Suikoden V (Arshtat/Ferid) [week 1, prompt 1]
Title: Like Going Mad Author: Sister Coyote Rating: PG Warnings: Spoilers Word Count: 500 Summary: When the Rune took over, it was like nothing else, like fire in her veins, like staring into the sun, going blind, going mad, giving herself over to an alien power that was both her ally and her enemy.
Arshtat had very little warning before an episode took hold of her; most frequently the trigger was upsetting news, but at times she could hear extremely unpleasant things without faltering – and at other times a trifle would set her off. When the Rune took over, it was like nothing else, like fire in her veins, like staring into the sun, going blind, going mad, giving herself over to an alien power that was both her ally and her enemy.
In such moods Ferid was the only one who could talk her down, and she was grateful beyond speaking that he had won the Sacred Games in his own names, and not for another. Only a man who could look death in the face himself would dare stay at her side during her mania.
This time she came to herself in her own chambers, lying on her counterpane, with the window open to the cool air and an ewer of water beading on the side table. Ferid sat at her side, fingertips gentle on her hair, a cool cloth in one hand, and she realized then that he had been bathing her forehead even as she blazed with the power of a True Rune.
"I remember," she said, and touched a hand to her forehead, "I remember telling the councilor that I would burn him where he stood if he dared to question my authority again. I – how much have I lost?"
"A handful of minutes only. I believe we have convinced the councilor that you were suddenly ill of a fever, and did not know what you said." He put the cloth aside and took her hand between his. "I am most concerned for you. This is the second time since the moon was full last."
"I know," she said. She wanted badly to tell him that it would be all right, that she would master the rune rather than allow it to master her – the words were on her lips – and yet she could not lie. Did not lie. "It is a burden I must bear, and I will try to bear it with greater fortitude. But – " How to explain it, the fever, the sense of being elevated, lifted into the sky, high above mere humans? How to explain the way the power sang and whispered within her, tempting her to greater heights.
He touched the hair at the back of her neck lightly again, and then, daring, touched the mark of her rune. To her relief, it did not waken. "I will stay by your side. I cannot bear it for you, but I will do what I can to ease the weight on you."
She turned his hand toward her and kissed his palm, and said, "I pray only that it will be enough." She did not speak the other thought in her heart, which was that she prayed, perhaps even more strongly, that staying beside her would not cause him to come to grief himself.