fallinflame (fallinflame) wrote in madisonvalley, @ 2020-08-31 20:31:00 |
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Entry tags: | !closed, !completed gdoc, !log, chloe decker (deckc), ~2020 september, ~~~lucifer morningstar (fallinflame) |
WHO: Lucifer Morningstar and Chloe Decker
WHAT: A meeting
WHERE: The Attic
WHEN: Today
WARNINGS: Nah
STATUS: Closed/Completed Gdoc
Lucifer was well aware that he and Chloe needed to talk. There was much to talk about, including the fact that he wasn’t sure that they were from the same time. There was nothing that specifically stuck out to make him think this way, but there was something that just felt a little bit...off. So he’d sent her a text message and asked her to meet up with him at the Attic, a nice coffee shop that was local and not as crowded as Starbucks.
He showed up on time, a bit anxious about this conversation, but he didn’t let that show. Instead, he took a seat in the back and waited for her to arrive.
***
Chloe was still trying to wrap her head around everything, but none of it still made any sense. Trixie and Lucifer had history in Madison Valley and she was even going to be starting school soon. Something like this was what you would see in the movies, not experience first hand. Trixie seemed to have adapted just fine and the same again for Lucifer. Although, they had been there for much longer.
The last thing she wanted was to give Trixie false hope and so, she had been sharing the one room with her daughter for the time being. Trix was insistent on staying with Lucifer and she was trying to figure that out. Did he really want her there, or was he just trying to be polite? He asked to meet her at some coffee place and she agreed, not too far from the location.
When she arrived at the place she spotted Lucifer in the back and she walked over to the table, taking the seat across from him. "So, how is everything?"
***
He looked up at her, his eyes brightening. It was something that he couldn’t control, no matter how nonchalant he wanted to act about his feelings. Chloe Decker always managed to brighten his day just by being around him. It was something he had never expected from his life.
“Well enough,” he answered noncommittally. Her arrival had made him fear her leaving again, but he wasn’t going to discuss that with her. Not with the fear it engendered in him. He didn’t like seeming afraid, not to anyone.
“And you? How are you adjusting to being kidnapped by something strong enough to kidnap me?”
***
"I'm... adjusting slowly, I guess? I mean, I think I've come to terms with the fact that I am not in the middle of some insane dream." She looked back at him with a weak smile, trying to make the situation less awkward. "I still can't believe that Trixie is living with you. I mean, that's harder to believe than being kidnapped by mysterious forces." She teased with a playful laugh, her hands moving to rest in her lap.
"It seems like a nice place, I've been trying to explore to get a better feel for things. I mean, if I'm going to be here for a while, I guess I need to adjust." Things had been so different without him and she was happy to see him, but he seemed a bit reserved. "How long did you even spend in Hell?"
***
“When you left last time, I could hardly abandon her,” he said, as if that were the most ridiculous thing in the world. “She needed a place to live, and I offered. I figured you would want her living with someone that you know.”
Yes, it was strange that he was taking care of a child, but the fact that she was Chloe’s offspring made her special and made him willing to do so. He might have even been growing a little fond of her.
Lucifer blinked at her words, looking at her curiously as if he didn’t understand exactly what she meant by that.
“Well...I believe I was there for five or six thousand years, give or take.”
***
"Yes, of course I would much prefer her to be staying with you, rather than some complete stranger." She agreed with a nod, touched that he had taken on the responsibility.
Chloe looked at him curiously, obviously surprised by that answer. "It's only been six months by my count and you've been here for a year, I think? Yet, you spent five or six thousand years in Hell? I mean, I know time moves differently and all that, but, that's a really long time." She laughed again and reached up to pull the elastic from her hair, letting the waves spill out over her shoulders.
***
“Well, yes,” he said, also confused by this line of questioning. “Since the time my father threw me from the Silver City until the time I retired and came to Los Angeles.” He thought that she already knew that. He was certain that he’d already told her that. Hadn’t he? Or had that been another version of Chloe?
He was quickly distracted by her hair, though. She so often kept it up in a ponytail for utility, and when it was down he quickly started staring. She was so ridiculously beautiful, he just couldn’t help himself.
***
"Yes, I know about that, but I mean when you left again. I said I loved you and then you left and I didn't think I would ever see you again, Lucifer." She whispered, tempted to reach out and take his hand in her own. "I'm sure you remember that, you have to."
How could he not remember? Or, maybe he was choosing to forget? "It's fine if you've moved on, I understand. I just… I'm not going to get angry with you or anything like that, if that's the case."
***
He blinked his eyes, once, and then twice. He didn’t remember that at all, and he was beyond certain that he would if he’d been there. Hearing that she loved him would have been enough for him to remember it for all eternity.
“I - I think we are from different times, Detective,” he said. He wasn’t trying to push her away, but the little bit of formality kept him from completely losing it after hearing her tell him that she loved him. “You had only just discovered who - what - I am.”
***
"What? No, of course I-" how was something like that even remotely possible? She was from the future and he was in the past? Chloe fell silent, unsure of what to say. "So, the last thing you remember is killing Pierce?"
As she thought about it she wondered if maybe this was a blessing in disguise. She had screwed everything up by running off to Rome and connecting with Father Kinley, but, this Lucifer seemed to know none of that. "This place just keeps getting more and more confusing."
***
“Yes,” he nodded. He couldn’t help but want to know more about her future, especially if it included her knowing him and loving him. It sounded like a rather good one, he had to say.
“It does this quite often, I’m afraid. People come from all different times and places and even people from the same worlds don’t always remember the same things.” He didn’t know quite what to say, so he paused a moment. “I am sorry, Chloe.”
***
"No, it's fine, there's nothing to be sorry about." No wonder he wasn't the way she expected. Chloe shifted in her seat and played with her hands nervously. Her gaze dropped to the table and she wasn't sure what to say.
"Is there anything else you wanted to discuss? I should probably get going now." She felt like a complete fool and wished that the ground would open up and swallow her whole.
***
The first thing he felt was that he didn’t want her to go. Just because he hadn’t told her he cared for her in his timeline didn’t mean that he didn’t care for her. She was the most important person in his life, and he did love her. He just hadn’t worked up the courage to say the words.
But he didn’t know how to tell her that. He couldn’t make the words come, no matter how much he wanted to.
“I...don’t want to keep you,” he said simply, even though he did.
***
Her head cocked to the side and she reached up to brush her fingers through her hair. "Yeah, I'm sure you have all sorts of things you could be busy doing right now." Chloe smiled thinly, trying to hide the disappointment she felt. "I shouldn't have expected anything to have changed in the first place, right? I mean, you didn't-"
She wasn't trying to sound bitter, or anything of the sort, what she said was all true. He owed her nothing and clearly, he wasn't interested in anything further at this point. "It's okay, I'm fine, it's absolutely not a big deal."
***
“Actually, I don’t. I have nothing that I should be doing. I wanted to spend the afternoon having coffee and talking to you which is why I invited you in the first place.” He really didn’t want her to leave. Not like this. Not when there was still so much unsaid between them.
“I didn’t what?”
It wasn’t like his feelings had changed. He simply hadn’t come to terms with them and told her so in his timeline.
***
"You didn't say it back... but, it's fine, really." Their relationship had always been different, but, why was this so awkward right now? "How about you tell me what you want, Lucifer, and I will give it to you. If you're not...if you don't feel the same way anymore, I understand."
Chloe paused and inhaled deeply, trying to center herself in the moment. "I know that Trixie really seems to care about you, and I don't want to hurt her. I just- I have no idea what to do right now."
***
“Chloe, I am from before you, not after you. There is no ‘same way anymore’. I’m simply...not quite to the point that you are.” He hesitated, thoughtfully. What did he want? He wanted Chloe. He’d wanted Chloe for a long, long time.
“You asked how long I had been in Hell. Why did you ask that?”
He needed to start here, needed to know what had happened. And talking of these things would give him a bit of time to think.
***
"Yes, I know that now, Lucifer, but that doesn't mean it makes it any easier. This already so much for me and now I find out that you're the Lucifer I ran away from? I just- things happened, Eve showed up, you spiraled out of control, the demons came up from Hell and you went back to reclaim the throne. I know that I make you vulnerable, Lucifer."
Both hands ran over her face, followed by an exhausted sigh. "You're not the same Lucifer, which means we haven't gone through all of the same things and those things helped to progress our relationship. So, I- I'm not expecting anything from you, that's all."
***
Lucifer blinked, trying to take in everything that she was saying. He had many questions, but they could wait until later. It was the last part of what she said that was the most important - the part about their relationship. He didn’t know they had a relationship, other than being partners and him wanting more but not knowing how to ask for it, or how to tell her. Apparently things had changed enough that he was willing to tell her how he felt. He wished he could be that Lucifer, the one who had been brave enough to say it out loud. He didn’t think he was there yet.
“Chloe,” he said in a low voice. “I care about you very much. My feelings...my feelings are very strong and I think you knew that. Even before some future version of me did or didn’t say anything.”
***
Was she supposed to tell him that she had fled after seeing his face? Should she fill him in on the birth of Charlie, his relationship with Eve and whatever else that had happened? “I care about you too, Lucifer.” she whispered in response and after a slight hesitation, she reached out to take his hand in her own.
“I guess we’ll have to figure out things all over again? I just don’t want to force your hand on anything.”
***
Lucifer didn’t pull away when she took his hand. In fact, he seemed to calm. She made him vulnerable, yes, but she also made him want to be better, to be good.
“If you are willing, yes, I would like that. I don’t want to lose you, and perhaps together we can work towards an end that makes us both happy.”
***
Work towards an end that would make them both happy. Chloe smiled warmly, clearly touched by the sentiment. "You're not going to lose me, Lucifer, I promise." It had taken her a while to accept the fact she was in love with the devil and there were still moments of uncertainty. But, she wasn't interested in anyone else but him. Through all the years it had always been him, the one she wanted.
"I'm sorry that I kind of freaked out about the apartment thing. I just...I wasn't sure if you were offering out of obligation, or if it was something you really wanted."
***
“It’s something I want. And it’s something Trixie wants. I’ve taken care of her, and I think we’ve even grown to tolerate each other, but she needs her mother. I’m afraid I’m not the best parent in the world.” He’d never wanted to be, after all, and only Trixie would ever make him break that.
“We don’t have to share a room. We can get a place that’s big enough for all of us and see where things go from there.”
***
She looked at Lucifer with a smirk and shook her head. "I think you mean that you have grown to tolerate her. She's loved you from day one." Chloe gave his hand a firm and reassuring squeeze. "Lucifer, you are probably an amazing father. It's just not something you're used to, that's all."
She pulled her hand away from his and moved to pull her chair up next to him at the table. "I think it would probably be best if there was an extra room. Not because I don't want to share a bed with you, of course. I just think it's better to ease into it." Chloe leaned over and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. "Trixie is going to be pleased, I'm sure."
***
He had come to much more than tolerate the girl, but he wasn’t going to admit that just now. Maybe eventually he would tell her mother that he loved the little girl, but today was not that day.
The kiss made Lucifer’s mind spin, even as chaste as it was. He returned it - hopefully as chastely as she had, although chastity was not his way.
“Yes, easing into it is wise,” he said, trying to sound calm, although he was smoldering inside. “And I hope you will be happy as well.”
***
The way he looked at her made her blush a little, and her hand moved to rub over his knee. "If I'm with you, I don't see why I wouldn't be happy." Now that everything seemed to be settled, all she wanted to do was touch him. Stroke his hair, caress his arms, lay there next to him.
"If I'm going to be here for the long haul I should start looking into employment. Then I can at least contribute to a house or an apartment with you."
***
“The money is not an issue,” he said, almost seeming slightly offended that she would offer to pay. He had this. “But if you want to find a job in order to be happy, then do that. But you don’t have to right away. You should get settled. Get comfortable. Spend some time with Trixie; she’s missed you a great deal.
His heart was pounding harder than he’d felt in a long time, and he took a deep breath, trying to calm down.
“Shall we go find Trixie and tell her the good news, then?”
***
Chloe had supported herself for so long that it seemed strange to just let Lucifer take care of everything. Paying for where they lived was one thing, but to just stay at home and not work? That didn't seem like something she could be comfortable with, she couldn't rely on Lucifer for constant financial support.
"Yes, I think finding Trixie is in order." She nodded and moved her hand to rub over his back in a comfortable motion. "She's going to be very excited."
***
“Yes, I think she will.” He stood, leaving some money on the table for the baristsas, and offered her his arm as he led her out of the store. Trixie might be excited, it was true, but nothing could possibly be more powerful than the feelings inside him. He had never felt this way before, and simply couldn’t stop smiling.