Sir Integra (shestheashes) wrote in knowhereic, @ 2017-08-11 01:59:00 |
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Entry tags: | hellsing ultimate: canon: intregra |
Characters: Sir Integra Hellsing [Narrative]
When/Where: Romania/Friday
Rating/Warnings: Low (some mentions of violence/mentions of the previous trope plot)
Despite having finally adjusted to the odd rhythm of Knowhere and even with it's false sky she'd still missed the sun. And actual air, along with the sounds associated with a peaceful surroundings. It was odd to know how used to just the sound of everything one was until it was gone. She was highly tempted to purchase a noise maker. Everything was also aided by the fact that Romania had an impressive beauty to it.
London, England, and home would always be her favorites but when she'd gone there she'd tried finding the mansion only to find nothing in it's place. The Hellsing grounds were something different in this place, and it had thrown her for enough of a loop she hadn't quite enjoyed her stay there. She'd kept expecting to find the same things, while knowing she wouldn't, and it always threw her off. She hadn't even been able to go to where her family rested, because they weren't there. In the end it was London, just not her London.
She wondered if it was the same for Alucard in this place. She had only the references past down from her ancestors, and they'd stayed in England while keeping everything in trust. It was a shame really. The country had a beauty she found admirable. Peaceful, even. At least to her, but she'd woken with the sun and decided to just take advantage of it.
She also wondered what, exactly, she was expecting. Everything had the quiet peace of early morning and somehow it felt...not off or wrong just different. She questioned this as she picked up her cup of tea and finally decided probably bats. Or a red moon. Maybe she'd spend too much time with such things. That was more then likely the answer, considering normal felt oddly different. Probably the result of never having truly known it.
She sipped from the tea and tilted her head into the sun. Soon enough she'd have to go back to Knowhere, and she was determined to get as much out of this as she could. For a moment she closed her eyes and breathed in the calm and normal. In the end it'd bore her to tears, she was too much a creature of her circumstances, but right now it was nice. It also allowed her to think, and recall her memory. She'd retrieved everything, and would never want to go through losing and remembering everything again, but had odd worries she might forget something. So far, nothing had been forgotten but one had to make sure of these things. The only disadvantage was the odd sense of sadness and anger that crept over her in waves. Forgetting and then recalling a betrayal, death, and disappearance in the span of hours had felt too much like the first time. She'd had five years to deal with it, and it suddenly felt like she was dealing with it like it had just happened yesterday.
The wave of anger and sadness had her open her eyes and set the tea down with a touch more force then was strictly necessary. This was absurd. She had no reason or cause to react this way. It hadn't happened a few days ago, but rather five years ago. The monster had been put down, Walter's betrayal was not a matter worth considering, and even Alucard was fine. Well, physically. She could not attest for anything else, not even in normal circumstances, and she had no words to breach whatever he carried from the week where everything had gone sideways.
With a sigh she rose and strode to the balcony, setting her hands on it. Her new circumstances showed she was vulnerable. Too vulnerable. Even Alucard was, even with all his strength and with the magics of Hellsing. It was another thing that made her angry, but one she could deal with much better then the reminders of the Battle of London. More, because she felt vulnerable. There was no direct way to fight this. It coupled with the sense of feeling adrift she'd felt ever since she'd been pulled into Knowhere, the feeling of not knowing (directly) how to fulfill her duty.
There was no direct way to direct that. Her anger had always been that, a way to move forward, and she knew herself well enough that she knew others could provoke it. This time it didn't have any enemies and she'd let it blind her to the bigger picture. She would not do that again. So she reigned it in, focused it until she could find her path. One hand raised to her throat and she took the necklace and the cross from around her neck and let the silver glide through her fingers so she could think. Given her usual method was something she was trying to quit, this helped.
Slowly, time slipped and her mind set things in place. She found the first steps in the very things that were angering her before. It would require some maneuvering, but she had no doubt that with the right words she might be able to do it. Even without them, she could still manage. It would just make the budgeting a little harder, but she'd give the idea to Alucard. Despite anything, he did have more years, and could see some things she couldn't and form plans. And it would solve his problem of boredom, which would in trun solve her problem of whenever that turned into annoying her.
Smiling she set the necklace back over her neck. And they said vacations never included any work.