Other than a bite on her lip, Rae tried not to wear her heart on her sleeve too much. But his suggestion that it was nothing made her shake her head. "It's still something," she told him. "Anything is something." Which was stupid, and possibly telling of how much she actually loved him, but it was what it was. "I knew people like that in the past," she told him seriously. And it pained her to think of him there. He didn't deserve it.
"You're lucky," she told him with a little laugh. "I can't think of a better set of friends at a time like this." She paused. "I mean, I lucked out pretty heavily with Kori and my cousins, but for you... you lucked out, too." He pointed out the humor in the situation and she couldn't hold back a little chuckle. "It shows how different the world is now than it used to be. How the apocalypse is a hell of an equalizer." She didn't often think about this, but if things were the way they used to be? They probably would have never met. It was an unpleasant thought, too, with how much she loved him now.
He definitely understood her look, and it made her grin a little bit, in spite of how unimpressed she'd been. Yelling and whining. She nodded. "That's a good sign." A strange thing to say, given the circumstances, but she knew he'd understand. He was on the upswing now. That was the good sign. Admittedly, not for purely altruistic reasons. Rae wanted her family back. "What about the physical symptoms?" she asked. "How are... how are those doing?" It was strange to be asking things like this, but what he was going through did nothing to change the love she had for him. She'd prove that. Whatever it took.
The best view. Rae nodded her head and looked out over the compound. "And some nice memories attached to it." She chuckled. "It's hard for me not to smile when I'm here."
"I do," she argued in return. "Because since the beginning, I've been doing nothing but making it harder. You might have to share the blame with me on this." She closed her eyes when he stroked his thumb along her cheek and enjoyed the feel of him touching her. That week felt like an eternity. God was she glad to have him back. Even if it wasn't permanently. "I don't feel guilt free. So please let me shoulder some of the blame, okay?" It wasn't fair for him to carry it all.
She shrugged. "I know. Even if I don't think you could hurt me." She was insistent about that. He didn't know about the falling episodes she'd had, so he didn't know the extent of her healing abilities, but she felt like this was a bad time to bring them up. "But the fact of the matter is that you needed space from me. No matter how you wrap it, that's what's inside the box. And I love you, so I'll do whatever you want me to do. It hurts me, too. Not to see you. I feel like it hurts more not to be there, than anything that could happen." She'd said that before she could reel it back in.
Why was he so afraid? Rae glanced away for a second and nodded her head. "If that's what you want," spoken softly, because even though she understood, it was hard to think of that, with all the alone time they had spent together, "then I'll do whatever it takes..." she whispered. "I just... I don't want to go another week or however long without seeing you." Not after how much the first one hurt. A tiny bit of her wanted to ask if he'd be out by his own birthday, because if he wasn't, her party plans would take a really serious downturn. But she didn't want to. Both because she didn't want to pressure him, or give away her secret.
"Tell me about it," she chuckled in response to his comment about being codependent. "I never used to be like this dependent, but I wouldn't change it for the world. I love you, and you're the best thing to happen to me, too."
He asked her to sit and she nodded, willingly following where he led her and taking a seat beside him. As close as she could be without making things uncomfortable. "Back when I loved in the Bronx? I loved the rooftop of my building," she told him with a little smile. "I'd go up there every year on my birthday with an iPod and dance." She looked around and chuckled. "I don't think either one of us is in the mood for a dance, but this..." she leaned against him and relaxed a little, "this is better."