Caleb Tate, channeler extraordinaire (synergistic) wrote in invol_rpg, @ 2013-04-06 23:01:00 |
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Entry tags: | ! log, allegra hawke, caleb tate |
WHO: Allegra Hawke and Caleb Tate
WHAT: Talking about the Vol Squad
WHEN: Wednesday, April 3, after the first meeting [BACKDATED]
WHERE: A walk on the grounds
WARNINGS: none
STATUS: complete
Allegra looked at the man on her right curiously, wondering what he was making of it all -- she could read his emotions, sure, but as betraying as they were, it was like putting together a puzzle with only the corner and edge pieces. The bulk of the picture was still missing. "Tired yet?" she queried as the initial Vol Squad dinner thinned out and the room emptied out. "I was thinking of taking a walk before I head back to my room." “A walk’d be good, yeah,” Caleb said, just as curious about what Allegra was thinking as she was of him. He’d gone into this with some apprehension, after his talk with Daisy and Hunter, but today had seemed just as benign as he’d originally anticipated it would be. A little reassured, he was trying to ignore the nagging doubt his earlier conversations had implanted, but talking it out would help, he thought. As they left the buildings of the main campus behind them, Caleb took her hand, giving it a little squeeze. “So what’d you think?” "So far, it sounds good?" she began as they walked. "It's just weird, you know, to be partnering up with IVF again." The last time she'd done it out of necessity. In the face of friends being kidnapped, one could hardly cite a general dislike for being locked up and having their initial life plans ruined as a reason to not want to assist. And the event had altered her perspective somewhat on the IVF in general -- she'd had a fairly decent working relationship with Haddon, after all. But could she trust them? And had they been given all the information they needed? Were the ulterior motives and plans? She didn't know. Was she an idiot for signing up, or was this the best way to proactively combat the image projected of her kind? “Yeah,” Caleb said, a little uncomfortable at the reference to the kidnappings. His experiences had rattled him more than he’d expected, and even though he’d sign up for something similar again if people he cared about were at risk, he couldn’t see himself volunteering on a regular basis. The military definitely wasn’t for him. “I know Wolfe is... well, Wolfe, but the Swans seem to really like Li, and it looks like she’s just as involved as him, so I took that as a good sign. I wasn’t expecting that. I guess we’ll know more on Sunday, though,” he added, thoughtfully. Having a team leader like Wolfe, a power like Allegra's, and a generally distrustful disposition when it came to adults in authoritative positions meant that there was no one on the IVF payroll, not even Li, that Allegra wouldn't scry for discrepancies in what they said and how they felt. "I don't totally trust any of them," she confessed. This was hardly news. "But if all I did was refuse to do things because I don't trust people, I'd never leave my room." “I know Ally,” Caleb said, almost amused. Even if he didn’t full-out like her trust issues, he was getting used to them, at least. And they weren’t always a bad thing. “But it’s good to have you balance me out since I trust everyone. But I’m willing to give them the benefit of the doubt now, and I know that you and Mette will be able to tell if things aren’t on the up-and-up. And assuming it is legitimate, I’m glad that we’ll get the opportunity to do good. And travel. And hopefully better represent Vols.” "It would just be better if we could create our own organisation. One that doesn't involve terrorism or three drink tickets once a week," Allegra interposed wistfully. “I think we’re getting close?” Caleb said hopefully. “Or, if not close, I think it’s in our future, at least. I mean, they had to wait until we were old enough to have our own leaders, but we’re definitely getting there - the oldest of us turn 23 this year. And really, maybe that’s part of what IVI is about? What if they want to observe us to see how we respond - are we mature enough that we can be trusted to make our own decisions, things like that. And obviously there are going to be mixed results - for every Nawal there’s going to be a Devon. But still, I’d hope that we can prove ourselves if that’s the case. I mean, aside from the fact that it’s ridiculous that we should have to prove ourselves. But I just don’t think they’re ready to see us as adults yet, since we started out as 14 and 15 and 16 year olds with superpowers. So I think it’s going to take time.” Even as she chewed over the words, Allegra found herself still caught between the strange tension of calling herself a Vol and wanting to just be seen as human, wanting the best of both worlds without having to endure the inevitable struggle. "Ugh. I'm not patient enough for that." “Yeah,” Caleb said, with a halfhearted laugh. He’d started out more patient than most of his peers, but IVI had taught him to be moreso. Mostly because there wasn’t really much else he could do. “I don’t know that we’ll have much of a choice, though, hun,” he said, giving her hand a squeeze. "There goes my plans for world domination before 30." Caleb grinned and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand. “Before 40, though, is totally still possible.” They walked in comfortable silence for a bit while Caleb tossed around a question he’d been meaning to ask in his mind. Now seemed as good a time as any, he finally convinced himself. “Daisy’s post got me thinking, though. And what we talked about the other day. But, if they let us out of here, say, tomorrow, what would you do? Finish school, I know, but then what? What would your next five years be like?” "I don't know," she replied, a little caught off-guard by his question. Five years was hardly a time frame she like to plan out in advance. Maybe a few months at a time, but years? No. Definitely not. "Finish uni, get a job -- preferably at some big multinational, transfer somewhere overseas for a couple of years and then come back? Oh and move out next to the beach. Maybe Manly, that's a fun place." “Yeah,” Caleb said, unsurprised by her answer. They’d talked about most of those things before, and it was one of the things that had made him so interested in her, since many of them were things that he wanted too. And logically, he’d known that Allegra wasn’t the kind to think about her relationships in future terms, but it still would have been nice to get some hint of him in that. A ‘we’ or an ‘us’ or a ‘you’ - either tentatively or casually. But some sort of acknowledgement that the idea of them being a them had crossed her mind. He should have known better though. “That makes sense.” "Why? What would your next five years be like?" “Similar,” Caleb said, shrugging. “Though I always kind of figured living abroad would be more working-holiday than transferring with a multinational.” Which probably highlighted some of the differences between them, to be honest. Their backgrounds, in some ways, were completely different, and lately he’d wondered what that could mean for them in the long run. After all, she owned a </i>flat</i> and hadn’t ever mentioned having a job to pay for said flat, while Caleb had worked his way through uni in order to rent one with two friends. But completely contrasting backgrounds weren’t enough of a reason to throw in the towel. Not by itself, at least, and especially not when they were on the same page about so many other things. “But I also,” he started tentatively, and then stopped himself. Taking a more lighthearted tone, he hoped that would help minimize the anxiety coming from him. “Anyways, we already knew you copied all my ideas.” It was instinctual to ask what was wrong as soon as she felt the prick of second-hand anxiety, but one that after all these years, she had grown accustomed to swallowing down. "Liar, you copied all of mine. I remember this argument." “Your take on this argument was always flawed. Just because you said I was the one stealing your ideas doesn’t mean it’s true.” "But it was true!" she protested with a giggle. "I get you think I'm amazing, Caleb, but really. Enough is enough." “I do, you know,” Caleb said, serious again as he wrapped an arm around Allegra’s waist and pulled her in. He pressed a quick kiss to her temple before releasing her. “Think you’re pretty great.” "Me too." “I know,” he replied with a small smile. And that really ought to be enough - for now, at least. Did it matter if she didn’t think of her future in terms of both of them? She might eventually. And if she never did... well, he could deal with it then, couldn’t he? Jumping ahead to a breakup when he wasn’t even sure they had an expiration date didn’t make sense. He needed to be okay with the moment. “Head back, you think?” She nodded, a query still on the tip of her tongue, but beaten down. For now. He'd talk when he was ready. |