A/N: Completely AU and probably EWE. Written for </a></strong></a>violet_quill for seriously pinch hitting by running hpvalensmut this year. Many thanks to </a></strong></a>blpaintchart for the beta and brit pick
Remus was speechless, as he stood with his door open to the January cold, face to face with Severus Snape. It had been almost twelve years since the Battle of Hogwarts. Twelve. Remus wrapped the man in a great bear hug, and didn’t let go.
“Lupin, it’s frigid out here. Might you invite me in?”
Remus stepped back. “Sorry, Severus. I was just surprised. Please come in.”
Severus nodded and stepped past him. Remus took his cloak.
“May I get you something? Tea..” Remus didn’t get any farther. Severus was striding towards the kitchen.
“Where do you keep your tea?”
“Farthest cupboard to the right.” He heard Severus sigh as he opened it. “Help yourself.”
Severus stopped for a moment.
“I mean it Severus. Pick the one you want.”
Severus pulled out the tin of Twining’s English Breakfast tea.
“Milk?”
Severus raised one eyebrow, high. “Naturally.”
“Would you like biscuits or scones?”
“Lupin, can you really cook?”
Remus laughed. “Of course. I’ve lived by myself most of my adult life without house elves. What would you like?”
Severus eyes seemed to glaze over. “A fry up. A full English fry up.”
The way Severus’ was looking; Remus expected he was going to have to wipe drool from the floor.
“All right, Severus.”
Severus grabbed the kettle. “I’ll get the tea.”
Remus got everything out on the counter. “Severus, I don’t have tomatoes, but I do have mushrooms.”
“They will do. Orange marmalade?”
“Yes.” Remus reheated his potatoes from last night. They were supposed to be for his dinner tonight, but this was so much more interesting. Once the mushrooms were sizzling in one pan and bacon and sausage in another, Remus started the eggs. The toast browned quietly in the toaster. By the time he turned back to Severus, the table was set, and tea had been brewed. He placed a plate in front of Severus, who was apparently going to have an orgasm judging by the way he moaned as he inhaled the fragrance of the tea.
Remus sat opposite as Severus tucked into the meal. Remus buttered a piece of toast while he sipped his tea and watched. Severus looked really, exceptionally, amazingly good. There was a bit of gray at his temples, certainly nothing like Remus’ own all gray mop. His face had filled out, and he had the most relaxed expression Remus had ever seen on that face. “Would you like more tea, Severus?”
“Yes.”
Remus poured.
“Did you know that those Philistines in Canada drink more coffee per capita than Americans? They celebrate Victoria Day, but they drink coffee.”
Ah. So Severus had gone round the twist and somehow ended up here. “Why are you here Severus?”
“I’m British. Where else should I be?”
Well, at least it was actually Severus, cryptic as ever. “Why are you here at my home?”
“I stopped at Minerva’s first, but she’s on some sort of whole grain, organic vegetable, green tea misadventure. She said English food was aging her prematurely.” Severus snorted. “Prematurely, ha, she has to be more than ninety.”
“It’s her new boyfriend.”
“Boy?”
“All right, man. He’s one hundred and twelve. I think he spent too much in time in Tibet. The previous one was a nudist. You should be grateful to have missed that!”
Severus threw back his head and laughed. Remus immersed himself in the warm rich sound, feeling the draw Severus had always had over him, and the sharp pang knowing he’d be leaving again soon.
“A nudist and she..?”
“Oh, yes. I was invited for a clothing optional tea, fortunately without Teddy.”
“Did you go?”
“Of course, I didn’t know it was clothing optional until I got there.” Remus shook his head. “You should never see your former teachers undressed.”
“What about former colleagues?”
“Severus?”
“Do you have any more marmalade?”
Had Remus brain transposed what he wanted to hear onto what Severus had said? “Of course.” Remus fussed in the cabinets for a minute before returning to the table.
“So are you just back for a visit?”
“You didn’t seem terribly shocked when I appeared at your door.”
Remus smiled wryly. “I was relatively certain you weren’t dead, and that Minerva knew where you were. You deserved a life away from all of this if that was what you wanted. So, no I wasn’t terribly shocked to find Severus Snape still alive, it was however surprising to find him at my door.”
Severus sat staring at his tea. The silence stretched.
Remus finally broke it. “You didn’t answer. Are you just here for a visit?”
More tea went into Severus’ cup. Then he asked instead of answered the question. “Am I keeping you from anything?”
Remus laughed. “Are you asking me if I’m employed? Yes, I am. I write a couple of columns for a Muggle newspaper in Edinburgh and one daily piece for the Quibbler. I, also, work with newly changed werewolves for the Ministry. They are few and far between now, but Kingsley invented the job for me when the war ended. It’s like teaching again, and maybe I help them a bit.”
“I assumed you had a job since you have a home, food and your son is at Hogwarts. Which house by the way?”
“He’s a Griff. With his mother brave as she was and both parents equally foolhardy what else could he be?”
“Still pining?”
“Play nicely, Severus.” Remus spoke lower. “You know my first choice turned me down. He told me not to confuse sex with anything else.” Remus wanted to grab him and kiss him and revel in the scent of him. He’d probably only get a bit of sparring, and he’d missed that too.
“Have I ever played nicely? I didn’t want to keep you from your work. I believe the term is ‘being considerate’. Since you are writing, do you use a computer?”
Remus snickered. “Can you imagine sending scrolls to Muggles via owl? A computer is convenient and easy enough to use. Have you been using one at your job?”
“Yes. I’ve been doing potions research and testing. We kept everything on computers in database form. It made things much more efficient.”
“So they’re more liberal about Muggle devices in Canada?”
Severus nodded “And the States, too.”
“You’ve traveled then? And back to my question are you just visiting?”
Severus stood up from the table and put his dishes into the sink. He fussed with the water and started the dish scrubber. “I’m back to stay. I’ve missed certain things here.” He paused. “I want to be with people who don’t gawk at the way I speak…”
Remus grinned. “Severus, people will always gawk. It’s not just the accent, it’s your voice.”
“Nevertheless. I miss tea, not in little bags. I miss the smell of lavender in a garden. For better or worse this is home. I needed time and distance and that’s why…..” Severus stopped but didn’t turn around.
Remus sat staring at Severus’ back, not knowing what to say.
“It’s been thirteen years. I’ve tried to replace….find….have someone in my life. It hasn’t worked. I suppose I don’t want to give enough of --myself away.” With a self-deprecating snort he continued “Not that I ever gave much of myself to anyone, even you. Today, I turn fifty.” He paused again. “Certain milestones require action.”
Remus swallowed hard, his pulse quickening. “I’m not the same person.”
“Fundamentally, I think we both still are the same, even with the inevitable changes that go along with living. If you are unattached I want… would like a chance…..
Remus didn’t know if Severus was going to get any more words out, and it didn’t matter. He’d heard enough, more than he’d ever heard. Remus turned Severus around and pressed him to the counter. Severus wasn’t meeting his eyes, and Remus didn’t give him a chance to try and speak before he kissed him. Slow, deep kisses. Kisses that require touching hair and eyes and jaws. Kisses that left them short of breath. Kisses that had them gripping each other’s shoulders and frotting against each other.
Remus reached up to a cupboard behind Severus’ shoulder, causing Severus to moan at the change of position. Setting the oil down, Remus unbuttoned Severus trousers.
“Here?” Severus asked.
“We’ve never done it in a kitchen.”
“Grimmauld Place.”
“The pantry doesn’t count.”
Severus moved to turn around, and Remus stilled him. “No, I need to see you. Need to know it’s you.” Remus had opened his own trousers and was dribbling oil into his hand. Severus gasped and thrust into his hand as he spread the oil. Pouring more, Remus covered his own cock then grasped them together and stroked. Severus’ eyes closed as he rocked into Remus. Soon, they were moaning and gasping together, as they spilled over Remus’ hand and their shirts. Ignoring the mess and his oily hand Remus wrapped his arms around Severus and pulled him tightly against him.
“Happy birthday.”
Remus could feel Severus’ lips curve against his neck before he whispered. “Perhaps this is not just about sex, but the sex is quite brilliant.”