Tony squints, trying to connect all the dots. But they all conflict and Steve doesn't seem to catch onto this even once.
"You know, SHIELD told me, when I was dying?" Wait does Steve even know about that. Whatever. "That I don't play well with others. That I could never be a team player. But you're the Army guy, you're supposed to have this unit thing in the bag. Do you even hear yourself?"
He had tried so hard, gone above and beyond for these people and do they appreciate him? No. He could live with that from Cap even if he could only see the flaw in his logic tbf.
"I'm not you. Otherwise you wouldn't need me. That's what being on a team is all about." He's earned this. Tony slowly sits up, leaning against the headboard and setting his jaw as he looks down at Steve. "But that doesn't mean I'm better than you. It means we have different strengths, different weaknesses. It means we work together. On everything. Not just stuff... you can't just decide this is too dangerous for me. I'm not your charge. You were still a popsicle while I was in Afghanistan. So don't you dare tell me who I am or what I can and can't do because you have no idea what I am capable of."
New York was but a mere taste of the lengths he will go to to protect them, and if it means yelling at Cap to get through to him then fine. Whatever it takes, he'll do.