything," Ella decided. "I am alive and healthy. My child is unharmed. It was not a pleasant experience, but it will be one I learn from." She was being much braver than she thought she would be, but seeing him so clearly repentant had inspired it.
She made the first move and cautiously lifted her hand, reaching for him if he was receptive.
***
He’d meant it. If Ella had wanted Methos’ head he probably would have offered it up despite his views on survival. But she asked for something even more difficult from him. Methos had said whatever she wanted so after a moment’s hesitation he slowly lifted his hand to place it into hers.
“You should never had to learn that kind of lesson Ella.”
***
"Perhaps not," she agreed softly, her hand trembling only slightly as he took hers. Ella curled her fingers around his hand and brought her other one over it. "But things happen for a reason and the reason will become clear in time. For now, I- I do not hold any ill will toward you." It was true, despite how quietly she said the words.
"I cannot speak for the others, but I- I know you were not yourself. That you regret what you've done. That is enough for me." Ella took a deep breath and her hands tightened involuntarily around his. "I forgive you, Methos."
***
Methos couldn’t feel like he deserved it right now but he managed a tiny smile for Ella. She was much braver than she gave herself credit for even when he was holding her hostage. She had been tethered by fear but it had kept the other two alive.
“Thank you Ella. You are a very generous person.”
***
Ella didn't feel particularly brave, but she firmly believed that what she was doing was the right thing. She had courage, she was being kind. She hoped so very much that her parents were looking down on her and were proud of what she was doing. "I hope that you are able to forgive yourself one day." She wasn't foolish or naive enough to believe that he could forgive himself immediately. She had only just started to forgive herself for what had happened between the lot of them.
"I will leave you be, give you your space, but-" Ella gave his hand another squeeze. "If there is anything I can do, please ask. I will give you aid if you seek it." She believed she could, at least. She would try.
***
Bucky didn't particularly like the fact that Ella was forgiving this guy so quickly, but he could recognize that the Methos sitting there now was a lot different from the Methos who'd been in the cage at WAMM. He still didn't regret torturing the immortal, but as far as he was concerned, so long as Molly didn't see him unless she wanted to, there wasn't any reason for that to change.
He was only doing this in the hopes that Hill would drop her not so subtle attempts at trying to rouse an angry mob to come after him. Bucky was not an altogether sane and reasonable man to begin with, and after everything he'd done as the Winter Soldier, everything he'd had to come to terms with, he'd reacted out of pure instinct to protect his daughter. He'd do it again, but next time he'd make sure to get the guy before he was locked up.
"Ella," he said, sensing their conversation was done. "Excuse us for a few minutes please." Bucky wouldn't make her wait any longer than absolutely necessary. He gestured for Methos to follow him - of course he'd let the pregnant lady keep sitting - and took him just a few steps away, out of Ella's earshot.
"Look. Ella might forgive you, and I understand wanting to make amends for all the shit you've done." He understood it better than he wanted to admit. "But I want to make sure we're still on the same page here."
***
Methos wasn’t sure what Bucky wanted and obviously it might not be something nice since he asked Ella to excuse them but he didn’t really care. He knew that Maria held what Bucky had done against him because of what had happened to Methos. Methos didn’t give a damn about what was done to him. It had happened before and he’d done his own torturing. What he’d endured was nothing compared to leaving Kronos in a well for a few hundred years. He only cared because the man had knocked out two people he cared about to get to him.
“I’m sure we probably are on the same page. But why don’t you put the terms on the table so we’re perfectly clear.”
***
"Far as I'm concerned, you're not the same guy that I tortured in that cage. You can't be, if I've got any hope at putting my own shit behind me," Bucky said, diving right in without any further preamble. He didn't want this to take any longer than absolutely necessary for a variety of reasons, least of which included Ella and the fact that he didn't want to be any more introspective than he already was.
"But Molly? She's going to need more time than Ella. So my earlier message still stands, alright? You leave her alone. Don't message her on the net, don't talk to her, don't approach her. If you see her on the street, go the other way. Keep away from our house." Bucky made sure to drive that point home with a look. After a moment though, the tension bled out of his shoulders.
"I'll tell her though. That you'll be there if she wants to talk." Because he wouldn't deny Molly that if it was something she wanted, even if he would prefer the pair never contacted each other again.
***
“I have no plans to approach Molly, or your house. I will give Molly as much time as she needs and if that is never then that is acceptable. I can’t promise we won’t ever run into each other because it’s a small town but I won’t be trying to run into her and if we end up in the same place I’ll be the one that leaves.” Methos was fine with the edicts to leave Molly alone. He wouldn’t be trying to be anywhere near Sara either and Ella coming to him would be her choice.
“It took me centuries to grow out of what I was and learn how to be civilized. Remembering what it was like and to not have a choice about becoming it…” He made a face and took a deep breath. This wasn’t the time to spill all of that. Bucky didn’t need to see him as trying to talk his way out of it. “Look, just so you know I don’t hold what you did to me against you.”
***
Bucky nodded, appeased by Methos' agreement to the terms. "I'll take it," he replied. It was all they were really going to be able to get realistically speaking, so he wasn't going to push for anything more than that. He also understood that sometimes the town might throw shit at them, but they weren't going to think about it just now.
They really had a lot more in common than Bucky was comfortable with. He couldn't hash that out with Methos though, and he wasn't going to offer it up either, but it made him understand a little bit more. Hell, if the situation had been reversed and he'd gone after Hill as the Winter Soldier, Bucky would've expected retribution in kind and he would've handled it the same way Methos was.
"Yea well, tell that to your girlfriend. If you guys were trying to keep that under wraps? She blew that wide open." He wasn't going to make a big deal out of it because Bucky literally did not care, but it was his way of offering a slight olive branch.
***
“I don’t think we were trying to keep it under wraps, it was just a little understated until what happened.” Methos smiled slightly but nothing like humor touched his eyes. He was just very good at putting on a normal face even when he didn’t feel like it.
“And I don’t hold anything against you for me but I’m not really thrilled you took out two friends to do it. She’s not going to forgive failing her duty easily. And me saying I understood what you did doesn’t go over very well either. She’s not like me that way and I can’t blame her for being pissed off.” Methos frowned slightly but then sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. He had no idea how to make the situation right and the way it was looking and feeling his being changed by the town was going to cause more trouble than he’d ever want for them. Bad things to him...fine. Bad things to the others...not fine.
“Can I do anything else for you?”
***
Bucky shrugged. Hill was his business, as was the other immortal. "I incapacitated an unknown and subdued Hill as painlessly as possible." She'd put up quite the fight. "I left her in a comfortable position with an ice pack and ibuprofen for the headache she woke up with. It could have been much worse and she knows that." It could've been worse for her and it could've been a hell of a lot worse for Methos.
"She's the lucky one that she doesn't understand, but this crusade she and Barton are working toward? It's not going to end well for anyone, and it's not going to help you. The quicker she understands that, the quicker we can all move on with our lives." He was doing what he could to mitigate it by ignoring Hill and Barton, offering to land himself in jail for however long Wayne and crew agreed upon, and making it clear to the people who'd make a fuss about it that it wasn't necessary. Natasha had already told him to stuff it, but he hoped Bruce would eventually calm her down.
"I stand by what I said though. What's done is done, in the past." Bucky held his human hand out for Methos to shake if he cared to.
***
Oh it could have been worse all around for everyone involved. Something Methos thought about when he couldn’t sleep at night. It was something he’d probably think about a lot right now since sleep wasn’t really happening. Unfortunately his being broken wasn’t helping Maria’s state of mind but that was a slower journey right now.
Methos nodded and put his hand into Bucky’s. Maria might not like it that he was mending fences with the man that had knocked her out and tortured him but he hoped that if the two of them could mend things that it could move out from there and heal other breaches. “The past is the past.” For them at least. Now they could work on moving others past it as well.
***
Bucky shook Methos' hand firmly, but not out of any desire to intimidate or coerce or show his strength. They were just two guys, shaking hands and putting the past behind them. He let go after another moment and nodded to the immortal before he turned his gaze to Ella.
"Ready to go home now, Ella?" he asked, hoping this was enough trouble for her for one day.
***
Ella purposefully distracted herself from the two men conversing until she heard Sergeant Barnes call her name. She stood carefully and made her way down the walkway to stand next to her friend. Though her smile was small, it was honest.
"I appreciate your time," she told Methos, inclining her head as her own goodbye. Perhaps now they could all heal a bit more than they'd been doing on their own.