What if I told you that I am trying to use this opportunity to change? That I'm working with someone here to throw off external control but that I can't make it public knowledge because of who else is here with me? What if I told you that I have plans to make things as right as they can be when I go home, after this experience, after having time away to think about what I truly want and who I want to be?
You wouldn't believe me. No one here would.
Like I will continue to say, my behaviour doesn't need to change. I haven't done anything I wasn't provoked into doing, either by actual violence, the threat of violence, or the threat of external control over my actions. I can try to control my anger but, like I've told Hank, it's next to impossible with people constantly provoking me. Like I told Hotel, it's next to impossible without my connection to the Force so I can meditate inward to avoid exploding outward.
There is someone here who could regulate me but she- that doesn't seem to be an option, as hard as I try.