Rae knew that look. The look that meant that he was thinking about his wife. Rae herself had had that look more than once, and she knew the dark spiral that came with it. "You can talk to me, you know? About her, I mean? I know sometimes it's easier to talk to someone you don't know that well, so..." she shrugged. "And plus... I've been there. I'm... I'm still there." She loved Silas, no question. She wouldn't trade what she had with him for anything in the world. But there were brief moments, in the morning, that she woke up and felt heartbroken because Elliot wasn't the one beside her. It sounded awful, probably, but Rae couldn't help how she felt. "I'm just saying, even if you don't want me to reply, I can just listen and nod.
With a little laugh, Rae nodded her agreement. "Back in high school and a mother of way more than just one kid," she mused with a grin. "So a really weird combination, but it is what it is, I guess." She paused when he explained that he was a secret keeper, and she shrugged. "Fair enough. I don't really even have any questions right now, since he's actually really upfront with me about basically everything, but if I think of something, I'll ask you," she said with a tiny smile.
"Considering the fact that I'm a girl, I should hope so," she teased and nodded her head. "To be honest, though? I'm less of a feminist and more of a 'human rights' person." She'd always sort of been like that, and she probably always would be. With fresh air in her lungs, she moved a little bit easier, even if she still felt like if she stopped for too long, she'd pass out.
She paused and shrugged. "I kind of prefer being the helper to being the helpee, you know? There are plenty of people here who need help, but not so many who are willing to help. And I think my willingness to help sets me apart. Maybe that's just me. Or, just you and me," she chuckled a little bit. She knew there were others, but the exaggeration was for the sake of the conversation. "Growing, huh?" she asked with a little laugh. "Well, I guess everyone could use a little personal growth, right?"
Oh. Crap. She laughed bashfully and ducked her head when Regan pointed out that she'd accidentally used Silas' nickname. "Oh, right," she snorted a laugh. "Yeah, she did. I don't know why he's so insistent on keeping it secret, really. It's not like it's a weak name or anything, you know? He gripes a little when I call him Topher, but he likes it, I think. If he didn't, he'd probably have stopped me by now, you've got to figure." Or maybe not, considering he never stopped her from doing anything else ever. "Like I said, I don't think there's much you can tell me that he wouldn't himself, but we could still really wig him out for the fun of it, am I right?" she asked.
She smiled sadly this time. "I can understand that," she told him with a genuine smile. If she didn't have full hands, she'd reach over and give him a supportive shoulder squeeze, bur she didn't, so she hoped that her expression said what her words couldn't. She understood, and she believed that he'd be okay. "It'll take time," she told him quietly. He'd know what she meant.
Dazed, Rae answered, "There's no ice?" though she knew full well that they'd passed over the ice awhile ago. Probably not helping her case any, but she couldn't take it back now. He asked what really happened and she blinked a couple of times. "I don't really know," she admitted. "It was just like... one minute I was standing and the next I wasn't." She didn't admit to being tired or anything, mostly because she was afraid of what he'd say. And she couldn't stop right now. If she stopped, she'd sleep for too long and people needed her awake right now.
"Don't tell anyone, okay?" she asked him quietly, blinking hard in the face of the burning ache that came with her healing. "Especially not Topher, Lucas or April..."