Entry tags:

draco malfoy, draco/harry, harry potter, harry/ron, ron weasley

[FIC] Look at Me: Draco/Harry
Originally Posted Here on 13 August 2006

Title: Look at Me
Written for: pixystick
Author: yura_slash
Pairing/Character(s): Draco/Harry (mentions of Ron/Harry)
Rating: hard R
Word Count: 4,423
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter
Request: Harry/Draco, Harry/Ron, Harry/Ginny, Harry/Sirius, or Harry/Pansy. I love plot. And lots of it. For kinks, I prefer light breathplay, light knifeplay, and some bondage is all right too. Harry is my favourite character - all the angst in the world is wonderful, but I want him to be the one winning. And by winning, I don't necessarily mean the war. I mean emotionally.


Harry tried to sit up and open his eyes, but the light from the window was too bright. He groaned in agony and shut them tight again. My head is KILLING me.

He let his head fall back to the pillow and threw an arm across his eyes. He must have had way too much to drink last night. He sighed heavily and tried to remember what had happened at the Slytherin party. It was a bit hazy, but after that fight with Ron, well, he’d decided to drown his sorrows in a bottle of Firewhiskey. Having had half the bottle, it wasn’t too surprising that he couldn’t remember a damn thing.

Harry squinted against the sunlight and tried to guess the time. It may be just his imagination, but the sun was coming from a different direction than usual, and an aura of magic surrounded it. He groaned and closed his eyes again. Getting drunk after a fight with Ron probably hadn’t been the best of ideas, but it had seemed right at the time. Besides, he’d already agreed to go to the Slytherin party in an effort to “further inter-House relations” (in Hermione’s words).

Unfortunately, he couldn’t recall making any leaps and bounds in that department, and not only did he have a splitting headache, but his tongue was stuck to the roof of his mouth and tasted like an armpit. Lovely. And the chances of Hermione helping me pinch a Hangover Potion are next to nil. He remembered her disapproving face vaguely from the night before. He’d been dancing… with someone… and she’d shouted something…

Harry gave up trying to remember what had happened the night before. In all likelihood, he’d made an ass of himself and then stumbled off to bed. The fact that he was in bed and not passed out on some stairwell somewhere was encouraging, at least.

He shifted a bit, uncomfortably hot under all the silky sheets covering his naked body. Wait a minute… silky? Naked? He opened his eyes again, squinting against the glare of sunlight in the room, and tried to make out his surroundings. It was no use. He couldn’t see anything without his glasses and he was only blinded further by the sun’s early morning rays. He pulled the sheets off his bare chest and sat up carefully. He’d probably passed out in one of the other boy’s rooms – Neville’s perhaps – and so they’d traded for the night. Every seventh year had their own room, and each House had their own special dorm floor reserved for them. Why the other boy had silk sheets while everyone else settled for flannel he’d have to ask later. Not only that, but he’d probably have some apologies to make, especially since he had no idea where his boxers were. He fished around under the sheets for them, and then froze in disbelief. The sheets weren’t red, but green! He reached for his glasses in panic, but they weren’t on the nightstand where he usually left them. In fact, there was no nightstand there at all! All the Gryffindor seventh year rooms had nightstands on the right! Oh shit. Oh bollocks. Oh fucking hell, I’m naked and not even in my own House!

He tried to untangle himself from the green, silky sheets wrapped around his legs, but he flailed a bit to the left and came against something solid. He froze again when a light moan broke the silence.

Oh shit, I’m in bed with someone!

Harry’s heart was in his throat, now. From the color of the sheets, I’d bet the person – the lump moaned again and Harry grimaced – the bloke moaning next to me is a Slytherin. He shifted carefully, trying to ease out of the bed silently, but a sharp burst of pain gave him pause. It wasn’t just the pain that made him pause, but where the pain was coming from – his ass. Oh hell, not only am I in bed with another bloke, but I’ve gone and cheated on Ron! It didn’t matter that no one else knew about their relationship, if you could call it that – Harry still felt panic grip his heart. Oh Merlin, if Ron was pissed at me for our argument yesterday, he’s going to be murderous when he finds out about this! He’ll never speak to me again!

He rubbed a hand across his face and breathed deeply in an effort to slow down his racing heart. It was no use. I’ve got to get out of here before whoever-he-is wakes up! He gave up on being stealthy and just wrenched free of the sheets. Unfortunately, this ended in him tumbling to the floor, and an added injury to his sore backside.

“Harry?” a raspy voice called out.

No. Nope. Not happening. This is not happening. He scrambled over the ground looking for his school robes. His hands finally came up against a pile of black cloth and he sighed in relief. He pulled the robe over his naked body and, giving up his glasses for lost, headed for the blurry outline of the door.

“Harry? Where are you going? I thought –”

The voice was too raspy for Harry to identify, not that he cared. He was through the door and out into the seventh year Slytherin dorm floor before the mystery boy could follow him. Harry clasped the robe and held it tight against him as he fled.

**************************

Draco fell back against the pillows and sighed. He should have known better than to listen to Potter. Especially when he was completely pissed and whispering in his ear about ropes and collars and knives... Hell, if Harry’d been thinking rationally he never would have followed Draco back to his room, and Draco knew it. But fuck! Neither one of us was thinking rationally – and it was all bloody Potter’s fault! Completely! The raging hard-on Harry – Potter – had given him with his sultry suggestions and nips to his ear – hell, what else was he going to do? Send him on his merry way and be done with it? Take himself in hand once he was nicely tucked in bed, cold and alone?

Draco snorted in disgust. He hadn’t had to “take himself in hand” since he was 13, for Merlin’s sake, and he wasn’t about to start. Sure, he probably could have had anyone he wanted at that blasted party, but Potter had been right there, and saying such deliciously dirty things…

Draco thought about all the things they’d done. The collar, the knife, the ropes… it all stood out starkly in his mind as the most fulfilling night of sex he’d ever had. And he hadn’t even known that Harry was into blokes – nevermind that he’d been taking it from that weasel Ron for almost the whole seventh year now. In fact, some of the things they’d shared… he squeezed his eyes closed in pain. They’d talked after it was over, holding each other and murmuring softly. And now Harry didn’t even remember… Potter had told him to call him Harry, had told him that he and Ron were over, and that he’d never leave his side again if he could help it. Then he’d told him not to feel guilty about Ron, not that he felt guilty anyways, because they were incompatible and had pretty much ended things that day.

From what Harry had said, they’d broken up because of Ron’s inability to please him in bed. Draco smirked for a moment, reveling in his new discovery, before his face fell again.

He was probably too pissed to even remember what happened… what he said… what we agreed –

He gritted his teeth. Well fuck him! The bloody poof can rot in hell for all I care! If Voldemort was still alive, I’d help him kill the green-eyed bastard this time around.

He fumed silently for a moment before the nasty taste in his mouth overrode his brooding thoughts. He threw out his left arm and groped across the nightstand for his wand. A breath-freshening spell should hold me over for now…His hand inched across the surface, searching for eleven inches of cherry wood, when it came across something quite different. Yes, it was quite different from his wand, but very useful for someone without scruples. Thankfully, Draco had no illusions about himself – his scruples were non-existent. And really, that made what he was about to do so much easier…

**************************

Draco strode into the Great Hall for lunch, as poised and polished as ever. He’d skipped breakfast in order to primp himself to perfection (it had definitely paid off), and to let Harry stew. Or brood. Whichever was Harry’s cup of tea that morning. He was sure that Harry was already catching hell from his sidekicks for vanishing the night before, and for a certain something that Draco held tightly in his right hand.

Let’s see if you can ignore me now, Potter. This’ll teach you for forgetting last night. For forgetting me!

He made his way to the end of the Gryffindor table and stopped in front of the Golden Trio. They didn’t notice him at first, and he smirked when he heard Hermione scolding Harry. Perfect. He coughed discreetly, hoping to catch their attention without causing too much of a stir. His eyes darted over to the Slytherin table and took note of his Housemates’ curious expressions. He didn’t want them getting involved, that was for sure. When neither Harry nor his annoying sidekicks could be pried away from their no doubt scintillating conversation, he coughed again, louder this time.

They looked up at him in surprise.

“Afternoon, Potter,” he greeted smugly.

Harry squinted at him and Draco could have sworn that something squeezed his heart at that moment. It was almost enough to make him give up this whole thing. Almost…

He threw Harry’s glasses on the table and they clattered in front of him. “Here are your glasses, Harry,” he practically purred. “You left them in my room last night after… well, you know.”

He smirked when Harry’s face went white and Hermione let out a small gasp of surprise. What he hadn’t been counting on, however, was the fist heading towards his face.

“Bastard!” Ron shouted, knocking Draco to the ground and falling on top of him in his rage.

“Ron!” Hermione shouted, aghast, while Harry just looked on in shock, glasses once again perched on his nose.

“I’ll kill you, you bloody ferret!”

“Help!” Draco wheezed. “Isn’t anyone going to help?”

Unfortunately for Draco, they were on the wrong side of the table, and no one could see them but a few gobsmacked fourth years.

They grappled for a few moments more, before Hermione finally snapped out of it and stood up to intervene. “Ron! Stop this at once!” she shouted, brandishing her wand. When Ron ignored her, she shook her head and waved her wand determinedly, forcing both boys into a full-body bind. “There, that’s better.” Looking up at Harry, she eyed his bruised neck and wrists carefully. “Harry? Do you want to leave now and go to Madam Pomphrey? I can hold these two off for now…”

Harry shook his head. “No, let them talk it out. Maybe if they can’t use their fists –”

“Of course, Harry,” she answered, “let me just put up a quick Silencing Charm.” She erected the bubble around them and then waved her wand once more. Draco and Ron’s faces suddenly were free from the petrification, and they scowled at each other murderously.

“Could one of you please roll Ron off of me? I don’t exactly appreciate the closeness,” Draco said snidely.

Hermione blushed a bit before kneeling down and rolling Ron off of Draco.

“Ouch! Watch the nose, ’Mione!”

Draco snickered and Ron glared at him out of the corner of his eye. They were both flat on their backs and stiff as boards now, but that did little to quell Ron’s anger. They were getting curious looks from a few Gryffindors, but because they were on the opposite side of the table, and down at the end, no teachers had noticed the slight disturbance.

“So, what exactly is this all about, boys? And why did Draco have Harry’s gla–”

Hermione didn’t even have a chance to finish before Ron exploded. “Harry’s mine, you hear me, Draco? Mine! If you so much as touch him again –”

Hermione paled. “Ron, what do you mean Harry’s yours? You’re not –”

“I’ll touch him all I want, Weasel, especially when he comes to me, practically begging for it. Maybe if you knew how to please him, this wouldn’t have happened! I, on the other hand, know a thing or two about what a man wants–”

“Harry! They’re not serious!” Hermione turned to Harry, who was blushing brilliantly and looking away from her.

“You bastard! You gave Harry those bruises! What sick things did you do to him, huh? Tie him up? Choke him round the neck?”

“Hey! At least I’m not turning down the lights, squeezing my eyes closed, and imagining a bloody girl under me! How do you think Harry feels about that, you filthy, disgusting ass?”

“How dare you! How dare you even suggest that I –”

“Oh shut it, Weasley. We all know you’re imagining Granger when you pound into him. Too bad she’s too bloody uptight for that sort of thing. I, on the other hand, know a good thing when I have it.”

“That’s enough!” Hermione roared. Both of them stopped their shouting for a moment and looked up at her in surprise, like they’d forgotten she was even there. She looked down on them in disgust before turning towards Harry. “Harry,” she continued softly, “it isn’t true, is it?” When Harry just looked between the two boys on the floor, she gulped. “I mean, I guess I can believe that you and Ron –” she choked a bit, but tried to finish the question with as much dignity as possible. “You didn’t really have sex with Malfoy, did you?”

He turned around and met her eyes. “I – I don’t know. I don’t even remember –”

“I knew it!” Ron crowed triumphantly from the floor. “Malfoy’s a bloody liar! Harry would never –”

“But he did! He did, and we did, and he said he’d never go back to you, you insensitive wanker!” Draco interrupted, face purple with rage.

Ron looked more surprised that Draco had used the word wanker than anything else, and Hermione was watching Harry’s face closely. “Harry, I’m going to try something. Just… don’t panic.”

“What? What are you talking about Hermione? Try wh-”

“I’m sorry, Harry – Commemoro!”

The party – people dancing – the firewhiskey – music – dancing – a sneering blonde face – sultry words – hard body –

Harry was plunged back into memories of the night before, the experience so intense that he fell forward against the Gryffindor table, his body lifeless. He thought he heard Hermione call out his name, and was that Draco? Ron? But he couldn’t hold on to reality, unprepared for the deluge of images and voices that suddenly assailed him.

“I want it, Malfoy. I want you to tie me up and fuck me so hard.”

Pounding music and trembling hands.

“I bet you like knives, Malfoy. I bet you’d love running them across my skin, watching me tremble under you, just barely drawing blood. Wouldn’t you?”

A groan and light touches.

“God, I want you so bad, Malfoy. I want you to put a collar on me like I’m yours – like I belong to you. I want you choking me with it.”

A hard grip on his shoulder, tugging him away from the people around them, away from the music.

“Merlin, Harry! My room – now.”

Draco, tying his wrists to the bedposts and looking down on him hungrily. Draco, taking out a small dagger and licking its cold length. Draco, watching him closely as he snapped the collar in place and then drew it tighter around his neck, making sparks go off in his eyes.

Knife points drawing lightly on his skin – small beads of blood welling up – Draco’s small, pink tongue – the pressure on his neck – the fingers inside him – the heady feeling of almost choking and being filled at the same time –

And Draco surging inside him, hitting that spot almost immediately, pounding into him as he pulled on the collar and let it go and pulled and – Draco, coming inside him so hard he could feel it, and the mouth on his cock, and why hadn’t Ron ever done this before? And the way Draco’s throat convulsed around his length, and the way Harry came so hard he blacked out, and the way Draco swallowed his cum without a second thought, and the way he held him afterwards, so gently that Harry wanted to cry. He’d never been held after sex before, and when Draco took the collar off gently and then freed his wrists only to rub them soothingly afterwards, well – Harry did cry, just a little.

Harry came back to himself when a firm hand shook his shoulder. “Mr. Potter – Mr. Potter get up this instant! I do believe you and your friends have caused enough theatrics for one day. Miss. Granger, free those boys immediately.”

Harry sat up straight and blinked owlishly. “What? Who?”

Snape’s face suddenly swam in front of him and made him jump back in surprise. “You heard me – stop this foolishness at once!”

“I – what?”

“Harry?” Hermione’s face was suddenly there, too. “Harry? Are you okay? I’m sorry for –” Draco and Ron were getting up from the floor, brushing themselves off and glaring at each other, when Harry suddenly snapped back into reality.

“Oh shit!”

“Mr. Potter! Five points from Gryffindor for –”

Ignoring Professor Snape completely, Harry stood up shakily and looked towards Ron with wild eyes. “Shit Ron, I’m so sorry. I just –” He couldn’t say it. Draco was just looking at him, grey eyes solemn, and before he knew what he was doing he had pushed past Hermione and fled the Great Hall.

**************************

The entire Great Hall was watching them. Draco couldn’t have cared less. “Sorry, sir, but I must be going,” he shouted over his shoulder, already running after Harry.

“That’s right, you coward! Run while you still can!” Ron shouted after him.

A loud crack – Hermione’s hand across Ron’s face – was all Draco heard after that as the door to the Great Hall swung shut behind him and the chase began. He climbed staircases, ran down hallways, skidded around corners, and finally came up to the door he knew hid the Room of Requirement.

And it was closing fast.

Draco put on one last burst of speed, hoping against hope that he’d catch the door before it closed and disappeared behind Harry’s back. Almost…

There! Draco stuck out a hand just in time, catching the edge of the door and then skidding to a halt. Thank Merlin… He drew in a few gasping breathes, trying to slow down the frantic beating of his heart, before finally drawing himself up and pushing open the door.

The room was dark. “Harry?” The door slammed shut behind him and a fire appeared out of nowhere to the right, scaring him shitless.

“Why?” Harry’s voice floated across to him quietly, somewhere from his left. “Why did you tell him, Draco?”

“Harry, please, don’t –”

“How could you? How could you ruin everything like that? He was all I had –” The lights flickered briefly and Draco caught a flash of something close by.

“Harry, don’t say that. It isn’t true –”

“I’m so ugly. No one should have to look at me. Ron was doing me a favor just to have me in his bed, and now… now I’m all alone again.” The fire burned a little brighter and suddenly Draco could see. He saw Harry, his green eyes swimming with tears, just a few feet from him, and he moved towards him, a fire burning in his belly now.

“No!” Draco shouted fiercely, grabbing hold of Harry’s shoulders and shaking him in frustration. “He’s not all you have! Don’t you remember anything from last night? The things we –”

“I remember,” Harry whispered wistfully, turning his face to the side and avoiding Draco’s piercing grey eyes. “I remember everything we did – the knife, the c-collar.”

“Not that,” Draco hissed angrily, grabbing Harry’s chin and turning him back to face him. What he saw melted him instantly. Harry’s green eyes were spilling over with tears, and his throat worked under Draco’s hand as he tried to hold back his sobs. “Oh Harry,” he whispered, all the anger suddenly drained from him. “Afterwards… remember afterwards. ”

Harry looked at him in confusion for a moment before the clouds left his eyes. Two more tears slipped free as he blinked rapidly. “But you – but I… you hate me! Why –?”

“I don’t hate you, Harry,” he murmured softly, wiping the tears from Harry’s face with gentle fingers.

“Yes you do,” Harry whispered, still trying to believe it.

“No, Harry, I don’t. I haven’t hated you since you put my father away, and I finally realized what working for Voldemort meant. Because of you, I never fought for that snake, and because of you, I… Last night, I… I realized…”

Harry leaned into his touch and Draco jerked in surprise when a bed appeared out of thin air behind them. “Show me,” he whispered.

Draco lowered him to the bed and did just that.

**************************

Harry lay in bed, a snoozing Draco cradled in his arms and images of the last hour playing through his head. Draco had lowered him to the bed and then stripped him slowly, kissing each inch of skin reverently as it was revealed. Harry had never felt so loved in his entire life. The night before had been about lust, passion, and the heat of the moment; today had been about care, compassion, and a loving devotion that shone through every gentle caress and searing kiss. Something in the way Draco had made love to him promised happiness, promised a future together. When he’d opened him carefully with his fingers, sliding in and out and drawing small moans from him, his grey eyes has been watching his hole greedily, anticipating that one, long, slow slide home…

Harry’s eyes fluttered closed in remembered bliss. Ron had never looked at him like that when they had sex. The lights were always turned down low… his eyes always squeezed shut as he prepared Harry hastily. Harry had spent so many mornings in bed, sore and bleeding lightly, that he’d gotten used to the pain. Gotten used to Ron’s inexpert and fumbling dry fucks –

But not anymore. Not when he had this. He kissed Draco’s forehead softly and extracted himself from his dangling, pale limbs, careful not to wake him. Once he’d escaped Draco’s sexy… naked body… Harry shook his head clear and grabbed his glasses off the bedside table. Before leaving, he turned around to look at Draco one last time and smiled.

**************************

Ron pounced on him the moment he stepped into the dorm room, his face red and fists clenching. “Where have you been? I swear, if Malfoy’s so much as touched you –”

“It’s okay, Ron. You don’t have to pretend anymore.”

“Damnit, Harry! I’m not pretending! I’m fucking upset! I care about you and you’re off with bloody Malfoy of all people!”

Harry smiled at him sadly. “Of course you cared for me. I cared for you, too.”

“What do you mean cared? Harry, I –”

“I still care for you, Ron. But it’s not quite right, the two of us together.”

Ron’s lips pressed together in a thin line, but he said nothing.

“Frankly, Ron, I’m not even sure you’re into blokes.”

Ron shook his head, his expression still tight. “But Harry, you’re the only person I –”

“Don’t lie to me Ron,” Harry interrupted coldly. “I know you’d do anything for me, but this, it’s just too much. You’re lying to yourself.”

“I really do love you,” he mumbled, casting his eyes to the ground and crossing his arms stubbornly.

Harry reached out and, grabbing his chin, lifted his head gently. “I love you, too. But I think we’ve been confusing one kind of love for another. You should want to see me when we make love, Ron. You shouldn’t want it in the dark, your eyes squeezed closed and imagining someone else under you.”

“Oh Harry… Harry I never meant for you…”

“To know?” Harry asked quietly.

Ron nodded miserably. “It wasn’t every time, just…”

“You said her name once,” Harry whispered.

“Oh Harry I’m so sorry,” Ron choked out, jerking his head away and out of Harry’s hand. Harry saw a tear spill down his cheek and felt something inside of him break. “How can you ever –?”

“I forgive you,” he said simply, and meant it. The thought of Draco, asleep in the Room of Requirement and waiting for his return, made it easier.

**************************

“No ropes this time?” Draco asked in surprise.

“No – no… ropes,” Harry answered breathlessly, thrusting up and into Draco’s hand.

“What then?” Draco whispered seductively in his ear, making Harry whimper.

“Want… want to be on top of you… o-ooh…”

“Oh really?” Draco asked pulling Harry into his lap and biting his neck as he fisted him.

“Oh Merlin, Draco – YES! Oh!… want you… fuck! Want you watching… watching me as you… f-f-fuck me…”

“That I can do,” Draco growled, reaching for the lube.

Harry sighed happily when he turned up the lights.