The small, childish, petulant part of her wanted to tell him that he did not understand, not at all, but she swallowed down that urge. It was petty, and perhaps even cruel, and she wasn't that person. It was just picking a senseless fight with her friend, and Lily sighed heavily as she tried to push the thoughts away.
That was getting harder, and they never strayed very far, always seeming to hover around the edge of her consciousness, taunting her, filling her with doubts.
Instead, she walked along in silence for a bit as she tried to straighten herself out. "Sorry," she finally managed. She was mostly apologizing for her unspoken thoughts, but also for pouring it out on hiim like that to begin with. It was her issue, and she didn't need to make a downer of herself every time they were together. "I just ... it comes and goes. Somedays it's worse, and some days I can ... almost forget."
Her lips quirked into a tired half-smile as she glanced over to him. "I just don't know how to live like this and stay sane," she murmured.