I'm over my head
Date: 3 June 2010 (backdated) Characters: Connor Moran and Cam Alverez Location: The Hogs Head bathroom Private/Public: Private Rating: R, just because they both swear like sailors. Summary: Cam tells Connor some unsettling news and he doesn't take it all that well. Completion: Completed.
The fact that it felt as though there was someone with a jackhammer inside of her head told Cam that she'd finally sobered up. She had spent so much time drunk the last couple of weeks it seemed as though she'd actually forgotten what it felt like to be this hungover. It seemed as though the pounding headache radiated into other parts of her body. Her neck was stiff and sore, her shoulders felt as though she'd tried to bust down a door with them. In fact, the only place on her body that didn't seem to ache in one way or another was the tip of her nose.
She finished off the last of the coffee that was in her cup and then sat it down in front of her, pushing it far enough out of the way so she could lay her head down on her arms on top of the bar to wait for the bartender to refill the mug. She closed her eyes, only to open them almost instantly again. When she had shut them, she'd pictured perfectly her yelling at Connor over the stupid journal that she'd been given when she had showed up in the Hogsmeade station and they'd escorted her back to her room to "sober up." Part of her couldn't believe the things she'd said to him. And he hadn't known about Katherine, because apparently he was from a year before they even met.
She was fairly certain that her morning couldn't get any worse.
Connor should have been excited that Cam had shown up. She was practically his best friend, and yet, when she started yelling at him over the journals, he had gotten typically hot headed and yelled back. He had even gone as far as to tell her to go fuck herself. He'd never done that before. Then again, he had never been that pissed off at her either. Maybe he wasn't entirely pissed off at Cam. He was more or less in complete shock of what she was saying. Getting some girl he didn't know up the pole? Bull shit. Sure, Connor spent probalby more than his fair share sleeping around but he'd always been careful. Actually, almost obsessive about it, because he wasn't ready for kids. Sure he wanted them someday but someday was still an eternity away.
He spent the rest of yesterday cooling down. Normally his temper usually worked with how much he had been drinking, but yesterday he'd been completely sober, which was what worried him. Maybe it all had to do with the stress of the current situation. This morning he woke up feeling a little better. Maybe he'd even make an effort to go find Cam, and talk to her. Or maybe he'd just get really drunk and bother Nora. Maybe. As Connor walked into the building he sat down at the bar. "Coffee. And I wouldn't complain if you snuck a little whiskey in it for me, yeah?" Connor said resting his elbows on the counter and put his head in them. Jaysus. he thought to himself.
Apparently she was wrong. When she heard the distinctive Irish voice, she nearly groaned. No. If she groaned, or made any noise to draw attention to herself, a shouting match would probably ensue, and that was the last thing her head needed right now. What she did need, however, was more coffee.
The bartender nodded at Connor, before he quickly refilled Cam's coffee cup and fixed up Connor's Irish coffee. Cam lifted her head, tilting it so that her hair created a wall between herself and Connor. Or at least that was what she had hoped for. Turns out, he wasn't on her left. He was on her right, which was the direction she was now looking. "Fuck me." She muttered as quietly as she could.
Connor took the first drink out of his mug and just let the warm sensation go all the way down. He closed his eyes and just let it sink in. He could handle this. Nothing like a few shots of courage. Until he heard a voice coming to his left. Fuck me was right. Damnit. Why did it always work out that the things he was trying to avoid just found him like that?
"Hey Cam." Connor said a little flatly taking a moment before he looked over at her. She looked like hell. He was about to tell her so as well, but he held his tongue. Under normal circumstances it probably would have earned him a dirty look and a sarcastic quip. However, with how their last encounter went, well, he was pretty sure he didn't need a broken nose right now. He was being good, and he was not going to fight with her right now. Not when she looked like shit at least.
She just couldn't believe the luck she was having. Not only was she pulled from her own time and plunked seventeen-odd years into the past, but she was extremely hungover, and was dealing with the object of all her pain and suffering. Lovely. "Hey." It was all she could manage right now. Even that one little syllable, one tiny little word, caused her head to feel as though someone set off an explosion inside of it.
Cam knew, though, that just saying 'hey' wasn't going to be enough. "I-" She, what? She shouldn't have unloaded everything on him like she had? Not that she had much control over her actions that night. She rubbed her face and sighed before trying to speak again. "I'm sorry."
Connor furrowed his brow and narrowed his eyes. She was sorry? Did that make him in the right? Because Connor was sure he was hardly ever in the right, and this may or may not be the first time that this has ever happened. Maybe. And since he wasn't sure, he wasn't about to gloat. For now, he'd have to see where this was going. Actually seeing Cam that messed up was probably doing more for him not gloating, or being an ass than anything else at the moment. He wanted to be pissed off at her, but seeing the result of how drunk she had been, well, it softened him up a bit. Sure he'd seen Cam drunk before, he himself had gotten her quite drunk on several occasions. However, there was something different about this time. And he was quite certain that he didn't' like it.
"I wouldn't worry about it." he decided on as he looked back down at his coffee and drank slowly from it. He started nervously tapping his thumbs on the side of the mug before he turned to the side to look at her and shaking his head. "Oi, Joe, some OJ for the lady?" Connor said to the bar tender, the bartender just grunted and put a glass in front of Cam. Connor was accustomed to bad hangovers, so the friend part of him gave out and was at least trying to be nice right now. "So was that all drunk talk, or am I about to get very, very drunk to the point of not remembering any of the conversation we're about to have?" he finally asked. Connor liked to avoid his problems, but he didn't even know if he had a problem or not.
Cam wasn't sure how to answer Connor. 'Yes' would probably be the best, but then again, he might want to remember it. What the hell was she thinking? There was no way that Connor would want to remember the things she was about to tell him. Hell, she didn't even want to remember them. "I don't know, Connor. If it were me, I'd probably drink until I forgot my name. Oh wait, tried that already and it didn't work." She let out a half-amused laugh.
She took a deep breath, trying to think of how she was going to word what she was about to say. "I'm from 2027. Specifically, my birthday, 2027. Last year, you met a girl named Katherine. It wasn't too long after you broke up with Bridget that you met her, actually. You did your typical thing, play up the fact that your Irish. She fell for it, like all of them do." Myself included. She added on in the head. She shook her head, knowing that she had to continue with the story.
"You took her home, and, well I'm sure you can put two and two together after that." She took a sip of the orange juice, sighing before she continued. "She shows up about six weeks later at the Junk Shop, holding a positive pregnancy test saying that, since you're the only guy she'd ever been with, you were the only possible candidate for the father."
Inside, she was choking up. The last thing on earth she wanted to be doing right now was telling him the story of the past year of his life. It was too hard. But, somehow, she managed to keep going. He needed to know. "A boy. A gorgeous little boy, which you named Aiden. He's got your looks about him, too. Anyway, you wanted him to have a stable family, have a mother and father there to love him and take care of him. So you asked Katherine to marry you."
Connor sat there for a moment, wide eyed ready for Cam to say "Just kidding!" or "April Fools!" or hell even "I'm still drunk." but it wasn't coming. Connor let out a loud nervous laugh, trying to process everything she had said. "Okay, this is the part where you say "Just kidding"." he said his laugh breaking down. "Oh fuck me." was what he said as he let his head fall onto the bar. A warm burning feeling started to creep up his chest that had nothing to do with alcohol. He stuck up his left arm and held up his palm a sign for Cam to stay away at the moment. He didn't need to throw up all over her right now.
He stood up, his head slightly spinning, and rushed off to the bathroom. His bodily reaction to all of this, Connor figured that what Cam was saying was true. Oh god. His mother was right. All that sex was going to get him in trouble. After he had finished he leaned back and rested the back of his head against the cold tile and shut his eyes. He heard the door open, and Connor didn't need to open his eyes to know who was now sitting down next to him.
"Just tell me I handled it better than I just did there." he said bringing his knees up to his chest. So many questions. Cam clearly wasn't happy about this, and he didn't want to keep asking questions and bringing up something painful for her (which why it was painful for her, he wasn't exactly thinking about the moment. Connor told himself that in this moment it was one of the rare times that it was okay for him to be a little self absorbed.).
"Aiden." he said finally opening his eyes and looking at his best friend. "Fuck Cam." he said it still not all the way processing. Actually, he was still in panic mode. But it didn't stop him from leaning over and just resting his head on her shoulder. "Am I at least happy about it? I don't fuck it all up? I mean, I like kids. I just really should never be around them. I've been around me cousin Killian's kids, but still. Me plus kids usually equals a disaster waiting to happen." he paused as he picked up his hands but then put them back down.
"I mean look at me. I drink way to much, I smoke like a fucking chimney, I get into fights on a regular basis, and I'm pretty sure I might explode if my mind ever came out of the gutter." he started rambling on about why he was not the ideal candidate to be a role model, let alone a father.
"Jaysus. Cam. I'm never having sex again." he said closing his eyes for a moment again.
She watched him get up from the bar and rush to the bathroom. She knew exactly how he felt. She let him have a couple of moments of 'alone time' in the bathroom before she sighed and got up to go check on him. She entered the bathroom, slowly, just in case he was still 'processing' everything. When she saw that he was just sitting there, she sat down next to him. "You're a great dad, from what little I see of things."
Cam patted the side of his head when he leaned his head against her. This was the closest they had been in months, and even though it was under the circumstances that it was, Cam actually felt relieved. She adjusted herself so that she could look at him. "Connor, no one expects you to be perfect. You screwed up, yes. It was bound to happen eventually. Everyone screws up. Maybe not in the same ways that you have, but everyone screws up."
When the hell did she become the sensible one?
Connor let out a small groan as he opened his eyes. Something struck him about the tone of her voice. She was being so....nice. Well, she still was his best friend, she was supposed to be nice to him. But not this nice. Then again, when had they ever gone through something like this before? "Do I even want to know right now why you're using words like "little"?" he asked thinking he really couldn't deal with the sudden thought of Cam just not being there. I'd be like saying Murphy and Nora wouldn't be there. And that was something that he knew he couldn't handle right now.
As crappy as he felt right now, it did feel really nice to feel her hand on his head. His stomach was relaxing a little bit, and he didn't feel like he was going to start heaving any time soon. Progress. "But what if I really do screw up. I mean right now, the worst thing that happens when I fuck up is Murphy and I go to jail for a few hours. And that's an easy fix." he shrugged as he picked up his head still looking down at the tiles. "Seriously. I should be the last person having kids." he let out a small laugh and a pause. "Bet Ma's happy though. You know she cornered me a few days ago with the "grandchild" speech." he said bumping his elbow against her. He was trying to be positive right now. The thought of how much he was about to screw up still was weighing on him. But he was trying to remember that he was here right now and there was nothing he could do about it right now.
"Alright. Enough about me before I turn into a woman." he picked up his arm and put it around his best friend, putting her in a half hug. "You were on one hell of a bender there." he said in a way that only Connor could.
Cam let out a nervous little laugh, that was laced with a little bit of annoyance. "Well, from what I hear, your mother is thrilled. Not about how it all came about, I think, but she spoils that kid, according to Murph and Nora." She sat there in silence for a moment, contemplating how to approach his question of why she felt the way she did.
"That's a long story, Connor. One I'd rather not get into right now." She hoped that he didn't press it, because she really didn't want to tell him that she'd shown up to his "wedding", uninvited, and completely drunk. Admittedly, it wasn't one of her finer moments.
"Good, good." he said with a small little laugh as he picked up his arm and stretched out a little. He was still feeling a little jittery, nothing that the remainders of his pack of cigarettes and couple dozen beers couldn't cure. Or something like that. Maybe not. Maybe he'd do the responsible thing and finish off his pack go find his siblings and try and get the fuck out of dodge. You know, whatever. Either way, he was going to have to figure out a way to blow some of this off. He somehow got the feeling that this was one of those things he wasn't going to be able to suppress and not deal with. But he could try.
"Works for me." he said getting the vibe that she really didn't want to talk about it now. He knew that tone of voice, and he wasn't aiming for a broken nose at the moment, so he was being good. But that did stop him from forming a wicked smile on his face and eying her. "However," he said. "I think someone needs a Connor hug." he held out his arms a fair warning that he was about to tackle her to the floor.
She was glad that Connor didn't press her. She wasn't sure how she was going to explain things to him, and she needed as much time as she could get. When he mentioned the Connor hug, her eyes widened. Crap. That was never a good thing. Cam scrambled, trying to get out of his way, but failed. Miserably.
Connor chuckled as she scrambled to get away, as he pounced on her bringing her down the short distance to the tile floor. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and squeezed until she was squirming hard core against him and he heard a distinctive long line of Spanish curses. Yes. His job was done here, he thought as he got up, still feeling the weight of their conversation in his shoulders, but he at least he felt like he wasn't going to vomit all over Cam anymore.