Matt
It was a sloppy fight. I still hear her begging when I lay down, but if I'd given her that moment, she would have just been in pain. It's like when you go hunting. If you don't one-shot a deer. But I mean, there's not a good way to die.
I want to talk to her about it at some point, but, it's kind of an elephant in the room.
I wasn't planning something like that. I mean, I am sorry but was planning to go more specific maybe? It's hard to really say "I'm sorry for killing you" you know? And say that maybe, fear of death and an unnatural and vindictive environment convinced me to focus on an offensive survival tactic, but that I don't think that excuses my actions and that I want to do better and that I should have.