I'm sitting in the park where I told him I'd meet him, and those words are the only ones that chase themselves around my head. Not a day ago, I sat here, staring at my cellphone and wondering about Kaneda and coffee. But he was the one who called, and only the gods know what he wants to talk to me about. If he'd sounded angry, I would've guessed that he was still thinking about that not-quite-kiss we shared, Sakae and I. But he'd sounded resigned, instead of angry, and part of me wonders whether it has anything to do with my unkind thoughts of Sakae yesterday.
When he drops onto the bench beside me, he holds out a steaming cup of coffee. It's a nice gesture in the early morning, and I sip it gratefully. It's with no little shock that I realize that he's made it as perfect as take-out coffee ever comes. When did he ever learn my sugar and creamer preference? I dare a glance at him, and he's not looking at me. Instead, he's staring blankly ahead, his own cup clasped loosely in one hand.
"Sakae tells me you confessed your feelings," he murmurs, and I'm instantly wary. Nice gesture or no, he's the one who doesn't seem to approve. His cup lifts, and he sips from it without expression. At this moment, he looks so incredibly unapproachable, I have to wonder if anyone's ever dared to touch him.
"So?" I challenge, a bit belatedly. At that, his eyes shift to me, and now I'm the one looking away, my cheeks a dull red. I try to hide it by taking a sip from my coffee, but from the corner of my eye, I can see him nod.
"Sakae is very fragile. To play with him would be... cruel," he points out, his words obviously measured. Annoyed at his presumption, I turn to speak, and his hand comes up, fingers pressing against my lips before I can do more than take a breath. A small voice in the back of my mind notes how warm they feel. "Hear me out," he directs, and I give a mute nod. Why is it, when his hand pulls away, I almost lean with it to keep those fingers pressed against my skin a moment longer? "Sakae has taken you very seriously, but he has no experience with this. If you intended nothing more than a short term... romp..., please find someone else. Sakae cannot be toyed with."
I can't help it. I promised to hear him out, but the insults sting. "You think that's all I'm capable of? Some short term little fuck and then I'm on my way and I don't care about his broken heart?" I set down the coffee cup before I crush it, wanting more than anything to punch that sincere expression off his face. "Has it ever occurred to you that he might be the one toying with us?" As soon as I say it, even before his eyes go wide, I realize my mistake. I'd admitted knowing what he's feeling. That... is not gonna go down well.
But instead of the temper flaring that I expect, he is remarkably quiet, turning away as his cheeks burn a dark red. "...It has occurred to you, hasn't it?" I whisper, and he jerks up, his coffee cup tumbling to the ground. Part of it splashes on his pants, but he doesn't seem to notice. "Wait," I demand, rising with him and catching his arm. "You hate me. Why are you doing this?"
For a brief moment, there is fury in his eyes. But it's gone before I can say anything, and he tugs his arm free, turning away. As he walks off, he says simply, "Because Sakae loves you."