miracle (miracle) wrote in luke_noah, @ 2007-11-08 11:39:00 |
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Entry tags: | -[luke/noah]-, fanfic, fanfic: [atwt], fanfic: rating: mature, » by: rhardin |
Package Deal
Original poster: rhardin
This is what I think happened after Luke fell.
Luke didn't know what hurt more, his back or the way he treated his boyfriend!
beta'd by sunshine1984
R for words
Luke stared at the clock. 10:45 it glowed. He was so tired he could barely keep his eyes open but tonight sleep was impossible. His mind kept replaying the events of the day. A day that had been a roller coaster. All the events with Noah, going out and of course him falling in front of god and everyone. Then the fight. The pain he felt in shoulders since he fell but was too stupid to tell anyone about. Or too scared.
Why did he say all that? Worse, why did Noah leave? Why wouldn't he--why would anyone stay? Now the pain he felt in his back was getting worse and was working its way down his back. Laying on his stomach wasn't helping. He tried to turn on his side but stopped as the pain got worse.
"Shit," he cried out. It took his breath away and his eyes filled with tears.
"Honey, are you OK?" Lily asked. "I should check your bag, it's been a while," she added.
Luke pulled the blankets closer to him and did not answerhis mother. He bit his bottom lip, doing his best not to make a sound. He wanted her to think he was asleep.
"Luke," she said again. "I just want to make sure you're OK?" He could tell she wasn't going to leave until he answered her. "I'm fine Mom. Go away!" he yelled. He wiped the tears off his face. He didn't know what hurt more, the way he had treated Noah or the pain as it worked its way down his body. He took in a deep breath and for a moment the pain won again. "Shit!" he called out, much loader then he wanted to.
Light filled the room.
"Mom" he yelled. "I just want to go to bed" he cried out.
"I know, I just... need to change your bag. It's almost full honey," she said. Luke looked away as she carefully changed the bag to his catheter and tossed the bag into the trash.
"All done. Are you OK? Do you want..."
"Mom," he said, unable to hide the fact that he was crying.
"OK, do you want to talk about it?" she asked, and started to pull the blankets over his legs.
"Mother!" he yelled. "Please stop. I'm fine. I can't fucking feel them anyway so it doesn't matter!"
Lily backed away from his bed. "If you need anything..." she said and walked out of the room.
Luke waited until the door shut. He pushed his face deeper into his pillow. The pain was almost unbearable now. It worked its way down from the base of his neck and ran down to the bottom of his spine. Why didn't he ask her for
help? He held his breath for a moment hoping it would stop the pain since trying to think of other things didn't help either. He couldn't get the look on Noah's face out if his mind. When he fell and, worse, when he told him to leave.
"Why did I do that?" he cried out into his pillow.Noah was just trying to help, to cheer him up. "He didn't do anything wrong. I asked him to be honest and I pushed him away." He took in a much needed breath of air.
"I'm so stupid!" he cried out. He couldn't not take the pain anymore; he had to do something or what little food he had eaten was going to come up. His body started to shake now. He did his best to turn on his side. He reached down and tried to move his legs, tried to get his hips to turn. But he couldn't get anything to move right.
"Fuck!" he yelled. He didn't look at his mother as she walked into the room.
"What do you need?" she asked. "Oh honey, you're shaking," she said and gently touched his face.
"I need to turn on my side. My back hurts," he forced out.
"OK," she said and pulled the blanket off. She pushed her hands under him. He closed his eyes as she turned him on his side and moved his legs to where she thought he would be most comfortable. "Is that better?" she asked.
He didn't answer.
"Do you want a pain pill?"
"No! Just go!" he yelled, still not looking at her.
"OK" she said and walked to the doorway.
"Mom, I'm sorry," he almost whispered. "I know," she said, and shut the door. She turned and jumped a little as Noah
stood right in front of her.
"Noah!" she said. "You scared me."
"I'm sorry. I couldn't go, I need to talk to him," he said as he pushed his hands into his pockets.
"He's not at his best right now," she said.
"I don't care, I'm not leaving without talking to him," Noah said and looked at her.
She crossed her arms and gave him that motherly look.
"I mean unless you won't let me in there," he said and backed up a bit. Her look softened and she slowly smiled at him "No I'm not going to stop you. But I am warming you, he's in a lot of pain. Enter at your own risk."
Noah nodded and waited until she walked away. He took in a deep breath and knocked on the door.
"Mom, I said I'm fine! Go away!" Luke yelled. He placed his knuckle in his mouth and bit it. The pain was making him lightheaded now.
"It's not your mom," Noah said, a bit unsure if he should go in. Luke pulled his finger out of his mouth and wiped his eyes. "Noah," he said.
"Can I come in?" he asked.
"No" Luke said, wiping his face.
Noah took in a deep breath. "I don't think you can stop me," he said, and pushed the door open.
"Why are you still here, it's late?" Luke said as Noah walked closer to the bed.
"May I sit?" he asked. The last thing he wanted to do was stand over Luke while they talked. Luke nodded but didn't say anything.
"Thanks," Noah said, and sat on the edge of the bed.
"I'm sorry," Luke said. "I didn't mean what I said." He closed his eyes and again held his breath.
"Good, because I'm not going anywhere," Noah said. He reached down and took Luke's hand. Luke swallowed hard and closed his eyes. He wanted to talk, to him tell him everything--but the pain made it impossible to focus on anything right
now. His body shook even worse now.
"What's wrong?" Noah asked. He knew something wasn't right. He'd never seem Luke tremor like that. "Are you cold?"
"No. My back, it hurts so bad," Luke said. "You should go," he said, looking away from him. He swallowed trying to keep dinner down. He know he was going to lose the battle.
"Why? It's all a package deal, the good and the bad", Noah said. "Maybe I could help."
Luke looked up at him. "Why would you want to after what I said to you?" he asked.
Noah took his hand and brushed the tears off Luke's cheek. "Because I know you didn't mean it," he said.
"Can you lie on your stomach?" Noah asked.
"Yeah, I just..." He stopped and looked away. "Oh god," Luke said as he lost everything he'd eaten.
Noah's eyes widened but he didn't move.
"Fuck!" Luke cried out, getting sick again. He lowered his head down on his pillow.
"Now you should go," he said with clinched teeth. "You don't need to deal with this. Just get my Dad, fuck he's gone. Get my mom."
Noah got off the bed. "I'm not leaving," he said, looking around the room. He found a towel and picked it up. He walked over to Luke and wiped his face. Luke pushed his hand away.
"Noah, please," he said but Noah didn't stop. He pulled the blanket off of Luke and tossed it into the dirty clothes basket.
"We need to get you out of there," he said, and moved Luke's chair closer to him.
Luke looked up at him as he placed a towel in the chair so nothing would get on it. Noah helped him sit up.
"What is the best way to move you?" Noah asked.
Luke again looked up at him. "Under my arms." He held his breath as Noah wrapped his arms around him.
"Please watch my tube and lift with your legs, not you back," Luke said, unable to look away from him. He closed his eyes as his chest rested on Noah. Noah gently sat him down in his chair.
"Are you OK?" he asked lowering himself to look Luke in the eyes. Luke nodded and took in a deep breath.
"Do I need to move the bag?" Noah asked, seeing that it was hanging on the frame of the bed. Luke again just nodded. Noah reached over and removed the bag and hung it on the frame of his chair. Noah walked over to the bed and pulled the sheets off the bed. He knew Luke was watching his every move.
"Extra sheets?" he asked.
Luke pointed to the dresser. Noah walked over and removed them and placed them on the bed.
"We should probably clean you up a bit and get you a pain pill?" Noah asked. Luke again just nodded. "The...uh, my pills are on the dresser. I just need one," he said. He watched as Noah picked up the bottle and removed a pill. He picked up a water bottle and held them out forLuke. His hands shook as he took them out of his hand. He swallowed the pill and
took a long drink from the water.
"Maybe your mom should keep them closer to you," Noah said. "Do you want a shower?" he asked.
"My Dad's not here," Luke said. "Only my Mom. I can wait until he gets home."
"I can help you. Luke, I'm not letting you sit like that," Noah said.
Luke looked up at him. "I...OK," he finally said. He didn't speak much as Noah took him into the restroom.
"We can do this with my shorts on," Luke said.
"Luke, you're covered," Noah said. "It's everywhere."
"But I have a tube..."
Noah placed his hand on Luke's lips. "It's OK," he said softly. "Whenever you're ready."
Luke took in a deep breath and held his arms up. Noah lifted him and slid his shorts down, being mindful of the tube. He lifted Luke up into the shower and sat him on the chair. He made sure there was enough slack on the tube before stepping back.
"I can do most everything if you set the water. I can't reach it," Luke said softly. Noah did as he asked and backed up a bit. He pulled his own shirt off and dropped it to the floor.
"I'm going to need to borrow a shirt," he said.
Luke still had not taken his eyes off Noah as he cleaned himself. "All done" he said. Noah picked up a towel and handed it to him. "Fuck," Luke said as he ran the towel over his arms. He placed his hand on his stomach. "What's wrong?" Noah asked.
Luke looked up and forced a smile. "Pain pill is not fast enough," he said, closing his eyes.
"Are you going to get sick again?" Luke nodded and Noah grabbed a trash can and placed it under him just in time.
Noah moved the trash can out of the way.
"All done?" he asked.
Luke wiped his mouth and nodded. "My toothbrush," he said. Noah picked it up and ran it under cool water. He placed toothpaste on it. Luke reached out with a shaky hand and took it. He brushed his teeth and handed Noah the brush. Noah carefully lifted him out of the shower and sat him in his chair. He slowly pushed him to his room. "I have some pants in the closet," Luke said. He watched as Noah walked over and picked out a pair of sweatpants. He sat on the bed. "I should get my Mom," Luke said, looking down.
"I don't mind, what do I need to do?" Noah asked, placing his hand on Luke's chin. He gently lifted it up and smiled.
"You need to clamp the tube and detach it and run it thought the front and rehook it," Luke said.
"Do you need another pain pill?" Noah asked as he helped Luke into the pants. "I think you lost it when you got sick."
Luke just nodded. He watched Noah carefully move his legs and slide thepants up. He closed his eyes as they again came together as Noah lifted him to get the pants up. Noah lowered him to his chair and went to work on the tube. He took the bag and hung it on his bed. He lifted him once again and sat him on the bed. He got him another pill and more water. Luke never took his eyes off him as he moved around the room. He laid Luke down on his stomach and climbed in bed next to him. He placed his hands on Luke's shoulders and started massaging them. He slowly worked his way down Luke's back and up again until Luke's body stopped shaking.
"I'm sure you don't want to sleep that way," Noah said.
"No, on my side," Luke said. His eyes once again locked on Noah as he turned him on his side.
"Are you good?" he asked.
Luke nodded, still watching Noah.
"I think I should..." Noah stopped as Luke held out his hand. Noah took it and Luke pulled him down to him. He climbed into bed and laid behind Luke. He wrapped his arms around him and pulled Luke close to him. He ran his free hand though Luke's hair over and over until Luke fell asleep.
"Luke," he said softly. Luke didn't answer or move. He carefully got out of the bed and made his way into the restroom. He took care of his needs and walked out.
"Noah," he heard. He slowly turned around and saw Lily standing there.
"Thank you," she said. He nodded and headed back to Luke’s room. He climbed back into bed and took Luke in his arms and pulled him as close as he could. He kissed the side of his face.
Lily walked into the room later and smiled seeing them in bed, Noah's arms wrapped around Luke. Luke held Noah's hands tightly in his. Noah's legs were tangled with Luke's. She quietly changed the bag and walked out of the room.
7:45
"Noah," Luke said softly.
"Hmm?" he said, not opening his eyes.
"I can't believe you're still here," he said, holding his hand tighter.
Noah didn't answer; he tried to pull Luke even closer to him.
"Last night," Luke started to say, but stopped when he heard his mother's voice. "Honey, you guys have to get up soon," Lily said thought the closed door. "Your PT will be here in an hour."
Luke took in a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Last night," he said.
"Was no big deal, like I said it's a package deal," Noah said, kissing Luke's cheek again.
Luke brought Noah's hand to his lips and kissed it. "Thank you," he said.
"Any time."
Comments are always welcome!!