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Castiel ([info]celestialintent) wrote in [info]lost_world,
@ 2013-07-02 21:07:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:!status: complete, anna milton, castiel

A Place Called Home (Anna)
Harry's kindness had been unexpected, to say the very least. He'd been grateful to get the job and hadn't truly expected him to take both himself and Anna on as new tenants, but apparently despite the time period and their lack of a real marriage license, he'd provided them with a place to stay. It was small. Perhaps smaller than even some of the motel rooms they'd stayed in during that one year they were able to hunt together, yet there was a clean bed. Clean shower. And kitchen. All the necessities they would both need to survive.

And he'd wanted to surprise Anna. Granted, it had meant an extra night sleeping the church, but he felt she could forgive him for that. She'd often pointed out that she had an appreciation for the element of surprise and this certainly qualified. She was likely sore from sleeping on the office couch...and it seemed appropriate a night in a real bed after a shower would be a good way to make it up to her.

Leading her up the stairs, he remained somewhat silent on the matter of what they were doing there. If she had any questions, he'd been doing his best to avoid them.

"I promise it's nothing you'll disapprove of," he reminded her. "You simply need to trust me."

That in and of itself felt strange to say. There had never been an occurrence where he felt as if she didn't. Not since they'd become significant to one another, but keeping a secret from her was difficult enough. Especially considering all that he'd learned regarding both Johnny and Rob. There were things that needed to be discussed, but not before he gave her something he'd been wanting to give her for quite some time.



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[info]she_fell
2013-07-03 01:46 am UTC (link)
Castiel had something in store for her and he was keeping surprisingly quiet about it. Anna could tell when he was unhappy and from the way he was acting, this wasn't an unhappy secret. After he told her that she would just have to trust him, that halted questions for the time being. He had earned her trust several times over in their time hunting together. Everything that had come before then was the distant past.

So instead, she just clasped his hand tightly as he led her through a small apartment building.

"I have news for you as well, Castiel. But it can wait until after your surprise."

She was eager to tell him about the job she'd secured, but she wanted to know what he had in store for her as well. She loved surprises but hated the waiting period. She had an inquiring mind and not knowing was equal parts torment and joy at times.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-03 02:09 am UTC (link)
Reaching their door, he took the key he was given and opened it, gesturing for her to go inside first. He'd already swept the entire living space for creatures of malicious supernatural intent and he'd made certain it would be a place Anna would be comfortable with. It was important to him, if only because in their rightful reality, he very likely would never have been able to give her such a thing.

"You knowing it's a surprise negates the fact that it is one," he pointed out with a faint smile. "But even so. I am eager to hear your news."

Entering the small apartment behind her, he flipped on the light. There was no color to go by, the black and white tint still assaulting his eyes no matter how badly he wished to see otherwise. He missed the sky, for one thing. The color of Anna's hair more so, but...these were minor concerns in the larger equation.

The kitchen had been cleaned and he'd found a florist nearby and there was an arrangement on the small table with a note to her. He'd simply had to trust his eye...yet for all he knew, the flowers were only white and green. "I...tried to find warm colors," he admitted. "Ones that would compliment your hair, which I learned about in one of the magazines left in our room approximately four months before I was taken. But...I hope these will do just the same."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-03 02:46 am UTC (link)
Anna looked around the apartment, confused at what they were doing here and even more confused that he was going on about colors when they couldn't see the colors anyway.

She spotted the flowers and turned, a quizzical look on her face.

"Castiel, what is all this?"

He'd had a key to this place, so this wasn't a typical break and enter sort of thing. But why he had a key and how he'd gotten it... well, she didn't know.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-03 03:24 am UTC (link)
"I...would first like for you to look around," he explained, taking a step forward and taking her hands. "If it is not to your liking, then we will find another housing arrangement. But...we did speak of finding a specific place. Of living in one stationary place, rather than traveling with no real destination. It may only be temporary here, but...you are my mate. And you deserve better than a church."

Whatever the rent was, he could pay that. And whatever Anna wanted, he was willing to at least try and give to her. For all he knew, he was doing something completely wrong, but she seemed confused. Not upset with him.

"This is not our own reality and I have no idea if we'll ever return there, but I've missed too much as it is...and I know I need to make it up to you."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-03 03:56 am UTC (link)
Anna turned, her face lit up.

"This place is ours to live in?" she asked. "But how?"

They had certainly talked about settling down and while she wasn't sure she wanted to leave the life, there were days when she agreed that having some sort of home base would be ideal. If she was ever going to put down roots anywhere, it would be with Castiel.

She smiled and crossed the space between them and wrapped her arms around him.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-03 04:19 am UTC (link)
Wrapping his arms around her, he lifted her easily. He didn't know why he found such an act so appealing - he imagined it stemmed from the fact that in Heaven, she had always been much larger in her true form. Now that their vessels had reversed that fact, he'd taken a very simple delight in just how easily manhandled she was.

"The man who owns the bar and I spoke," he replied. "I...said I had a female I intended to marry. And while we waited, we needed a place to stay. He was willing to negotiate."

It had not been a lie. Or else Cas would never have been able to tell Harry any such thing. It was a human tradition and they were human. It made sense. "But yes," he said. "This place will be ours to live for the duration of our stay here. If you want it."

The light in her face suggested that she did. But he would take her smile regardless, simply because in his human state, he could trust just how beautiful it was.

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-03 04:30 am UTC (link)
Anna couldn't help but stare at the story that Castiel said he'd given the man who owned the bar. She searched his face for any sign that this was simply a cover story or some sort of roundabout proposal. She didn't find any definitive answer, and she wasn't sure how to ask without putting him on the spot.

She reached up and kissed him, still smiling.

"I would like nothing more than to stay here with you."

She knew that it wouldn't be forever, but the fact that he was trying to carve out a space that would be their own sent tingles down her spine.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-03 05:00 am UTC (link)
Returning her kiss, he set her down gently and pressed his forehead to hers in an affectionate gesture. "I know you will stay here with me," he replied. "If we have our way, there will be no more separations."

He'd already resigned himself to the fact that he would kill any who attempted to take her from him or vise-versa. He would deal with the consequences at a later time, but there were very few kills that Cas regretted during his time as a hunter. But...that was not what was primarily on his mind.

"But...I am asking you," he said finally. "I know this is a matter I have little knowledge or experience in. And we have no way of knowing if we will not be separated again. But...if you would allow me to be your husband as well as your mate...I would gladly rise to the challenge."

To Cas, it only seemed right to ask at the present time. He'd had time to think, aboard the cruise ship. And within whatever interplanetary holding cell they were in and he knew that he loved Anna and wanted no other. Even if marriage made little sense to him, he was willing to partake of it if it pleased her. And it didn't occur to him that she could decline.

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-03 07:09 pm UTC (link)
Anna had been human long enough to understand just how much marriage could mean and long enough to develop her own ideas about what it should and shouldn't be. Or at least, what she would want it to be. She also believed that humans could be damn wrongheaded in what they expected from such a promise. All the same, her face lit up at the offer laid before her.

"Castiel," she breathed slowly, "are you sure this is what you want?"

The very last thing she wanted was someone making that promise simply for her sake.

"A lifetime is a big thing to promise after all."

It wasn't that she thought that he didn't understand what he was asking, but she wanted to hear his answer before she said yes. For she was sure of what she wanted and yes was the only possible answer.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-04 12:21 am UTC (link)
Cas nodded promptly without looking away. "Yes," he replied. "You are my mate. And though I understand that our chosen profession has its hazards and there is a possibility either of us could be taken from one another again, I still have no desire for another. I want you. And my lifetime is yours to take. It...has been for some time."

He was of the opinion that while Dean's often misguided actions had shaped him as a human, Anna had been the one to fix him. He never would have explored his own emotions or thought to seek companionship in another. He'd been encouraged to mate for purely sexual reasons and had otherwise been perceived as little more than a weapon. That...that was not the existence he wanted for himself. And his time away from her had let him know just how important to him she was.

As for Anna, her expression reflected joy, rather than uncertainty or fear. From what he'd taken the time to study on the subject, this was a good sign.

"I'm...meant to give you a ring now. Should you choose to accept."

He'd had it for some time. The only thing he'd managed to keep from the cruise ship, but it was truly all he required. Thankfully, it had been within the pocket of his suit jacket upon arrival, just as it had been within his usual leather jacket. If it had not been, he felt he would have been annoyed further.

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-04 12:31 am UTC (link)
Anna stared, still in a bit of shock over the question and how much thought he must have put into it. She had almost let herself believe that he was asking to keep with the cover. Her mouth was slightly agape, but her lips curved up into a smile and she let out a happy laugh before she pulled him closer and pressed her lips to his.

"The answer is yes, Castiel."

It hadn't been long since they'd found each other again, but the time apart had given her some insight into just how important he was to her. She'd felt like something was missing up until that moment when she'd dropped onto that bizarre planet and encountered Castiel.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-04 01:02 am UTC (link)
For a moment, he had to wonder if he'd said something amusing, but once she kissed him, Cas allowed himself to relax. He hadn't been tense to begin with, but there was a definite sense of elation once she gave a definitive statement of acceptance. He kissed her back deeply and pulled her close, still not quite trusting their new reality not to take her from him whenever it pleased.

He then found the ring in the same pocket he'd left it and took her left hand, forehead still touching hers. The idea of a ceremony or any form of formality was alien to him. He'd laid claim to her many times and she'd had him the moment she'd shown a form of interest. Still...he did wish to do what came naturally to humans in this sense. At least where this was concerned. Angelic mates were rare and therefore had no actual tradition.

"I-Is this...am I doing this right?" he asked softly.

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-04 02:40 am UTC (link)
Anna looked at the ring, still surprised that he had one at all. She stretched her ring finger out to allow him to put it on and smiled up at him.

"Perfectly," she said. "When did you get this?"

They'd arrived with no money, so she didn't believe that he could have picked up the ring on this planet. So when? How long had he been thinking about this?

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-04 02:56 am UTC (link)
"On the cruise liner," he explained. "It...served as a motivator. I wanted to return home to you in order to give it to you then, but...you're here now. I felt it was right. After all, I have no intention of losing you again."

Normally, he understood he never would have been able to give it to her. But if his experiences aboard the cruise liner had any form of silver lining, then he was willing to accept this as one of them.

Kissing her forehead, he then cupped the side of her face and stroked her cheek lovingly. "You...said you also had news?"

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-04 03:40 am UTC (link)
Anna's right hand came to rest at nape of Castiel's neck as she shifted just a little bit closer. Her left hand rested on his shoulder as she splayed out her fingers to admire the ring.

"You got this for me? While we were apart?"

He'd said as much, but there was a little bit of quiet awe in her voice at that.

She laughed softly and leaned in to the hand cupping her face.

"Suddenly, it seems less important now. But I got a job. So I can help with the rent and our expenses."

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-04 03:48 am UTC (link)
He nodded promptly. "Yes," he replied.

It never occurred to him that it might have been strange or the opposite of what he was expected to do. Or even that Anna may have moved on in his absence. He'd still asked her, out of a desire to know and had been relieved when she'd informed him otherwise. Yet, those concerns had come about long after he'd gotten the ring. "I wanted to return to you. So much that I thought about little else when I was there."

Those people had not been his own. While many had been kind, he'd had his own Anna. His own Sam and Dean. As for the other version of himself, Cas was still uncertain of what to think on that front. Only that they shared few interests.

At her laughter, he returned a smile. Perhaps wider than usual, but still self-conscious. "It is important," he said, kissing her on the tip of her nose. "I'm very glad to hear. I've...been told it's difficult for females, due to discrimination against your gender."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-04 04:23 am UTC (link)
Anna couldn't help but smile at the way he summed up the situation so simply. There were times when Cas didn't get culture, but there were times when he could sum a situation up so concisely, so clearly.

"I'm doling out advice to the lovelorn in a column over at the paper," she said. "Not exactly hard-hitting journalism, but it'll do for now."

She was proud of herself for getting something, for being able to do more than just stay home and do the cooking and cleaning. She didn't have much patience for either of those. Maybe baking at times, but not putting together a complete meal.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-04 04:42 am UTC (link)
"I'm certain you'll be able to help others find mates," he replied simply. "You've taught me many things. And your advice is often helpful."

Of course, there were few instances he'd ever felt she was wrong. This was likely some form of bias speaking, but Cas was resigned to it. Anna had always been the calm, level-headed angel. It was why she'd been the leader of their garrison. And he'd never known her to be deceitful or mince words. The time he'd saved her from Michael was notwithstanding. She'd not been herself then.

"Perhaps you can use this as a means to enter into other forms of journalism. If they find your work impressive."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-06 12:33 am UTC (link)
Anna grinned at Castiel, both for the vote of confidence and for the fact that they thought alike on this one.

"That's kind of the plan." Her smile dimmed a little bit. "Assuming that we're here long enough for it, of course."

She didn't really expect that, but there was no telling what might happen.

She took his hand and twined her fingers through his, giving it a squeeze.

"And what about you? You'll be working downstairs behind the bar?"

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-06 01:29 am UTC (link)
"Yes," he replied simply, tugging her further into the apartment itself. "Three to four nights a week, though my schedule depends upon Johnny's. I will be opening on Thursdays. Fitting, though I doubt Harry is aware of that significance."

Being the angel of Thursday had always merely been a title for him. There were many other angels who shared that title. And if he recalled correctly, one of the first questions Dean had ever asked him was something along the lines of "Who's the poor bastard who got Monday?" To Cas, days were days and nothing more.

Currently, there were other matters on his mind. Some that definitely troubled him, but then he didn't feel any of the others would have noticed. With the exception of Anna of course, but then she wasn't quite as familiar with the Winchesters as he was. Adding that to the fact that Mary was having complications...it was likely none of his business yet he still found that he cared.

For the moment, focusing on his mate seemed like the appropriate course of action. Her smile put him at ease even when few other things did. "We'll be here for a while, or so I assume," he replied. "In that other reality, we spent months at sea with no deviation. While this is not the same...it's close enough. And there's more than enough for us to investigate in the meantime."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-06 02:37 am UTC (link)
Anna led the way over to the couch, wanting to settle in a bit. She stopped once they reached the couch and looked over at Castiel.

"What is there to investigate? The aliens, or are you referring to something more?"

The aliens were top priority, though she couldn't help but wonder if there were other mysteries for them to solve at the moment. It seemed that there was never a quiet moment and she supposed that she preferred it that way. If there was nothing to wonder about, life would seem... emptier, she believed.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-06 02:55 am UTC (link)
Sitting down beside her, Cas shrugged. "The extra-terrestrials are a concern," he admitted. "As is this city itself since I feel it's only a matter of time before it reveals its true nature in some form, but I'm also speaking of something I felt back during that meeting at Piotr's. Something I hadn't wished to discuss for fear of upsetting someone."

He knew he could trust Anna, however. He told her everything and she'd never once disclosed a secret. If they were also to be married, then he assumed it was yet one more reason to explain this to her.

"Did you...feel anything? When you came into contact with the boy by the name of Rob?"

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-06 03:38 am UTC (link)
<---- (moving over there)

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-06 03:37 am UTC (link)
Anna tried to remember who Rob was. She shook her head slowly.

"There were so many people at the meeting. I don't remember meeting Rob. What is it about Rob?"

Her interest was piqued now. If Castiel felt it was significant enough to mention, then there must be something about Rob.

"Who would be upset by this?" she asked slowly.

They had an odd group of people that were in on this situation with them. There were some that were like those they had known back home, but... not quite. Then there was a wide variety of others that came from various times and realities. She wondered about many of them and perhaps they were all mysteries to be unraveled at some point, but for now she would focus on this Rob.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-06 04:18 am UTC (link)
"Mary, for one," he said. "Or Jo. Likely Dean, though...he would more than likely only wind up blaming the wrong people for circumstances that are of this moment, unknown. For all I know, he could be from a different reality entirely."

Sighing, he leaned back against the cushions of the sofa and met Anna's eye. "Rob was the boy with the long hair. Another hunter. We...spoke briefly is all. And he is definitely human. That is not my cause for concern."

There was a distinct urge to simply lean over and lie down in Anna's lap. It had become something of a habit, particularly when a headache overtook him, and they happened frequently. Primarily when there was a subject he didn't know how to address. "He is a Winchester, Anna. And a Harvelle. He just isn't one of Dean's..."

That should have been enough. Or so he hoped. He did not believe Jo was adulterous. There was something else at work, yet that still posed several different options and none of them especially comforting.

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-06 04:31 am UTC (link)
Castiel had filled her in on who Mary was and how Mary was around at all. He'd mentioned that in this reality Jo Harvelle was alive and dating Dean. Her jaw dropped slightly at the implications of what he'd surmised about Rob.

"Another future Winchester child?" she asked and shook her head slowly. "I wonder if that family will ever see any peace."

She didn't believe that they would. Not with their bloodline and the traditions that had been passed down from generation to generation. All the same, it didn't stop her from hoping for it.

"Did Mary seem to know him? You would think that if he was a part of Mary's reality, she would know that she had a half-brother," she said sensibly.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-07 01:51 am UTC (link)
"Unlikely, considering his parentage," Cas replied somberly. "And that's assuming he himself is aware of it. I don't feel as if he is, but then, I'm not certain we should even ask him."

He didn't believe Jo would be unfaithful to Dean. But for her to be intimate with Sam was...something was strange there. He understood that most humans did not mate for life and in fact, had great difficulty in maintaining any form of enduring sexual bond whatsoever, but there had to be something there he wasn't seeing.

"Mary...Mary seemed aware of him. Beyond that, I highly doubt she's aware they share a mother. And Sam as both uncle and father respectively. For a brief moment, I'd thought it was Sam's presence I was feeling. Until I saw him."

If anything, he was yet another being to look after. The Winchesters were no longer his charges, but...apparently they still mattered to him.

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-07 03:23 am UTC (link)
Anna frowned, musing over the information and hypothesis that Castiel had.

"If Mary was aware of him but didn't seem to know that they were siblings, then I think it's safe to say that they're from different realities. Things could be very different in another reality. Perhaps Jo ended up with Sam in that reality."

She shrugged, not quite as perturbed at the possibility of Jo ending up with someone other than Dean. Perhaps because in her world, Jo had been dead for years and thus would have no children.

"I think that whatever the case, this is something that we need to let them figure out on their own. The truth will likely come out with time, but if you're the one to tell them... I don't think any of them will thank you for it."

The entire situation sounded like a tangled knot and Anna truly believed that it was better for those involved to be allowed to come to their own conclusions naturally, without their intervention.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-07 03:38 am UTC (link)
"That's what I would prefer," he pointed out. "Unless of course some kind of residual demonic essence made its way into Rob's genetic material. This would be through no fault of Sam's since I doubt anyone would think him capable of passing it on, but...I do feel the need to watch that closely. For more than one reason."

Leaning back heavily against the back of the sofa, he turned on his side and reached over to toy with a piece of Anna's hair. The time period demanded she style it, so it was not what he was used to. Nor was the monochrome vision a matter he appreciated, but it was still soft. "But then...I could merely be looking for something when there is nothing. This particular city seems to yield very little in the way of what we're accustomed to."

It made him restless. He hadn't been sleeping very much, which had been somewhat useful during their nights in the church, but now it would likely be difficult to hide. The urge to go out and seek confrontation was strong. Even though he was well-aware that he could hurt someone and had no real desire to do so. Unless that individual deserved it.

"But I do know one thing. You're here. With me. That is a very good thing."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-08 11:07 pm UTC (link)
Anna liked the sensations associated with Castiel playing with her hair. She let out a little contented sigh and leaned back against him, resting her head on his shoulder. Her fingers splayed across his chest, lightly tracing circles there. It was strange to think that they were home right now. Or at least, in a home that they could claim as their own for as long as they were here.

She tilted her face so she could look up at Castiel.

"I'm restless too. It's hard to find a way to stop fighting when you've been doing that in one way or another throughout your existence. But perhaps it's good that we have some downtime. We can get to know those within our group and figure out exactly who can be trusted."

Anna didn't trust easily. It was a side-effect of having those under her command turn on her after she'd fallen. She didn't blame them for it, but it had stung all the same. Loyalty was something that she still sometimes struggled with believing in, though Castiel had certainly shown it time and time again.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-09 02:18 am UTC (link)
When it came to an issue such as trust, Cas wasn't certain how to label himself. In many ways, he'd placed his trust in the wrong people. With Dean, it had simply been expecting his friend to rise to every challenge without considering that Dean was human. That had been Cas' own fault. As for Anna, he should have placed his trust in her long ago. In many ways, he still felt as if he were making up for lost time with her. Even before they'd been separated, there was still so much he would have liked to do with her. Now that it was apparent, at least.

"Speaking of which, I conversed with Johnny in order to get this job. Mary's...accomplice. As it may turn out, they are not mates. Though...the interest in mating is present in both of them. I don't understand their reasoning for not following through with it, but it seems to have something to do with their knowing one another in some future I was not aware of."

It did explain how Johnny seemed more temporally displaced than some of the others. Though...that matter was something he knew next to nothing about and had no desire to pry into it. He hadn't much liked Dean asking him if Anna was treating him right, after all. The answer to that question felt as if it should have been obvious.

Tracing senseless patterns over the bare skin of her arm, he met her eye as he spoke. "It would seem that Johnny is also a revenant. Yet he is not openly attacking whomever he pleases."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-10 02:17 am UTC (link)
Anna sat up at the revelation.

"He's a what?" She'd heard Cas just fine, she just didn't understand the way he was using the word in terms of Johnny.

"Mary's from the future. Are you trying to tell me that Mary knows Johnny in her future?"

She'd sensed some darkness around Johnny and a sense of death, but this... this was not what she would have imagined. It didn't fit with anything she knew about reanimated corpses seeking vengeance.

"Do you trust him?"

She put an awful lot of weight on Castiel's judgment, and so she wanted to know his true take on this.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-10 02:36 am UTC (link)
"Is that not what you would call a man who died and chose to return, willing to take his revenge on those who wronged him?"

Cas was aware of how it sounded and why Anna might be reluctant to trust Johnny. It did fit the profile of creatures they'd hunted in the past, though he'd spoken with the man at length. He felt that had to count for something. If Johnny had been of malicious intent, then either Mary or even Dean would have done something about it by that present time. "But yes. Mary is from the future. He said she knew who he was."

Yet on the matter of trust, he still needed to stop and consider it. He'd placed his trust in so many who had disappointed him before. And in this instance, he had no desire to see Mary experience similar, yet likely more powerful disappointment. "Yes," he said finally. "For now, I see no reason not to. He cares. About Mary. And I highly doubt he would step out of line because of her. But...time will obviously be a factor in determining whether or not he is a true ally."

Cas knew Anna trusted him. Yet...more often than not, she was the one who wound up being right.

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-10 03:58 am UTC (link)
Anna held her breath as Castiel thought on it. She had seen the way Mary looked at Johnny. And while she didn't feel the same emotional attachment or responsibility to Winchesters that Castiel did, the woman had taken him in without question and she felt a debt of gratitude to Mary for that. She didn't want to be the one to kill the man she was so fond of.

She was silent as she mulled over the information that had been supplied about the pair.

"Did they date in Mary's future?" she asked. "Clearly there are a feelings there and perhaps that's why both are hesitating to act on those feelings. If she has memories that he does not, well... they would be on uneven footing."

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-10 04:17 am UTC (link)
Cas frowned. "Mary only said that there were feelings already present," he pointed out. "She never said that...oh. Do you...do you believe that is possible?"

It made sense to Cas, at least regarding their temporal discrepancies. And Mary had always seemed reluctant to share specific details with him, which he'd never pushed for because he'd seen no reason to upset her or enter into a potential confrontation.

It was also a matter that made him uncomfortable. Not only was he uncertain if he liked the idea of someone mating with a female who was like family to him, but the idea of Anna not remembering their recent history together. And not being able to remember anything that had transpired between them...it was painful to consider. Suddenly, he understood the source of Mary's pain and he didn't like it. It was far worse than being on any cruise vessel with an alternate version of the person one loved.

That in and of itself was difficult, but not at all the same.

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-10 04:26 am UTC (link)
Was it possible? Anna fell silent for a moment as she pondered that.

"It's... I've never heard of such a situation, but I've also never heard of someone left in the past as long as Mary has. There also aren't many who go on after death and yet haven't succumbed to the darkness that usually follows."

It was simply a theory at the moment. A truly uncomfortable theory. She could only imagine that it was similar to what Castiel might have experienced in encountering another Anna who didn't remember their time together. She reached out and ran a thumb down the side of his face.

"I think that it could explain a lot of the tension between the two. If she remembers an entire history that he has yet to experience, that's certainly reason for the discomfort."

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-10 04:47 am UTC (link)
"Nor have I. But...I wish to believe that Johnny is an exception. I intend to watch him closely, but we were exceptions among our own kind. I feel the same can be applied to any species. Theoretically speaking."

It was all purely conjecture at the moment and while Cas disliked having to work in terms of the abstract, he knew they had little to no choice in regard to such things. Leaning into her touch, he sighed. "I...did feel similarly, but only at first," he replied, covering her hand with his own. "It quickly became apparent she was not you. And I highly doubt she could ever have compared."

But to see her in love with another...that part had been infuriating and painful to see. No matter what. She'd not fallen for him. Rather it seemed her interest was piqued by several others. That wasn't his Anna. It couldn't have been.

"Explaining her situation to Johnny...that could seem as if she's attempting to obligate him."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-10 11:56 pm UTC (link)
Anna moved then, curling up into Castiel's lap instead of at his side. She rested her head on his shoulder and draped an arm over him.

"I'm sorry that I wasn't there with you," she said quietly.

She thought that of the two of them, perhaps Castiel had had it worse. While at the time, she would have given anything for even a cheap imitation, she thought that now it would have just hurt more. She could only imagine that being around someone so similar who wasn't quite the person you wanted had to be agony.

She felt for Mary, if that was the situation that the Winchester daughter was dealing with. And she certainly felt for what her Castiel must have gone through in their time apart.

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[info]celestialintent
2013-07-11 01:32 am UTC (link)
Cas placed a kiss on her temple, helping her as she shifted and wrapped both arms around her waist snugly. "It was nothing you could help," he replied. "Though I am equally as sorry I left you without any form of notice. Yet...that is behind us. We will not be separated again."

He understood there was a chance that when another shift or relocation occurred a need to find her may arise. But he knew her and could sense the remnants of her Grace. Finding her was something he'd resolved to always do and she was the one he'd always come back to.

"And if there is another amusement park, then...we will find it. If one exists."

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[info]she_fell
2013-07-12 09:44 pm UTC (link)
Anna grinned up at her ever-thoughtful fiance. He did tend to remember things like that. She reached up and kissed him briefly.

"Who knows what we'll find? We have the opportunity to see other planets. Imagine what could be out there for us."

She still wanted to find a way home and there was more than a little fight left at the prospect of being at the mercy of a group of aliens, but the idea of all of the things they might see or experience while here.

She kissed Castiel again, more fervently this time. The time for talking had passed.

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