Who: Dick Grayson and Jaskier (Match Up) What: “Richard” gives the town crier a hard time When: August 8 [Backdated] Where: Streets Rating: low
Richard was in town today with some pouches of coin to give to some of the people who were struggling as well as a few who had been fleeced of more taxes than they should have for speaking their mind to the town sheriff.
It was always a bit of an event when he came into town because he didn’t see people often. One of them Richard knew off-handed as you couldn’t really ignore the town crier. Especially this one.
Richard was currently sitting on a fence as he heard the town crier coming closer, doing his morning round of announcements. He couldn’t wait to hear what they were.
Julian Alfred Pankratz absolutely, completely hated his name. He hated everything about it, to the point where he refused to answer to it. If someone wanted his attention, wanted him to actually answer, they would have to call him Jaskier. He knew it was an unusual name, but it was far preferable to Julian Alfred Pankratz.
What kind of name was that?
“Hear ye, hear ye!” he exclaimed, as he pulled himself out of his contemplation of the hatred of his Christian name. He had a list of things he was supposed to inform the town of today, and he wasn’t about to get himself into trouble by not doing it.
He adored his job.
It looked like it was just Jaskier today and not the boy who was meant to take over for him once he got too old. A pity since Richard liked to give the kid a hard time too.
"Well then? Get on with it. Some of us have places to be and can't wait all day for you." He was smiling though, obviously not actually in a hurry or annoyed.
Yes, it was just Jaskier and not his apprentice today. He had given the boy the morning off, out of the kindness of his heart. Not that he thought he deserved it, but still. Everyone needed a day off every once in a while.
He eyed the man on the fence for a brief moment, then decided to ignore him. He knew how to get his job done, he didn’t have to listen to anyone else. He didn’t need to be told what to do.
“It has come to my attention that a woman named Shosanna has had a child out of wedlock!” he exclaimed. “Despite the fact that she says the baby’s father was killed in combat and they married in secret beforehand, this is most definitely not true!”
He considered his next words, determining how to explain the next bit of gossip.
“Clark Kent has been seen getting particularly close to Lady Lane! A mere stable hand at that!”
*
At the talk of someone named Shosanna, Richard brought his hand to his mouth as if to have a very exaggerated gasp. How dare that happen! The scandal of it all!
This was why Richard preferred being with Robin and the others. Things like this never bothered them. A child out of wedlock would be welcomed by Robin just as much as one through marriage.
It was the second one that caught Richard's ears and his expression turned playful again. “Well how can she not like him? A man with stable hands as you say would be most liked by the ladies.” He winked. Yes, he was deliberately misunderstanding what Jaskier was saying.
–
Jaskier fully understood that Richard was there to heckle him, to get a rise out of him. He was determined not to give in to the heckling, though. It would be highly unprofessional. And Jaskier was (usually) nothing if not professional.
“There is a woman who goes by Lorna who is accused of being a witch,” he decided.
It was a relatively new bit of information that he had received, and he hadn’t quite tried to see if it was true. …not that he usually did.
–
Was Richard slightly annoyed by Jaskier's lack of engagement? Yes, yes he was. He much preferred when he could get a rise from someone. Still, Richard was a stubborn one.
"Come now, Julian. Is the news today so slow that you need to resort to accusations of witchcraft? Shall I cause a commotion in the market to give you something to truly report?"
–
Jaskier narrowed his eyes when he heard the name Julian come from the man on the fence. He absolutely despised the name Julian and he had a feeling that Dick already knew that. Why else would he refer to him as Julian if not to goad him.
“You know my name is not… that,” he said, speaking only loud enough for Dick to hear.
“Donna could very well be with child and news is that it isn’t Dean’s child..” he told the man. “It could very well be the pirate captain Jack Harkness’s.”
He nodded sagely at this.
–
Richard nodded sagely back. “Very important and grave news to share with the masses. You are truly doing a service to the people of Madison. Whatever shall they do without you?” It was true that some of Jaskier’s news was important, but a lot of it was terrible, or so was the opinion of Richard. “I shall go tell everyone I know a woman could be pregnant. It will indeed shock them to their very core.”
–
Jaskier stared at the man for a moment. He considered all of his news to be important. And factually based. “It is not my fault, sir, that you do not know good news when you hear it. Important news.” Dick – Richard, whatever – clearly didn’t know what he was talking about. Jaskier could not understand his thought process. Nor was he going to waste any more time on him.
“I suggest you take your opinion elsewhere if you do not wish to hear what I have to say.”
–
He held up his arms as if to say ‘oh no, I have offended thee’ though his expression was less serious as he jumped off the fence he had been perched on. “Perhaps you’re right. I should go talk to the birds and squirrels. They have more trustworthy things to say.” Plus it didn’t seem like there was any royal announcements or the like that would be useful for Robin Hood, so he needed to move on and report back. “Careful with that mouth of yours, crier, or you might find yourself with a loose jaw one day.” Not that Richard was threatening him or anything, but it was a warning since some people were easily pissed off.
With that, Richard, turned and headed to the edge of town with a bit of a spring in his step.