InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Why am I always Lois Lane?"

Lily Evans (emerald_eyes) wrote in indarkness_logs,
@ 2010-10-01 23:15:00

Entry tags:

!complete, 2032 10, lily evans, sir didymus

RP: A Moment to Breathe
Characters: Lily E, Sir Didymus
Time/Date: Evening, October 1 (what? It's a happenin' time)
Location: Outside
Warnings/Rating: None
Summary: Lily tries to relax
Status: Complete

Lily had been playing catch up for most of the day. She'd slept most of the weekend prior, and then they'd been flung into music that made conversation impossible. Jaime had been reconciling with Mal and coming to terms with her near-suicide, and Tyler ... she wasn't sure what was going on with Tyler, exactly. He seemed okay, but quieter than usual.

Then there'd been the inexplicable change of Remuses, and then finally, blissfully, the music had shut down. So she (and she reasoned most of the others) had taken a very long nap. She'd risen for dinner, and then with nothing pressing to do (and needing a bit of time to herself), she'd sought out some place of refuge.

The library, kitchen, and rec room were all occupied. Swan had been out in the garden. She didn't want to hang out in her room, didn't want to go bother Balthazar (who may well still be sleeping), she didn't really want to be around most people. If she hadn't thought she'd have been bothering him, she might have stopped in to see what Sev was up to, but ... he was probably looking for peace and quiet as much as (if not more than) any of the others here.

So Lily had ventured outside. She could have gone up to the roof, she knew, but ever since the blizzard incident, she'd been ... skittish about going up there. After all, Susan wasn't here to save them this time. That sent an unexpected pang through her, and she'd detoured to the grave markers. It was hard to believe they'd all been gone for ... over a month now. Lily had spent a few moments standing by the markers and simply remembering the ones who'd fought and fallen before she'd turned away.

She'd wandered down to the line (but not over it) and she'd waved to Jake and Oy when she saw them heading in.

Still at something of a loss, Lily had wandered over to the convenience store and settled down in front of it, resting her back against the wall. It was nice like this, out here in this false world, enjoying the complete and utter lack of noise. If someone happened by looking for the same, she wouldn't mind the company ... but she'd also be perfectly content to simply ... be here.

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sir_didymus
2010-10-02 05:07 pm UTC (link)

He and Ambrosius had run out of kibble once more. Though Didymus did not mind supplementing their diet with the occasional tidbit of the humans' food, he did not wish to rely on such entirely. Not after the incident with the bacon, and Ambrosius's subsequent illness. So he steered his steed toward the store to obtain another bag, and when he drew nearer, he saw the Lady Lily sitting just outside the building.

"Good eve, milady," Didymus called to her, inclining his head when they were closer. "And how dost thou fair this fine and peaceful eventide?"

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emerald_eyes
2010-10-02 06:19 pm UTC (link)

"Evening, love," she replied softly as she lifted her head to regard him. Pushing her hair back out of her eyes, she smiled gently (if a bit tiredly) toward him.

"I'm enjoying the lack of racket," Lily admitted as her smile shifted into a grin. "It's very nice to be able to speak to the others at normal conversational volumes without having to shout about everything.

"And how are you and Ambrosius this evening?"

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sir_didymus
2010-10-02 07:48 pm UTC (link)

"We are both well," Didymus answered, dismounting as he prepared to lead Ambrosius the rest of the way. "Indeed, the absence of the previous clatter is cause to celebrate," he added, ears suddenly perking up at the joyful silence. But then he looked up at Lady Lily and frowned.

"Alas, thou appearest weary, still," he observed, giving her a sad smile. Ambrosius approached, as well, laying his head upon the maid's knee with a concerned whine. "Hast sleep eluded thee still?"

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emerald_eyes
2010-10-02 07:59 pm UTC (link)

"Good," she murmured in response to the fact they were both doing well. When Ambrosius rested his head on her knee, Lily moved her hand to stroke his head and scratch lightly behind his ears.

"I just have a lot on my mind, I suppose," she admitted. "It's quiet now, granted, and we'll likely have the weekend free of trouble, because that seems to be their pattern. But what about next week? Or the week after, or the one after that? We can only take so much, really, before we start to fall apart at the seams."

Lily was strong, yes, and she had a good network of friends here, but she was still only human. She had a breaking point, and if she was forced to it, what then? What happened when she broke? Jaime had nearly lost her life to the dementors, and Lily still didn't think the girl was 100% back to a good mental place. Without each other to lean on completely, did they even make a very good triad anymore?

Then there was the entire situation of her current love-life, but she didn't really want to start thinking about that just now. It was complicated, and she still felt sick when she thought about the way she'd ended things with James, even if she was fairly certain she'd done the right thing in that regard.

Truthfully, she just wanted to go home. At least the war was more predictable than this, and the unpredictability was grating on her, wearing her down.

"I had a nap," she replied belatedly to his question about sleep as she slipped out of the daze her thoughts had driven her to. "And I imagine I'll be able to sleep tonight."

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sir_didymus
2010-10-02 11:30 pm UTC (link)

Ambrosius whined again, turning his head to lick at Lady Lily's forearm, in order to comfort her. As for his part, Didymus did not know how to answer such things. He had been of no help at all when the Dementors had been there, and he certainly could not have helped with the loud music. Other than doing his best to keep Ambrosius from howling and only adding to the din.

He nodded when Lady Lily said that she would sleep that night, but then he shook his head, one shoulder lifting in shrug. "We must needs rely on our brethren," he said, and then shook his head again. "Even thou must, milady. Thou canst not shoulder such an immense burden alone."

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emerald_eyes
2010-10-02 11:45 pm UTC (link)

She wasn't generally prone to depression. She didn't wear it well at all, and it didn't suit her. "I know," she admitted when he said they needed to rely on the others. "I get a bit ahead of myself though, and when the others are suffering as badly -- or worse -- why should I add to their burdens?"

Lily supposed she'd run herself into the ground before this was all said and done, one way or another. Three and a half months of this torture, with no end in sight ... it was becoming harder and harder to find the bright spots, the silver linings, the lights at the end of the tunnel.

Jaime had once said they weren't making it out of here alive. Lily had protested then, but now she seriously wondered.

"You've been doing all right though? Settling in, making friends, things like that?" She smiled slightly to Didymus as she continued to stroke Ambrosius' fur, appreciating the comfort the dog was attempting to offer.

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sir_didymus
2010-10-03 01:44 am UTC (link)

"Then thou must seek aid from those who can provide, to rely on them until thy strength ist renewed," Didymus answered, shaking his head. Mayhap he but a simple fox, but it made sense to him. "I commend thy fortitude thus far, milady, but we all stumble and fall at times, and we all will need a hand up." He offered her a kind smile, and reached out to pat her hand with his paw.

When she asked if he had been all right, Didymus tilted his head to one side, shrugging again. Apart from cowering in the bottom of his closed when the Dementors were here ... "I cannot complain," he finally answered with a shake of his head.

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emerald_eyes
2010-10-03 02:34 am UTC (link)

She nodded. The trouble was, it wasn't like she could exactly go about asking anyone to ... play welcome wagon. If they were fortunate though, it wouldn't be much of an issue. Maybe they wouldn't get any new people for a little while. She really did hate when new people showed up.

But she hated it even more when people mysteriously vanished, whether or not they were replaced. Her thoughts shifted to the first Remus, and she wondered if he was home and safe, or if he was trapped somewhere being experimented on.

"Oh, I'm sure you could complain," Lily replied with a soft, almost playful smile. "Fairly certain all of us have at least a couple of complaints to voice."

She realized then that he might have been interrupting him from something and she tilted her head. "So were you just out for a walk or were you on a mission?"

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sir_didymus
2010-10-03 04:20 am UTC (link)

"Thou art correct," Didymus said, shaking his head with a chuckle. "What I meant, fair maiden, was that I have little more to complain about than the others here."

When she asked if he was on a mission, his eyebrows contracted momentarily before he smiled. "Thou couldst say so. Ambrosius and I have exhausted our supply of kibble and must procure another sack if we are to dine this eve."

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emerald_eyes
2010-10-03 05:00 am UTC (link)

Lily wondered why she'd never really considered what Didymus ate. Her brows lifted slightly, but he was in essence a canine, wasn't he? So why shouldn't he snack on food meant for canines? She wondered if Lucky would consider making them separate meals. Dogs ate meat as well, right?

"Have you ... ah. Is that what you ate at home? Kibble? Because I'm sure we could set aside some meat for the two of you at meal times. Beef or chicken or something of that sort," she suggested. But if he liked the kibble, who was she to try to change his ways?

"I can help you carry it in, if you'd like," she offered to him. It wasn't as though she was doing anything, nor did she really have any thing super-pressing to do just then.

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sir_didymus
2010-10-03 05:28 pm UTC (link)

"We ate squirrels, birds, lizards, sometimes rabbits -- whatever we could scent and catch," Didymus answered with a slight shrug. Their kibble could hardly compare to real meat -- especially that which they had felled themselves -- but it wasn't enough to keep their bellies full, and that was all he asked.

When Lady Lily offered to help him carry the sacks, however, Didymus shook his head. "I could not ask such of thee, milady," he answered, frowning. "Not when thou art already weart. Ambrosius and I can manage the sack on our own, but I do thank thee for thy kind offer."

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emerald_eyes
2010-10-03 11:51 pm UTC (link)

"It isn't ... a bother," she assured him. But perhaps it was a matter of pride. If he couldn't catch his own food here, at least he could fetch it from the store himself. "But if you're sure, then I'll leave you to your task," she concluded.

She thought perhaps she'd try setting aside some chicken for them for meal times all the same, and see if that caught on. Maybe she'd ask Lucky to do the same; surely with both of them setting aside cuts of meat for Didymus and Ambrosius, they'd at least try it ...

Satisfied with that, Lily smiled softly to the small fox and his dog.

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sir_didymus
2010-10-04 02:55 pm UTC (link)

"Mayhap some other time," Didymus answered with a smile, and then he continued to the door of the store before whistling to Ambrosius. His steed looked between him and Lady Lily for a second or two, as if he didn't wish to leave her alone, but finally he trotted over to the door.

"Come, boy," he added, opening the door. "I thank thee again, milady," he added before they stepped inside.

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emerald_eyes
2010-10-04 03:47 pm UTC (link)

Lily lifted her hand in a wave, but she was perfeclty content to continue to sit here and enjoy the quiet while they went about their business.

Tipping her head back against the wall, she let her eyes drift slowly closed. This wasn't a real world, and she knew they were essentially just inside a giant building of some sort, but even so, the breeze of recycled air was nice, and the faint sounds of the water lapping the distant shore were soothing.

One way or another, she reasoned they'd all get through this.

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