♔ small eyes, thick thighs (shoujo) wrote in lgbtq,
i have a lot of complicated feelings about coming out in general, so an entire day about it is kind of "????" in my brain. to put it semi-succinctly i would never take it away from anyone who has benefited from it, but i'm not out there advertising it either if that makes sense?
some half-formed thoughts:
1) i see a lot of unsolicited messages of support from non-queer people on social media on this day and while the intent is good, i agree with togetherinparis in that it creates kind of an expectation for "closeted" individuals to come out. in some cases it can even seem like a false blanket of comfort when actually coming out can be a dangerous and mentally taxing situation
2) the idea that "coming out" is a one-time thing and once you're out you'll never have to be in the closet again is a myth. the idea that we're always coming out really resonates with me (though i haven't read the article yet) because as a queer person i feel like we are always navigating spaces that default us to heteronormativity on some level
3) i feel like even though the general message of coming out day is like, hey it's safe to be yourself. it's very alienating for individuals who don't exist in a situation where it's safe to come out. as someone who wasn't necessarily closeted, but also didn't exist in a space where i could express queerness safely for most of my life i do feel a certain level of shame and guilt for NOT expressing my queerness or coming out when others around me were doing so
i feel myself rambling so i'm going to cut myself out, thanks for facilitating a space for this discussion!