Emma Carstairs (alsoflexible) wrote in madisonvalley, @ 2020-02-15 13:51:00 |
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Entry tags: | !closed, !completed gdoc, ~2020 february, ~40 points, ~~emma carstairs (alsoflexible), ~~julian blackthorn (nottoleavethee), ~~~~merlin (morethanblood) |
WHO: Merlin, Emma Carstairs and Julian Blackthorn
WHERE: At their house
WHEN: Feb 13
WHAT: Emma finally gets her emotions back
STATUS: Complete
By this point, Emma was willing to admit that there may be something off with her, or at least her parabatai bond with Julian. She still wasn’t convinced that there was something wrong, or that she wasn’t herself, but she was willing to get herself a magical checkup. And if the checkup came from Merlin herself, it would provide her a chance to talk to him and hear about his experiences. Someone as legendary as him must have a lot to offer. So on Saturday afternoon, after she’d come back from cheerleading practice and showered, she came out into the living room. Julian was already there, waiting. “Is he coming here, or are we going to him?” *** “I asked him to come here,” Julian said. He was pacing a bit and he was clearly nervous. If the greatest wizard of all time wasn’t able to fix this problem...he feared that he’d be stuck forever with this shadow of Emma that he had left. And he didn’t know if he could bear that. “I don’t know what he’s going to do,” he admitted. “But I mean, clearly he knows what he’s doing. And if anyone can fix it...well, I think it’s him.” *** If there was anything to be fixed. Emma didn’t say that out loud, though. She and Julian had already argued countless times about whether there was anything wrong with her, and bringing it up again would just be a waste of time. Better to let Merlin diagnose her and move on from there. If there was nothing wrong with her, then hopefully Julian would accept it. And if there really was, then hopefully Merlin would fix it. Either way, they’d get out of this quagmire they kept finding themselves in. “I guess I should get some snacks.” Despite Emma’s newfound patience, she still wasn’t a habitual cook. But there were enough snack foods for three hungry Shadowhunters that she didn’t think there would be any issue with feeding Merlin for his troubles. *** It was but a moment later that Merlin arrived, a quiet but clear belltone sounding from the front door as he stepped to it’s outside. Do things normally? Why? Instead, he used an old spell, the Chime of Sounding, to alert those within of his presence. He wore simple jeans and a t-shirt that was emblazoned with the motto ‘Wizards are the best at Spelling’, and jeans, along with sandals. A staff, tall and black, engraved with runes, fit in one hand, and in the other was a simple platter of brownies. Yes, brownies. Never enter a home without a gift. It was an old rule, but one he still lived by. And so he sounded the tone and waited. *** Julian heard the tone and hurried to the door, opening it for him and stepping out of the way to let him in. He glanced over at Emma, then back at Merlin. “This is Emma Carstairs. My parabatai. Emma, this is Merlin.” He didn’t know if anything was going to come of this, but he felt the anxiety in his stomach and in his chest. He couldn’t help but hope at least a little. *** “Hi.” Emma set down the plate of cookies she’d rustled up and extended her hand to the wizard, her expression distantly polite. Merlin didn’t dress like what she’d expected, but mostly because she’d watched The Sword in the Stone too many times as a child. She could feel the power in him, though, so she was willing to believe he was who he claimed he was, until she got some indication otherwise. “Thanks for coming by.” *** Merlin swept them a bow from the doorway, then stepped in. As the woman, Emma, extended her hand, he shook it, nodding to her eyes on her, curious, wondering. “It is my way and my pleasure to aid those in need, milady. People are concerned for thee, and if you will allow, of thy own word, me to do so, I will attempt to find out why, and aid thee if I can.” Ancient language but Merlin was having a sort of fallback period, these days, and his heart and mind never left those days long ago from whence he came. “Where would you feel most comfortable doing this?” *** It was Emma’s question to answer, but Julian could at least answer the second. “I think here in the living room, maybe? I mean...is it going to take a lot of room? Or do you need silence? Or...I guess I need to know what you need before I decide where is the best place.” Julian had been exposed to magic before, but he was so nervous about this, and about making Emma better that he was talking very quickly. *** Emma, on the other hand, carried herself calmly. She had no emotional stake in this, so she had no problem saying, “I agree to let you examine me to determine if I have somehow been affected by some magical factor that might make me act contrary to my natural inclinations.” She’d had enough experience with the fae to know that one had to be very specific about giving a stranger access to herself. “And I have no preference where to do this,” she added. *** Merlin nodded, a smile of appreciation coming to his face. “Well stated, miss. Well stated indeed.” He was amused, really. But at her and Julian’s words, he nodded. “Then I will ask you to sit, both of you. And to try to be calm, and as still as you can. Find the best way you feel comfortable, and tell me when you are ready. “ To Emma, he went on. “You will feel warmth, and a small amount of discomfort, as I work to read all of your spirit’s sense. But should it grow too much, speak up, and I will stop immediately. “ With a nod, he waved a hand to them. “Let us begin, when you are ready then.” *** Emma nodded as she took her seat. She already was relaxed, so she had no trouble obeying Merlin’s instructions. “You may begin.” *** Julian sat next to her - close, but not touching. He didn’t want to get in the way, but he still felt the need to stay close to her and protect her from any pain that might be involved. He would have grabbed her hand, but felt as if she wouldn’t want that. She hadn’t wanted that in a while. Instead, he just looked at Merlin and nodded. *** Merlin nodded and set down his pack, then lifted from it a simple pair of gloves which he slipped on. “Relax, and think about whatever it is that pleases you.” He set the brownies in midair, where they floated while he worked. And he stepped in, and gently touched one hand to her head and let the other hover before her heart, and spoke softly. As he did, his magical senses swept out, over Emma, and into her, seeking out her state, and her core, to see what magic affected her, and how, and why. To see what her nature was, and how it was affected by this thing upon her, if there was any such thing. It did not pry past that, or push into her further, but covered her from body to soul. His eyes glowed a brilliant gold, then red, then black, and back again, in a cycle, as he scanned her, breathing slowly, She would feel warmth, and a sense of multiple energies sweeping over her and through her. Nothing harmful or hateful, but a gentle touch like the hug of a caring father. And past that, past Merlin, a second presence, almost as if shadowing him, of kindness, love, and infinite warmth, overshadowing all he did. It would take but moments to do, and then would be done as he pulled his hands back. Immediately, a piece of brownie floated to him, and a plate from his pack, and he held out the plate to her. “Eat this it will refresh you.” *** Emma sat through the examination with little reaction. The warmth was an interesting feeling, and she was more curious than comforted or alarmed. Her non-reaction was reflected in the results of Merlin’s spell as well: there was nothing where emotions ought to be. It was as if the parts of her that ought to feel emotions had been wrapped up in gauze and placed neatly aside, leaving only cool logic and emotional emptiness. *** “It is not a curse that afflicts you, milady. Or rather, it is not one that causes your current predicament. I believe that magic, intended foully or not, has wrapped around your emotions, and instead of helping, it has created a barrier, and an effect, which not only causes you to feel nothing, but also causes you to not recognize the lack. “ He surveyed her, and nodded, eyes glowing pure golden now. “Will you let me remove that spell? Will you let me restore you, milady?” *** Emma looked at Julian with mild surprise. He’d been insisting from the start that there was something wrong with her, and apparently he’d been right this entire time. What Emma had thought was a clarity and maturity was really a loss of her emotions. “Looks like I owe you an apology,” she told Julian clinically, before turning back to Merlin. “If there is such a spell on me, then yes - let’s remove it. Can you do so without causing any other side effects?” Because it seemed that this particular spell was a side effect of Chris’s attempt to undo the curse, and she’d hate for an attempt to undo this to cause any other issues. *** Julian wasn’t at all surprised by what Merlin discovered. He’d known all along that something was wrong, and he wasn’t particularly happy to be proven right. Although it did explain everything and convince him that he wasn’t entirely crazy. He just crossed his arms across his chest, though, and let Emma do the talking. This was her choice, and he wasn’t going to make her do anything she didn’t want to do. *** “It will hurt, suddenly feeling what you have not for some time. The emotions rushing back will feel like a heavy weight at first. But as for removing that effect? No, no side effects of that.” He nodded. “Take a long deep breath, and relax as much as you can. And…” And Merlin reached out, gently sliding his magic into her and across the spell that had so twisted things, with careful touches, with careful shifts, he slowly undid the spell, pulling it away from her, absorbing the magic into himself as he did so. As he finished, the magic fell from her and she would feel her mind hit by all she had lost. Merlin stepped back, and nodded to them both. “It is done.” *** Emma gasped and pitched off the couch. As Merlin had warned, all the emotions that been bottled up suddenly erupted back into her consciousness. Through the bond, she could feel Julian’s emotions too: worry; concern; hurt; love. Love. How could she have ever thought that she didn’t love him? It consumed her. She wanted; she ached; she needed… She screamed. *** Julian ran to Emma’s side, taking her hand and looking at her in horror as she screamed. “Emma! Emma, are you okay? What’s wrong?” He’d felt the surge through the bond and knew that things were different, although he couldn’t say that they were fixed while she was acting like this. This was definitely not right. “Emma! Emma. Breathe. Just breathe, okay?” *** Merlin moved to them, and gently touched her shoulder and his. “She has felt all that she has lost and it overwhelms her. You must ground her and give her something to cling to.” He gently nods. “You must reach her, by words, or by kiss. By whatever means that means the most between you. Choose wisely. This is a magic only you can wield.” *** Emma was so overwhelmed with the onslaught of emotions she thought she’d fracture from the force of them. From a distance, she heard Julian’s force, firm and insistent, and she took in a deep, shuddering breath just because he’d told her to. But anything other than gasping and clinging onto him was beyond her; she was fighting for control over her own mind and emotions, and losing. *** Julian didn’t dare kiss her. He was pretty sure he’d get punched if he tried, and that wasn’t what he was going for her. Instead, as she clung to him, he wrapped his arms around her tightly and held her, letting her know that he was there. He wasn’t sure what else to do, but he was pretty sure that he couldn’t go wrong with a hug. He looked over at Merlin and nodded. This was going to be rough, but he was pretty sure the Emma he knew and loved was under there, and as long as she was, he could help her through anything. *** Merlin gently touched Julian’s shoulder and Emma’s and spoke softly. “Let the bond you have, and the emotions you feel guide you home, both of you.” He gently sent strength to both, willing them as much as he could of his own. “You can do this. Together.” *** Eventually, Emma’s shudders subsided, leaving her hanging on limply to Julian. All the emotions and feelings were still there, but she was too exhausted now to process them. She only knew that Julian was still there, holding on tight to her. Julian, who loved her so much that he worked tirelessly to help her get her emotions back. Julian, whom she loved with a force so powerful that it took losing all her emotions to make her stop loving him. And even then, it was only a temporary block. “Julian,” she gasped, clinging on tight. “Julian, I’m so sorry.” *** “Shh, shh, it’s okay,” he said, holding her. And he truly believed that it would be, now. She could feel again, she was Emma again, and whatever happened they could get through it together. He hated seeing her hurt, but he knew the fact that she was feeling enough to hurt meant that they had taken a giant leap forward. He looked at Merlin with gratitude in his eyes. “Thank you for bringing her back.” *** “THank you, young sir, for believing in love. There is no greater magic. Now you will both need rest, so be kind to one another, and gentle. Such a thing does not heal quickly. Take time, and remember love.” Merlin stepped back. “If I can ever aid thee again, I will be here. Simply call my name with intent, and I will answer.” His words were soft as he spoke, looking to each of them. “Until then, may magic walk with you always.” And he tipped his hat to them, a gentle smile on his face as he just… faded away. |