Who: Balthazar and Castiel What: Balthazar is being ‘accosted’ by the locals When: July 14 Where: Skagway Rating: low
The cruise was a nice divergent from what was typically a pretty boring existence in Madison. He had Castiel, of course, but Balthazar had to let the other angel up for air at some point and they couldn’t exactly have sex all the time. Well, they could, but it’d be frowned upon or… something. As much as Balthazar wanted to simply drink and have sex all day every day, he did recognize that Castiel liked to actually socialize with other people… for some inexplicable reason.
Cas had gone into a shop to look at something - Balthazar had only been half listening - but now he was regretting not going in with the other angel. Three people had approached him in suits that screamed ‘Mormon’. Really, the fact they were in Alaska screamed more desperation to Balthazar and devout.
He was currently listening to them talk to him of what God wanted and God’s will. The angel at the moment was pretending to care. He was nodding and giving overly-dramatic ‘oh really?’ expressions like he bought all this ridiculous drivel. Maybe he should mess with them. Should he mess with them?
“You know, you’re exactly right about everything. You are doing God’s work. I’ve spoken to Him directly and He’s very happy with all your preaching and worship without any real thoughts of your own. And I can prove it too.”
He made a display of his wings which was the closest thing to showing what he really was without burning their eyeballs out - though that was tempting too. Even with it being day, he still managed to burst a lamp post or two. Whoops.
Suddenly the men were prostrating to him. One was saying he didn’t realize that angels were British. “Oh well, only the more important ones are. The lower level angels are American.”
“Balthazar, what are you doing?” Castiel asked, as he came out of the shop. Apparently he had grown bored of being accosted by the locals while Cas was shopping. He supposed that’s what he got for leaving Balthazar unaccompanied, without adult supervision.
And yes, he had caught Balthazar’s last statement to the – were they Mormons? – and he arched an eyebrow at his boyfriend. “So I’m just a lower level angel, am I? And I didn’t know Mormons were prevalent in Alaska.”
Because Balthazar seemed to be having fun breaking the brains of these particular God-fearing Christians, Castiel decided not to attempt to stop him. The other angel deserved to have fun when not in their room with him. He even decided to have a little fun with them as well.
So he took Balthazar’s hand, and pulled him close. Wings and all. He pressed a firm kiss against Balthazar’s lips, allowing it to deepen slightly.
Breaking the minds of people could be fun sometimes.
“I don’t choose the rules, Castiel. I just uphold them.” Which was a huge joke coming from him even if he managed to say it in a serious tone. Of course then Castiel had to go and up the ante and really this was one of the main reasons why he loved Cas so much. He smiled into the kiss when he heard the gasps from the three men. He held the kiss for a moment or two longer before reluctantly breaking it - best not to disrobe Castiel in public. Probably.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot to mention there was at least one thing you got wrong. God is terribly gay. In fact, one could say that it’s really all the hetero coupling that’s got him angry through the years…”
The men clearly could not figure out how to deal with this news and they were utterly conflicted.
It was probably wise that Balthazar chose not to disrobe him in public. While Castiel would have enjoyed seeing the faces of the men who had caught Balthazar’s attention, he didn’t particularly want to be arrested in Alaska. Even though he and Balthazar could handle being arrested. It probably wasn’t the best idea.
“God is also a sadistic bastard,” Castiel told the men. Just to put in his two cents. “Probably not the best person to hold in high regard. …I suggest replacing God with Balthazar.”
While he normally would have reprimanded Balthazar, or at least chided him for messing with humans, Cas was having far too much fun to do so. …sometimes it was fun messing with humans.
Balthazar snorted. He should have kept his composure, but Castiel’s words surprised him enough to get a laugh from the angel. As was to be expected, the humans, when faced with a reality they didn’t like or want to acknowledge, buried their heads in the sand and doubled down.
The men told the duo that they had to be demons in disguise. That their words were from Satan’s lips and they wouldn’t be fooled any longer. Then they said a few non-Christian things before marching away, though Balthazar thought maybe the marching was more like fleeing.
“Wait until Crowley learns we’ve been compared to him.” Balthazar found it amusing.
“We are the worst angels in the history of angels, Balthazar,” he said, grinning at his boyfriend. “So bad at being angels that we were compared to being demons.” Castiel was highly amused by the whole situation. Being called demons, offending the poor, devout Christians.
It was all a lot.
He leaned in and kissed Balthazar quickly, before taking his hand. “Tell me, love. How are you handling having a roommate who isn’t me?”
Balthazar didn't mind being compared. Humans thought hedonism was close to demon traits. Hedonism wasn't as bad as brutally killing people and while Balthazar had to qualms killing the occasional person if necessary, he didn't enjoy it.
"I haven't killed him yet, if that's what you mean… but I'm managing because of all the Castiel time I get during the day." He turned to him. "Speaking of which… shall we find a quiet place to be more scandalous?"
“I don’t see why we have to be scandalous elsewhere, Balthazar. We can be scandalous right here.” He grinned at his angelic boyfriend, and kissed him softly. “But yes. Let’s find someplace quiet. That way we can get it out of your system before you have to go back to you preacher man roommate and his son.”
It amused Castiel that Balthazar’s roommate had a small child and that the small child was in the same room as the two of them.
He would much prefer to share a room with Balthazar, though.