Tweak

InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I am the lizard queen!"

Username: 
Password:    
Remember Me
  • Create Account
  • IJ Login
  • OpenID Login
Search by : 
  • View
    • Create Account
    • IJ Login
    • OpenID Login
  • Journal
    • Post
    • Edit Entries
    • Customize Journal
    • Comment Settings
    • Recent Comments
    • Manage Tags
  • Account
    • Manage Account
    • Viewing Options
    • Manage Profile
    • Manage Notifications
    • Manage Pictures
    • Manage Schools
    • Account Status
  • Friends
    • Edit Friends
    • Edit Custom Groups
    • Friends Filter
    • Nudge Friends
    • Invite
    • Create RSS Feed
  • Asylums
    • Post
    • Asylum Invitations
    • Manage Asylums
    • Create Asylum
  • Site
    • Support
    • Upgrade Account
    • FAQs
    • Search By Location
    • Search By Interest
    • Search Randomly

Keyleth ([info]burymyshame) wrote in [info]jurassiccitynet,
@ 2017-02-11 15:10:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:keyleth, kima of vord, percy de rolo, vax'ildan, vex'ahlia

Oh. So back here again. That makes sense.

It doesn't really but nothing makes sense. We were going to go to Marquet to give someone a hand. But sure. Back here instead. Why not.

My brain hurts. I think I broke it. Did you know they still let us drink for free in Whitestone? Or maybe Vex just talked them into free drinks. It's a little fuzzy.


(Post a new comment)


[info]pepperbox
2017-02-11 08:56 pm UTC (link)
Right. Yes. That hand.

So you went home then? Is Scanlan all right? We sort of got pulled back before we could do the ritual.

Are you all right? Do you need anything?

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-11 09:04 pm UTC (link)
Oh good. You're here.

Oh. Yes, but no? I mean he's alive. But he hates us and left. But he looks happy, maybe. Without us. Which is maybe saying something? I mean, maybe we're all just sort of in this knot of ... something that makes everything more miserable around us and we forget to even ask things like people's names. Like this little self-perpetuating bubble of something that we won't even notice until we go our separate ways.

I'm fine. I might throw up but that's just because I went through a tree to the wrong place, probably. And all the booze.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]pepperbox
2017-02-11 09:13 pm UTC (link)
I am.

Oh. I see. He just We've asked him things, about himself. We all have. And he never opened up. That isn't our fault. It's not our fault that he wouldn't stay.

Oh, Keyleth. Come on then, let's get you to bed. You should lie down until you feel better.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-11 09:33 pm UTC (link)
Is everyone else still here?

Did we? It feels like we failed him. We saved the world from fucking dragons but we still came up short. Maybe that should be our motto. We fail even when we win.

But I just got up.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]pepperbox
2017-02-11 09:38 pm UTC (link)
Yes.

We didn't fail him. He never let us help him. We tried. And he just didn't. And you know what? Fuck him. Fuck him for blaming us for his own fucking inability to let anyone in. That isn't our fault. It's not. We can't blame ourselves for every fucking thing. He was our family and he chose to leave us and it's not our fucking fault that he wouldn't stay. Because that's what family does! They die or they fuck off and anyone who tells you otherwise is bullshitting you.

Some days it's better just to not get out of bed. I'll stay with you. I don't really feel like getting out of bed myself.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-11 09:51 pm UTC (link)
Good. I think. Maybe we're happier here.

But I wasn't very good at letting anyone in, not truly. And I had Vax to keep trying, and then you and the others and I got better at it, and I think you did after we all came to Whitestone, and maybe Scanlan just didn't have any of us try enough. He felt alone, and I think we should have ... thought of that. And we didn't. Because he's Scanlan. I don't know. I have a headache.

He fucked off WITH the family he wants to be with right now, I think. Maybe that's what he needs. I really don't like that those are the only options if you're family.

All right. The beds here are really nice, and the toilets are much better for throwing up.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]pepperbox
2017-02-12 06:29 pm UTC (link)
I think we are. I hope we are. I think a bit of it is not nearly dying every three days.

He was too good a liar. He was a shitty fucking liar and he never let us in. We let him in, we let him see us, and he never did that. And we tried. But he never wanted our help. And it is not our fault that he didn't. Just like it's not our fault that he left us at the first opportunity. We cared about him and it isn't our fault that he didn't feel the same.

Let him go off with his shit daughter. Maybe he'll finally figure out how to treat her like a person instead of an ideal. Because she's just as much of a fuck up piece of shit as him or you or me or any of us. They can fucking have each other. They are, Keyleth. I hate it, but they are. Either you leave or one day you die but family doesn't last forever.

Come on, then. Let's just go back to bed.

Fuck Scanlan.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 06:55 pm UTC (link)
That is a nice change. Though going by recent events, we might fall apart when we're not worrying about dying tomorrow.

We still care. I still care. He's shitty and terrible but he's also our friend and sometimes he's amazing, and he's saved all of our lives. It might not be our fault, but I think I could have done more, too.

You're not wrong, but do we have to say it like that?

I didn't think of it like that Percy. Or I did and then I didn't. Are we just marking time with each other until more of us leave then? Should we stop?

I'm coming. Vax is coming too, and maybe bringing the others.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]daggerdagger
2017-02-11 09:24 pm UTC (link)
What?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-11 09:37 pm UTC (link)
Oh good, you too.

Which part? Scanlan's alive, but he left with Kaylie. He's safe, though. Everyone is safe. That's something.

Hi.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]daggerdagger
2017-02-11 09:43 pm UTC (link)
I think we're all still here. The ones of us that were before. I think Lyra and Gern might be gone, but they're probably better off back home anyways.

I guess that's more than any of us expected. But I can't... He wouldn't just leave like that. Hate us? He doesn't... He can't...

Can I come with you and Perc? I know you guys like to do your own thing sometime, and I don't want to butt in on that. But can I come this time?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-11 09:58 pm UTC (link)
I hope they're safe back there then. Though honestly I'm a little freaked out by necromancy related things right now? So maybe Gern not being here is better, for the moment. Not that all necromancers are the same, but dead things have tried to kill us a lot lately. Kerr's not here is he?

He was ... very angry, Vax. And very hurt. But I think he just needed to be away for a while too. Maybe not forever, but for now. He thinks we didn't need him, and I don't know how he could think that, but he was really certain about it.

Maybe he doesn't hate us, but it felt like he didn't want to forgive us, either.

No, that's fine. Come with us. I don't want any of us to be alone.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]daggerdagger
2017-02-11 10:13 pm UTC (link)
He's not. Pike hasn't shown up yet, either. Or Scanlan. But I guess... maybe that's not going to happen now.

How could he... We'd be dead ten times over without him. He's kept us sane in situations we should have fallen apart in. How could he think we don't...

Maybe we should go grab Vex and Grog, too.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-11 10:22 pm UTC (link)
It still could. Maybe he'll bring Kaylie.

I don't know. I don't understand it, Vax. He talked about it like he wasn't really one of us. I just wish I'd known, so I could have said the right thing. Or that I'd known so that I could tell Vex or Pike and they could say the right thing.

I'd be fine with that, too.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]daggerdagger
2017-02-12 01:09 am UTC (link)
I don't know, Kiki. I just don't know. I think right now, we all just need to go somewhere and sit together.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 02:25 pm UTC (link)
Right. Let's do that. And maybe not talk too much.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]ofvord
2017-02-12 01:06 am UTC (link)
That's just typic That asshole Apparently, the last time I hit him, I didn't do it hard enough.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 02:27 pm UTC (link)
You hit really hard Kima, so you probably did. He was just hurt.

Not by you hitting him, other than that it probably did hurt, but hurt in his feelings.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-11 11:40 pm UTC (link)
I can always talk people into free drinks.

Are you okay, darling?

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 02:24 pm UTC (link)
I know you can. It's because you're so cool. You're just Vex, and it happens.

I'm fine. I'm not fine-fine, but I'm fine enough, I guess? Everything just feels wrong. Are you okay?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 03:08 pm UTC (link)
Oh darling, I'm not that cool.

I know. I'm the same way. Fine but not fine. I don't really know what to do with myself.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 03:31 pm UTC (link)
That's why you are though! You don't even have to try. It's just you.

Right. Everyone is alive and we won so we should be fine but then it doesn't feel fine. Are you hungover? Or are you not from the same time as I am? That gets so confusing here.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 03:52 pm UTC (link)
You're so very sweet.

It doesn't feel fine at all. None of this is. I'm always hungover. I know. I think I'm a day before you, or so. We went to bury that box. That's the last I remember.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 04:01 pm UTC (link)
I just wish I was that cool.

Oh. Right. Well things happened after that. But that part mostly went fine?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 04:07 pm UTC (link)
You are.

I read. I'm not even sure what to say. I really don't want any of us to be apart. I guess I understand why he went, but I don't have to like it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 04:58 pm UTC (link)
I have moments? Maybe it's from being around you so much.

I want him to be happy. I just want happy to be with us.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 06:43 pm UTC (link)
Yes, you do. I think we all rub off on each other quite keenly.

Me too. I understand he was angry. And dying twice is a hell of a thing, but.. yeah.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 06:58 pm UTC (link)
We're each others' bad and good influences?

We've all said things when we're upset. But he was still feeling like that, all along, and we didn't know. I hate that.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 07:28 pm UTC (link)
Precisely.

It's not on us to make him open up. No one can force anyone to talk about things they don't want to. Maybe he'll get stuck here and then we can ignore him. See how he likes it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 08:53 pm UTC (link)
Oh, that'd be good. I probably wouldn't manage for that long, and Scanlan is hard to ignore usually. He's so charming even when he shouldn't be? But if he was here he couldn't leave and maybe we could work things out. Kaylie would probably love it here. There's so many different flavors of vodka.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 09:27 pm UTC (link)
I'm pretty good at the silent treatment. But you're right. Maybe he would like it here, because there's usually not a lot of horrible things happening. Usually. And lots of vodka.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 11:04 pm UTC (link)
Oh, you are. And you have the really good face you make when you're angry at someone and don't say anything and just want them to wither. It's really impressive.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 11:14 pm UTC (link)
Thank you, Keyleth. You're doing such a good job at buttering me up.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]burymyshame
2017-02-12 11:44 pm UTC (link)
You're welcome. Unless that was sarcasm.

Do you want to come spend some hungover time in a quiet room with Vax and Percy and me?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 11:55 pm UTC (link)
No, not sarcasm.

By hungover time, do you mean getting drunk again?

(Reply to this) (Parent)

vex'ahlia.
[info]pepperbox
2017-02-12 06:33 pm UTC (link)
I'm so angry with him. I'm just so very angry with him.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

percy
[info]huntersmark
2017-02-12 06:44 pm UTC (link)
He's such a little shit.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

Home | Site Map | Manage Account | TOS | Privacy | Support | FAQs