[Sighs out a little, making a soft sound when he applies more pressure, arching slightly]
[Manages a small shrug, though, seeming a bit self-conscious as he considers Aramis over his shoulder.]
I didn't want to tell him, here. [...] I'm supposed to come back - but it won't be for a very long time. He says he'll wait, but I'm...
[...] [shrugs again, trying to appear nonchalant even though he's anything but]
I'm terrified that he'd grow to resent me, for having to wait. So that he won't wait at all, and give up on me. And if he knew how I felt, he'd stay out of his sense of loyalty. But that he'd only grow to resent me, and hate me for having waited for someone who wasn't worth it, in the end.