It was both completely alarming and completely not, the fact that Rae could tell just by the look on his face (and the fact that he'd defaulted back to making jokes, too) that she'd eased his mind. Really, they'd only known each other for a year and a half, and sometimes, Rae felt like she knew him better than even Sarah, who she'd known since high school.
She laughed a little bit. "Maybe I'm trying to make you blush," she said, nudging him with her hip and winking. She bit back a comment about wanting to see him with pink cheeks and how cute it would be, instead ducking her head and chuckling when he mentioned how brave she was.
"Also takes a little bit of crazy," she pointed out. And she wasn't that brave. Patterson could tell him that, with how she'd clammed up in the face of that swimmer. Or even the fact that she was too afraid to be honest with him about how she felt. So no, she wasn't that brave. "But I do it to protect the people I love. The thought of anything happening to you all is almost enough to stomp on my self-preservation instinct," she joked.
"Hey, I'll make time for you," she said, probably revealing too much in just one little sentence. "I mean, I do a lot out there, I think I've logged a little selfish time and I can't think of any better way to spend my selfish time than with you…" she mused, poking him in the side in hopes of tickling him. Thinking, she glanced down at the floor, then back up at him. Back before the world went to hell, Mondays had been her only days off. She went to school Tuesday through Friday and worked Friday night through Sunday, and some things were deeply engrained, so, "how about we make it official and choose Mondays? That can be the day we just drop everything and make time for each other…" she suggested.
Rae was unable to stop herself from leaning her head against his shoulder as they walked so close. She felt comfortable with him. Safe, warm and comfortable; three things that were so rare in the world they lived in that Rae wanted to enjoy it. "Your shoulder is a comfy pillow."
Well, if he wouldn't complain about it… maybe she'd have to try it sometime. If she ever became less of a chicken anyway. "Logging that away. Now don't be surprised if I hog up all your space tomorrow night," she thought aloud, her cheeks turning pink when she realized it. But she couldn't take it back now.
She looked around the area, then back at Eli. "You know, until someone claims it? We should totally make it our Wintertime Rae and Eli Day spot. Gather up food, drinks and stuff for the day and bring it in here to hang out on days when it's too cold to go for walks…" she suggested. "Could be fun, right?"
He asked her what had woken her up and she paused, looking down at the camp light in her hands and shrugging a shoulder. "Um…" she scratched the side of her head and lit the light, setting it on the floor outside of the small row of seats, then sitting down in the chair beside Eli. Rae was a terrible liar, and she had no desire to lie to Eli about what had woken her up, so she didn't, as difficult and as embarrassing as it might have been to tell the truth in this case. "Neither, really. I've kind of… I've been having nightmares lately. Drowning ones. Since… you know." She folded her hands in her lap and looked down at them.