|eeyore9990 (eeyore9990) wrote in hpfamilyfuncest,|
@ 2007-09-24 13:10:00
|Entry tags:||blackcest, rating: nc-17, sirius, tonks|
We Fade to Grey, for hpfamilyfuncest
Mod note: While we wait for the final two fics, please enjoy this story, a gift to the fest, from misfit_ragdoll.
Title: We Fade To Grey
Author: ragdoll (on IJ misfit_ragdoll)
Word Count: 2800
Warnings: Blackcest, non-con, dub-con, rape, rough sex, biting, verbal humiliation, angst
Disclaimer: It's not my sandbox, I only play in it. All characters belong to JK Rowling, Bloomsbury, Raincoast, Scholastic, Warner Bros. et al. All situations/words belong to me.
Much love to K. for her betaing and to eeyore9990 for running the fest, being so patient in the midst of so much insanity and betaing my story too.
The non-con is non-con here. It's not meant to trivialize or glamorize rape in any way.
DH Spoilers: None. This is set sometime during Order of the Phoenix.
Summary: Tonks loves her cousin, Sirius. She will do anything she has to to make him to love her back.
Tonks doesn't really know why she allows it to happen. After the first time, as she left Number 12, Grimmauld Place broken, bruised and sore, she swore nothing like this would ever occur again. And yet, the next time he looks at her with those grey grey eyes and whispers "Nymphadora," his voice soft and sad, she acquiesces. She can't stop herself. She wishes she could.
She has loved him since she was a small child, her mother's favourite cousin turned hero in her eyes. She was always convinced he was innocent of the crimes he was sent to Azkaban for, always knew that he, Sirius Black, couldn't possibly have betrayed anyone the way they said he did. She's spent years defending him to people who hadn't understood, wound up bloody and torn trying to clear his good name. And now he leaves her in worse condition just because she loves him.
The first time it happens, they're in the kitchen after an Order meeting, just the two of them in the drafty old house. He's had too much to drink so she stays behind to take care of him, thinking that perhaps she alone can reason with him. After all, they're family. Sirius comes over to her, smelling like firewhisky and musk and regret, his hands cupping her face. Tonks's heart skips a beat as she feels his fingers, rough and firm, against her skin. This is what she's always wanted, isn't it?
He looks into her eyes and she is lost. His eyes are grey. Grey like storm clouds, grey like the morning mist, grey like a stormy sea. She's known this since she was old enough to know the name of the colour when she looks up at him. It suits him, her cousin Sirius, whose moods can be turbulent and violent, as changeable as the weather. No one else in the family has eyes that colour, at least none that she knows of. Her own are dark, brown as mud, a common colour. She could change them if she wanted but somehow, she never thinks to. So they remain brown -- like her mother's, like her Aunt Bellatrix's, like her great-aunt Walburga's.
Sirius tells her so. "You look just like her, you know. My mother…"
Tonks laughs, thinking of the horrible screeching woman in the painting in the hallway. "Thanks for the compliment, mate."
"No, I mean it. She was beautiful when she was younger." His hands tighten against her jaw line, his words slurred. "Where d'you think I get my good looks from?"
"Just reckoned it was those brilliant Black genes -- luck of the draw, really," she murmurs as he moves in closer. And then his mouth is on hers and he's kissing her until she's breathless, her knees threatening to buckle. He shoves her back against the cupboard, pinning her down; she can feel the cold silver snake-shaped drawer knob jamming into her lower back. His mouth is fused on hers, his hands everywhere, pulling at her clothing. She wants this, but not here, not like this. "Don't," she whimpers, trying to move away, but he will not listen. "Why don't we go upstairs?"
"Don't tell me what to do," Sirius rasps, tearing at her tee-shirt. He holds her fast and bites at her exposed breasts; they are small and round, the nipples hard. She hates that they betray her need of him. "It's my fucking house…</i>mine.</i>" Tonks is no longer sure if he is talking about the house– or herself.
He bites her again, his teeth clamping around her breast, eliciting a yelp of pain. She struggles, attempting to reach her wand, but he's too strong, too determined, his large hands clamped around her narrow wrists.
"Sirius…" she pleads, "don't…"
"Shut up." Suddenly, his wand is out, the tip pressed against her throat, his eyes glinting madly in the light of the kitchen. "M'bloody sick an' tired of hearing you wittering on. Tired of you ordering me about," he snarls. "For once, you'll do what I want, how I want, when I want." He looks her over, his expression one of unadulterated lust. "Take off your jeans."
Tonks hesitates. It's a mistake. The next thing she knows, Sirius's hand impacts with her jaw, knocking her head back against the hard wood of the cupboard, and her vision momentarily goes to black. The whole side of her face stings and she thinks she can taste blood.
"Take. Them. Off. Now."
This time she complies, knowing he'll brook no argument. Her hands shake as she unzips her jeans, wriggling out of the heavy denim as fast as she can manage. It's difficult when he's pressed against her like this, his breath hot and laboured as he nips at her neck. She can feel his erection against her bared thigh and she whimpers as he shoves a hand inside her damp knickers, his calloused fingers rubbing against her clit before making their way inside. Tonks can't help but moan despite his rough treatment.
"Like it, do you?" Sirius lets out a low chuckle. Tonks feels herself reddening, embarrassed that she's reacted at all.
"I—" He cuts her words off with another hard kiss, his tongue darting between her parted lips. Finally, he withdraws his questing fingers, now slick with her juices, forcing them into her mouth, laughing again as he makes her lick them clean.
He rips away her cotton knickers with ease. It hurts as he sheaths himself inside her, his thrusts coming hard and fast. Tonks starts to weep, hot tears running down her cheeks and into his long, dark hair. Somehow, her tears seem to spur him on.
This is not how she's ever imagined it. In her adolescent fantasies, Sirius made long and intense love to her on soft feather beds covered in satin sheets, or in cool forest glades after his daring escapes from prison. Since she's gotten to know him as an adult, the scenarios have changed very little, still full of romantic nonsense. At least they are compared to this
"That's it," Sirius grunts. "Cry for me, bitch. Cry for me…" He slams into her, determined to hurt her, break her in every possible way. His eyes are unfocused as he drives his cock into her, and she gets the feeling he isn't seeing her at all. It's as if she is another person, in another place and time. Knowing that she is helping him exorcise old demons almost makes the situation bearable. Almost.
Thankfully, it's over quickly. Sirius comes violently, his body wracking and shuddering as he does. He slumps against her, panting and gasping for breath. Tonks forces back a sob, unsure whether to comfort him or hit him. He relaxes his hold on her, shaking his shaggy head as if to clear it. She wonders if he's finally realised she's there.
"I..I should go," she finally blurts, looking around desperately for her torn clothes.
Sirius nods, stepping away and straightening out his own garments. He does not look at her, his eyes averted anywhere but on his cousin. "Yeah, erm, you…you do that."
She scoops up her clothing, not even bothering to dress before she runs out into the night.