Harry Potter (marked_to_live) wrote in impetuousrpg, @ 2011-11-02 14:51:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | char: harry potter, char: susan bones |
Who: Harry Potter and OPEN
Where: Three Broomsticks
When: Wednesday
What: Harry's quietly breaking.
Rating/Status: PG-13 for potential language | In Progress and very much open.
Harry slammed his fist hard into the wall ahead of him. Anger, sadness, it all bellied up inside of him as he read the journals. He had to remember to be who he was, to remain strong and force his way through the worse this world had to throw at him. He hated feeling this pathetic, this emotional, but it was getting so hard. The person whom he loved more than anything wanted nothing to do with him, all because of some stupid coward who had to go and steal her right to live from her. He knew in time Ginny would fix herself, but he was beginning to think he'd never play a part in that life again.
He was getting so tired of everything he said in public being scrutinized, or when he asked for advice no one was there to respond or help. He didn't blame them, they had their entire lives; it just felt, for Harry, that everything in his case was slipping away. For the first time in his life, he literally felt alone. He was missing Sirius, and his parents, more today than he had ever in his life. His friends were slipping away, Ginny was slipping away, and he was going to be left with a job that was turning on everything he'd fought for. He'd leave the job, then what? He'd be further on the path to self-destruction.
He rubbed at his temples, he had that tired look again. That same look he'd had since the days with Voldemort. He couldn't stop worrying, not for himself; but for those he loved, for everything that was going on, and the fact that he could do nothing for them because they didn't want him to. He'd love them, until the day he died, even if it wasn't reciprocated. He felt hot tears in his eyes as he stared at the wall ahead of him, his mind trying to comprehend everything that was going on.
He wiped them away though and took in a deep breath. Deciding to push away the heart ache, he instead chose to pull himself together. He wasn't allowed to break like this, it was weak. He had to be stronger. So he pushed himself to his feet, and took in another breath and composed himself. Throwing on his robes, he moved for the door and stepped free of it. When he vanished, he reappeared at the Three Broomsticks, figuring that at least this place wouldn't be too busy. At least compared to The Leaky, and he could get a drink and begin to put things in order again. Try to figure how to better the life around them all, rather then wallowing in it.
He moved inside of the Broomsticks and pulled the warm robes around him further as he looked around and began to take in what patrons he could see. Then moved towards the bar counter, figuring a Firewhiskey would surely help.
He didn't care how hard any of this got, it wouldn't take away his love. He'd be the person he needed to be in the end, he knew that. He just had to make sure not to let it break him, because that would be selfish. They were going through a much tougher life than he was.