It was fruitless to try and argue her side of things, when he hadn’t been exposed to her upbringing. Adversely, she found it difficult to see his side, as well. Evan’s parents hadn’t been married. His father had left. Perhaps that was why he was so gung-ho about the idea of the marriage bond. Which, again, brought her back to her own feelings of being trapped in a marriage.
“You say that now, that you could never go back to hating me, but you don’t know what’ll happen a few years or even just a few months from now. Something could happen…” One of them could die. Or they’d decide that this relationship wasn’t the best thing for them. Any number of things. “…And it’d be just like the day we first met all over again.”
In the back of her mind, Leah knew that she was overreacting to something that was more than likely a misunderstanding on her part, but the fuse had been lit and once the spark took hold, there was little to do but ride out the explosion. She also realized that, while she hated being compared to Olivia, she was doing the same thing to Evan. Comparing him to Ben. That made her angrier at herself more than anything.
His words followed her down the tree, but she didn’t stop to respond until she was safely on the ground. There was added annoyance this time, brought on by the fact that the sheer fabric of her outfit had been ripped in places by the rough bark. “Then why the fuck didn’t you just ask me over breakfast or something? Instead of doing all this?” She gestured around them, at the beautiful setting he’d created. He’d done all this for her…
She started off in the direction of George’s place, to collect Marigold and then… what? Go back to Evan’s place? No. No, she didn’t want to go there. She didn’t want to be anywhere near Evan right now.
He was following her, though, and the part of her that was in love with him forced her to stop. To hear him out. Frustrated, she cupped her hands over her face and then dragged them downward, as if that could erase all her fury. It didn’t help. All that he’d done for her tonight, all because he simply wanted to ask her stance about marriage, made it feel like he was trying to pressure her into it. So that his hard work didn’t feel like it was for nothing.
“I don’t want to marry you, Evan. Not now.” The way she said that last part probably sounded as though this whole night had put her against marrying him altogether. Leah realized that, but she wasn’t in the right mindset to go into a better explanation. Maybe she’d consider marrying him someday… Five, ten years down the road. If they were still together. “I’m going to stay with Lilah for a couple days. I’m not breaking up with you, so please don’t think I am. I just need time to get over being fucking pissed at you for this.”