Who: Yelena and Natasha What: Dieter is gone When: Backdated to when Ludwig Dieter left Where: Black Widows' House Rating: low
Sure, Natasha had warned her about the fact that this could happen, but it didn’t take the sting out of it. Waking up to an empty bed when Dieter had been there the night before was disappointing, but breaking into his apartment and finding out he was no longer in Madison altogether hit Yelena hard. It felt like the blip all over again, except instead of her sister, it was Dieter - the only other person she had really let into her more vulnerable self.
Yelena currently sat at the kitchen table with a half-drank bottle of vodka. The only half was already in her stomach and she wasn’t planning on stopping anytime soon even though she was definitely starting to feel its effects - which was a good thing. She wanted to feel something other than the pain.
She poured another shot, then drank it.
By her feet, Fanny lay on the floor, quietly and worriedly looking at her owner.
–
Natasha had been out at the store picking up a few things - cereal, poptarts, peanut butter, snacks for Dustin to take to school - when she got a message from her sister. Immediately she’d checked out, then made her way home to take care of her sister as best she could. After stepping in, she headed for the kitchen and set her bags on the counter, then picked up a glass and walked over to sit across from Yelena.
Silently, she poured a glass of vodka of her own, then drank it down and met the blonde’s eyes. “Tell me what happened.”
–
Yelena thought about arguing with her sister about drinking the vodka, but she knew if she made a big deal about it, Natasha might threaten to take away the whole bottle and that just wouldn't do. Instead, she just made note of how much she'd have to drink from another bottle to truly manifest the trope of her sad drinking.
She sighed. "Like you predicted. I became happy and complacent and the Dome decided to make an example out of me." She sounded bitter because she was. The Dome was lucky there seemed to be no way to hurt it.
"Dieter's gone home."
–
She wasn’t going to take all of her sister’s vodka - Yelena hadn’t done that to her when she’d been in a similar state - but the difference between back then and now was that Yelena had spent months with Dieter, if not longer, and she could barely imagine what the blonde was feeling right now.
“I would never call you complacent,” she said after a moment. “The Dome giveth and the Dome taketh, apparently, but I wish this hadn’t happened to you.” Every day, she had to remind herself to be careful when it came to her own feelings and heart, but she hated that her sister had been hurt this way.
“It’s not fair.”
–
“It’s definitely not fair.” She echoed her sister, nodding as she looked at the glass in front of her. It seemed like most of her life was a series of ‘unfairness’. Yelena had thought for a brief moment she’d be allowed to finally be happy here with her sister and someone she loved like a normal person. Her only consolation was that it hadn’t been Dreykov this time to take something away from her.
She looked back up at her sister, her lips tight as she reigned in her feelings. She felt her eye twitch just enough to give away she was going to cry and so she looked away. Yelena reached for the bottle to refill her drink and then drank some more of it. The action helped to keep herself from losing it.
“I thought -” A pause.
“When that child came -” It felt easier to talk about their daughter with no familiarity and yet remembering her now hurt more, so she stopped that line of thinking.
Yelena downed more vodka, then let out a mirthless laugh. “You know, I had actually thought about marrying him. I thought maybe the whole picket fence thing was real, you know? Like I used to think about.” Back when they had been ‘American’ and in Ohio. Back before Yelena knew what the real world was like.
She turned her face away a little from Natasha and wiped at her eyes, exhaling.
–
“It can be real, for some people. Maybe even us. Maybe even here,” Natasha said quietly, though deep down she didn’t think she’d ever see that for herself. Honestly, she wasn’t sure it was something she even deserved. Instead, Natasha was more apt to live vicariously through others, like Clint.
And she wanted her sister to be able to have that life for herself.
“You shouldn’t give up on the possibility of it happening someday.”
“Haven’t you?” She looked up from looking at the clear liquid that helped to numb the pain. Yelena knew Natasha had gone through something similar and at the moment Yelena had enough pity party in herself to think of herself as an idiot for not heeding her sister’s warnings. And yet, perhaps the most pathetic part (so her thinking went) was that if Dieter were to come back tomorrow, she’d take him back without a second thought.
“Not really. I came here already knowing what happens for me back there, so I know I won’t be going back to picket fences,” Natasha said easily. Her relationship with Loki was at once both complicated and simple, and in some ways she wondered if that was better for her, to keep emotions out of it.
“It’s different for you.”
“Is it?” She looked up and over to her sister and she meant it. Was it different? Her expression was a little muddled with the reminder that her sister would be dead when they returned home. The Dome had apparently let herself give in to being more optimistic and forget all the bullshit in life. Yelena wasn’t going to make that mistake again, or so she vowed.
“Yes,” she replied, refilling her glass and sipping deeply, then reaching out to rest a hand on Yelena’s.
“And anyway, we should both enjoy the time we have here - whether that’s with each other, or with others. Right?” There wouldn’t be any second chances for her if the dome ever sent her away again, but for the time being? They had one here.
“He could come back tomorrow, you know.”
Yelena was doubtful that Dieter would return, but Natasha was right about the other thing. She should try to enjoy her time here with her sister. She wouldn’t be getting that time back and that was important to her. She might be heartbroken about the man she had come to love, but she knew how her heart had been broken back home learning her sister had died.
“I expect one date night a week all to myself.” She said it was like it was a demand, but it was actually a request.
So far, two of the men Natasha had dated in town had returned, though it had been without their memories of Madison Valley but she figured Yelena wouldn’t let something like that stop her should Dieter return to town.
“One night a week is so demanding,” she said dryly, before grinning at her sister. “But I think I can pencil it into my busy social calendar.”