Happy springsmut, thehangedwoman! Author:midnight_birth Recipient:thehangedwoman Title: Say My Name Rating: NC-17 Pairing(s): Kingsley/Percy Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended. Warnings: Assumed to be disregarding info JKR gave in interviews about Percy (though I left his profession the same as it makes sense), scenes of very explicit sexual nature (oral and first!time anal), light bondage. Word Count: 9,959 Summary: Percy works very hard as a high-ranking official to the Minister for Magic. Too hard. His friends and family try to stage an intervention. The Minister, himself, would really rather like Percy to loosen up as well, and tries a lot of things before he finally finds something that decidedly works. Author's Notes: I’ve never written this pairing before, but the wheels were set in motion when I started writing it and I could barely bring myself to wrap this story up at all it took such a life of its own. I’ve tried to include everything you asked for, except for the McGonagall/Hermione-specific requests, since I didn’t go with that pairing. This was immensely fun to write, and I hope you enjoy it! ♥
~*~
“And... done!” Percy announced to his empty office, signing his name at the bottom of the document and throwing his quill down on the table.
Fifteen pages, three hours of research and one half-hour break for lunch, and in a day’s work he’d completed the report due in two weeks. That meant he was done with reports for the month of July. On top of that, he’d organized Kingsley’s schedule for the whole month (something he wasn’t asked to do, but definitely needed to be done since Kingsley “promoted” his only assistant into the Auror department and then attempted to do it himself), written a long letter to Charlie, sending over all the information he could find on a certain dragon-related law, and had a spectacularly messy break-up with someone he wasn’t aware he was even officially dating, again. So far, the week looked rather successful and typical in that fact.
He glanced at his watch and smiled. Fifteen minutes to midnight. As usual, he would Apparate home, go to bed, and then come right back in the morning. It was a flawless idea to take planning what to do with his free time out of the equation. Percy figured if he didn’t have “free time” and enjoyed what he did at work, he would really kill two birds with one stone. He hated boredom more than anything else, but found himself afflicted with it if he wasn’t either at work or doing work. This, of course, was more than ok with Percy. Work was his life. It had been his life since his first year at Hogwarts, when he knew he had to get good grades, get a good job, get paid a whole lot, and get out of the situation his family was constantly in. That was the reason. The actions he took to get there had become a habit; he realized he loved working, studying, learning, over-exerting. He never missed having a social life or, since the failed attempt at it with Penelope so very many years ago, much of a love life.
It was Ginny that ruined it for him. She had apparently gathered all his friends and family – Ron had cracked when Percy leaned on him to tell him what happened – and told them that an immediate intervention was in order. He knew it was out of concern that she had done that, but that didn’t make him any less angry. He had put up with his mother’s constant clucking about him “overworking”, which turned from pride to concern fairly quickly when she caught on to his work habits, but he wasn’t expecting such an assault from the rest of his family.
They thought they were being subtle, of course, but Percy found them as inconspicuous as a rhino in a china shop. Harry, Hermione and Ron, who worked at the Ministry, stopped by in turn, and sometimes all together, for lunch and “small talk” regularly. It was very awkward, but they were trying. Charlie wrote three times as many letters, and George, Lee Jordan and Bill dragged him around London every weekend, going to Quidditch games, introducing him to countless people, and setting him up on dates with wild, adventurous and loud women who drove Percy insane. He could only last a couple of month before he firmly told them all to shove it and let him return to his structured, peaceful, quiet life, which he very much enjoyed.
They changed their tactics. They started to treat him like he was made of wafer-thin glass. He was the “troubled” one to them now. The one it would take more than the usual methods to get through to.
Percy got up and tidied up his desk hastily with a frown. He had always been like that, and better off for it. It seemed they simply picked on him now out of nothing better to do. The war was over, and he felt everyone around him had a standard of the “happy life” everyone should finally be able to lead. His mother thought the fact that it seemed he didn’t have a nice girlfriend and was in no hurry to have kids was the biggest problem. Of course, he thought, not having a girlfriend was not the reason he would not be having kids, but now was not the time for that kind of revelation. It would be simply adding fuel to the fire.
The good thing about leaving in the middle of the night was that the Ministry was dead and silent. He figured out the trick long ago. He would confidently and cheerfully assure whoever happened to stop by on their way home to check on him that he would be leaving within the hour, not long after the work hours were over, and then stay for however long he wanted undisturbed.
“Late night again?”
Percy jumped, stubbed his hand on the door-handle, and dropped the stack of files he was holding onto the floor, whipping around. He didn’t need to look, of course, to recognize the voice. Kingsley Shacklebolt, the Minister for Magic himself, was leaning on the wall casually, eyeing Percy with a calm, imperturbable look that was Kingsley’s trademark.
“Oh... Minister. I... Um...” Pull yourself together, he snapped at himself inwardly and cleared his throat. “Good evening, Minister. Really lost track of time tonight. Didn’t even realize it was this late.”
“Kingsley, please, Percy.”
“Right, sir.”
Kingsley frowned but it was a usual dance. For three years of working directly with him, Kingsley has been insisting that Percy call him by his first name. It was true that Percy found himself being one of the only people who knew Kingsley quite well and still call him by any sort of title, but Percy had to draw a line between work and everything else. He didn’t have friends at work, he had colleagues. Not even with his family did he practice any kind of inappropriate familiarity. He’d been told by Ron countless of times that he was incredibly anal to do that, and he knew the Minister probably thought that too, but years of principle and practice laid in stone were not easily unlearned.
He knew, of course, that Kingsley preferred to have friends, not subordinates, or at least in his close circles, but Kingsley was Percy’s boss. He was a Minister for Magic, and he also happened to be the fourth Minister that Percy had had to work for. It was the first time in his life, really, where his professionalism and a completely detached disposition seemed to be not what a boss of his was looking for. Of course it could be because Percy wasn’t actually as detached as he would love to have everyone believe. As far as Percy was concerned, people in charge loved to have power, have people acknowledge that power, and have people with less power act accordingly. Kingsley was nothing like that and Percy didn’t know how to fit in with him. Changing that drastically was something Percy was sure he simply could not do. Not even for Kingsley and not for lack of trying.
Percy fidgeted nervously and then proceeded to lock his office and pick up the files off the floor. He was surprised to find Kingsley still standing in the same place considering him when he turned around.
“You don’t live very far from here, do you?” Kingsley asked, accompanying Percy to the elevator.
“No, sir.”
“But you Apparate?”
“ Apparate or Floo.”
“Not walk?” Kingsley sounded surprised and Percy gave him a sideways glace. He had never once walked home from work. He disliked Muggle London. He didn’t hold a fascination for it that his father had, even though he lived in the middle of it. He took walks through it sometimes, though when he really felt like a walk, he simply Apparated to Hogsmeade or outside Ottery St.Catchpole. Anywhere where he could enjoy a quiet walk without having to even think about whether he was dressed like a Muggle, or whether he did anything Muggles would find unusual.
The elevator ride was silent and short, but when they stepped out into the Atrium and Percy headed for the departure fireplaces, Kingsley stopped him and gave him one of those genuine smiles that made Percy forget who and where he was for just a quarter of a second.
“Why don’t you walk with me today?” Percy opened his mouth to protest, but Kingsley quickly added, “It gets lonely sometimes late at night, and I’m afraid I’m not a fan of Floo or Apparition when I can help it. It’s a wonderful night!”
Percy felt irritated and trapped when he allowed himself to be dragged towards the visitors exit. He didn’t have a doubt in his mind that Kingsley knew Percy was going to refuse and thus found something Percy couldn’t say no to. Not that Percy didn’t think a walk with Kingsley would be perfectly pleasant, of course. A willing Kingsley, though, not one who was probably bullied into hanging out with Percy and giving him some “fatherly advice” by his mother. He heard Molly use that phrase on Kingsley once, citing that while Arthur couldn’t get close enough to Percy most of the time, Kingsley had the position of power that Percy respected, and could at least make him listen. But Kingsley wasn’t as old as his father, and Percy definitely didn’t look at the Minister as a father figure.
It was a very nice night, and they walked in comfortable silence. Percy waited for Kingsley to start in on him on one thing or another, as everyone eventually did, but Kingsley looked relaxed and happy to just be walking in company. The streets were empty for the most part, and Percy had to admit that walking wasn’t the worst thing. Perhaps he would even consider doing it from time to time. Maybe when he didn’t work as late, he could use it to pass the time and get home slower.
“I got used to walking when I was working for the Muggle Prime Minister,” Kingsley said slowly, conversationally. Percy nodded. “He used to love to take me for walks and drill me about the wizarding world. Sometimes, we would just walk for hours, and it kind of grew on me.”
Kingsley’s voice sounded affectionate, and Percy wondered whether there was something between Kingsley and this Muggle Prime-Minister that wasn’t strictly professional. It was none of his business, he scolded himself. He wouldn’t deny that he often tried to find out at least Kingsley’s preference, but Kingsley seemed to never date or have any hint of a romantic life whatsoever. They were similar that way. Perhaps Kingsley just hid it very well, being the Minister, but Percy didn’t allow himself to ponder too long on the subject. Thinking that way about his boss was preposterous. And not that it would lead to anything, anyway. Percy was certain that even if Kingsley fancied blokes, he would never fancy Percy. Especially not after his dear sister had brought it to everybody’s attention what a pathetic life he led.
Kingsley stopped suddenly and looked up. The sky was clear with a few bright stars. Not that Percy ever looked, but now that he had, he had to admit it was a lovely sight, and a rare one for the city.
“Beautiful,” Kingsley said. “I’ve spent a lot of time with centaurs, you know, and they put a lot of trust into the stars. I always wished I could see as much as they see up there, but of course centaurs are not ones to share their knowledge outside their kind.”
“So I’ve heard,” Percy replied, feeling foolish. How did Kingsley manage to be so easy-going and talk about strange things and not feel awkward?
Kingsley sighed and looked over at him.
“Listen, Percy, I would really love to grab a drink sometime. “
Percy couldn’t stop himself before blurting out, “With me?”
Kingsley’s lips became thinner, much like McGonagall’s when she wasn’t pleased, but he chuckled. “Just a pint. I like to kick back sometime and relax. We’ve worked together for a long time, but we never have time to talk, really. You work right under me and I can barely say I know you as well as I should.”
Percy heart, beating in his throat, suddenly plummeted. It wasn’t like that. It wasn’t only not romantic, it wasn’t even the way that Harry would ask Ron for a drink. Kingsley, in his usual way, just wanted to play nice. He was pressured greatly by his family to force Percy out of his bubble, and he wanted Percy to drop the “sir” and become a buddy. Going out with his boss would probably be as awkward as if he went out with Arthur for a “blokes night”.
“Great, then!” Kingsley grinned. “I’m really looking forward to it, Percy!” He shook his hand animatedly. “This is me! We part ways here. See you at work tomorrow!”
Percy stared after the tall man as he hastily walked away. Had he said yes in his reverie without even realizing it? Kingsley certainly acted as if Percy agreed, but Percy was pretty sure he didn’t say a word. This smacked strongly of the way his brothers asked him out – ask and not wait for an answer, and then drag him out citing that he promised.
Percy dragged his feet all the way home, surprised he found it with as much ease as he had. He was going out with Kingsley. He was going to spend time alone with him outside of work. The depressing part was that if Kingsley had asked of his own accord, without pity or feeling of duty, Percy would be ridiculously excited at the notion.
~*~
Percy brought the glass to his lips, tipped it into his mouth, and fought the urge to spit the liquid out for about five seconds before doing just that. He was sure his face had turned beet red, too. So far, this was the most embarrassing night of his life. He found himself incapable of keeping an intelligent conversation for some reason, he tripped on his way to the bathroom, knocking over a waitress who spilled beer right on his head, and then, to top it off, he came out of the bathroom with a long piece of toilet-paper trailing after him and made a spectacle trying to unstick it from his shoe without bending over.
Kingsley had politely pretended he didn’t notice any of this, but, of course, things like that only happened when he was looking. Percy was sure he regretted going out for a beer with Percy already, only one hour into the evening.
“Have you never had Firewhiskey?” Kingsley asked, handing Percy a napkin, looking as if Percy didn’t just spit all over him. “I should have warned you it was very strong.”
Percy could never stomach Firewhiskey. It was indeed way too strong for him, considering that he almost never let anything touch his lips that wasn’t water or tea. Even beer made him slightly sick, but he wasn’t going to let on about that in front of Kingsley. He couldn’t believe that he acted like an adolescent when he had come there with a goal to act as mature as he could manage. He’d been of age to drink almost eight years now, for Merlin’s sake! He could have at least pretended it wasn’t the first time he was touching alcohol in his life.
Kingsley seemed completely at ease, as usual. He chatted amiably about everything but work, telling jokes, asking questions, and generally acting like a bloke hanging out with another bloke on a Friday night. Somehow, Percy expected it to be a lot more awkward. He was awkward, of course, but it was a self-induced malady. Kingsley was the epitome of sociability. He acted like he’d known Percy for many years and they were great friends. Percy had no idea how to take that. He suspected, with a heavy feeling, that the reason Kingsley was so at ease was because for him, it was nothing more than hanging out with a friend. Percy, however, against his better judgement, looked for any sign that it could be something a little less platonic, and failed miserably, cursing himself for his weakness. He found he wasn’t able to control himself, or at least control his thoughts and feelings, very well outside of the office. This was probably why he felt most comfortable at work. It was harder to blur the lines there.
“Never really liked Firewhiskey,” Percy mumbled, wiping his lips with a napkin and dabbing it at the puddle on the table.
“Should have told me.” Kingsley looked amused as he drank his own glass in one gulp and screwed up his face. The truth was that Kingsley toasted to “health and happiness” before Percy had time to say anything, and it would’ve been extremely rude to not drink after a toast was declared.
Percy had never known Kingsley to be very open or overly social. Kingsley was always calm, quiet, and stoic. He spoke slowly and made the words he did say count. It was surprising to see him as relaxed and talkative in a less formal atmosphere. Percy wouldn’t deny he enjoyed himself, though he would definitely enjoy himself more if he wasn’t convinced that Kingsley was just putting it on for politeness. Percy couldn’t possibly be very enjoyable company.
“I received your invitation a while ago, by the way,” Kingsley said and took out a bright purple envelope. “Thank you for inviting me.”
Percy flinched at the ghastly neon colour. “I had almost nothing to do with the guest list, really. My mother and sister addressed those. I was instructed to stay out of the way.” Percy saw Kingsley’s face fall considerably and added quickly, aghast at his own rudeness, “But I told them I would love to have my close colleagues there.”
It was a lie, but a white one. Percy was sure that if he hadn’t invited Kingsley and it had been a private family gathering, Kingsley wouldn’t be the least bit insulted, but he didn’t want to imply that he didn’t mean to now that the invitations had already been sent and half of the wizarding world, it seemed, had been invited. If it was up to him, Kingsley wouldn’t have been invited simply out of propriety, but his family insisted on every occasion being a veterans’ reunion. It didn’t matter what it was. Everybody they knew from Dumbledore’s Army and The Order of the Phoenix in particular was always invited everywhere. If it was up to Percy, he wouldn’t have had a party at all. Turning older didn’t seem a very big deal to him, and considering the size of his ever-expanding family, a simple family-dinner would have already been a zoo.
“Twenty-five,” Kingsley mused, cradling his glass. “A pretty round date. I hit a round one myself this past year. People always make bigger deals than they should of the round ones.” Percy nodded. He remembered Kingsley’s birthday. It was so packed he never even got to get close to him, seeing him only on stage for his speech. “You must be excited, though, no?”
Percy gave a forceful nod. “Birthdays are joyous occasions.” It was a general statement allowed him to not say what he actually thought about the whole ordeal but not a lie, either. He thought himself quite clever for it.
Unexpectedly, Kingsley gave a heavy sigh, put his glass on the table with a slight crash and fixed Percy with a very serious look. He looked exasperated and a little upset, Percy was surprised to note. He had never seen Kingsley look at him like that before. He swallowed nervously. Had he said something? Aside from the stupid birthday invitation comment, which Kingsley seemingly let slide, he had been perfectly polite and civil.
“You don’t feel comfortable around me at all, do you, Percy?”
Percy opened his mouth to assure him of the opposite, but the words died on his tongue. Something about the way Kingsley was looking at him didn’t allow him to lie as easily as he usually did.
“Is it only because I’m the Minister?”
There was something behind Kingsley’s eyes at that question that Percy found rather odd. He knew he had a tendency to read way too much into things, but the question hit the nail on the head. Even as he nodded, he could see that Kingsley was aware Percy wasn’t being completely honest. It wasn’t only because of that. Being an antisocial person in general didn’t help, but he was more than antisocial with Kingsley. With Ministers and authority before him, Percy could always find an impartial, professional stance. There were no personal feelings involved. With Kingsley, he felt on edge when he was around him, and it was evident. When he wasn’t concentrating very hard on acting collected, he stumbled, stuttered, dropped things and had words leave his mouth that mortified him a second after he’d said them. When he was concentrating with all his might he came off about as stiff as a broom handle.
“I see.” Kingsley was still frowning. “I can’t impose myself on you, Percy. I have had plenty of time to notice you draw a line between a friend and an authority figure, and I respect and appreciate the way you treat me, but I wish you could relax a little around me. Look around.” Percy did instinctively. “We’re in a pub, drinking, not talking about work. I’m not here to counsel you about your life or your career, or to give you a Ministry-related assignment. I’m not here to play the mentor. I’m here as a friend hanging out with another friend, drinking beer, kicking back. I’m not trying to play the father,” the intent look was back, “and I certainly wouldn’t want you to look at me in that way.”
Percy was suddenly very conscious of his hands and not knowing what to do with them. He found himself wringing them frantically until Kingsley’s gaze dropped to them and he had the presence of mind to quickly drop them into his lap and out of sight. He was over-thinking it again, he knew that. If anybody else had said the same sentence, he wouldn’t have even noticed the wording. But Kingsley said it, and he looked strange when he did, and he put an interesting accent on the word certainly. He had probably said that because he didn’t want to be made to feel old, but could he be implying something, too?
Percy, for lack of better things to do, grabbed the glass and threw it back, forcing himself to swallow the rest of the Firewhiskey in it. His throat burned, but his brain suddenly had a shock of clarity. He fancied Kingsley and was searching for any excuse to hope that Kingsley could fancy him back. That excuse was never going to present itself because the idea was ludicrous, so Percy had repeatedly made a fool of himself in front of Kingsley for no apparent reason at all.
Suddenly, Percy felt an urgent need to get out of the pub and away from Kingsley. His realization couldn’t have come at a worse time, because he wasn’t good at dealing and figuring out things like this in the privacy of his own mind, let alone right in front of the person who was the reason for all the panic inside his head. He reached for his wallet and dropped a few Galleons and Sickles on the table. Kingsley looked at him in surprise.
“Hadn’t realized how late it is,” Percy mumbled lamely, jumping up from the table and shaking Kingsley’s hand clumsily. “Should really be getting home. Not feeling very well, either, from the night, probably. Thank you for the lovely Firewhiskey.”
He ran off before Kingsley had even managed to get up. When outside the pub he turned into a dark alley and buried his face in his hands. He couldn’t recall what exactly he had said before leaving, but he was sure it was ridiculous and didn’t make any sense. If Kingsley had somehow managed to withhold his judgement that Percy was a loon so far, he certainly had to be convinced of that now beyond a doubt.
Not that you had a chance to begin with, but you really blew it now, he thought bitterly before he Disapparated.
~*~
“Percy Ignatius Weasley, you get over here this very minute!”
Percy could see his mother wasn’t really mad. Molly was pretty much incapable of being mad at her children on their birthdays, but she sure hid it well. This was the sixth time her flushed, happy face had appeared in his office fireplace in the last two hours. He didn’t have to guess to know what she had been doing all day from the white smudge on her nose he knew to be flour and her dishevelled hair.
“Mum, it’s two in the afternoon,” Percy said patiently. “The invitations said five. I have work until four-thirty, and I promised I’d come right over.”
“Nobody expects you to work on your birthday!” Molly insisted, frowning. By the look on her face Percy could see that what she really meant was that nobody better expect him to. “All your brothers and Ginny are already here, as well as Harry and Hermione with her parents. It would be nice for you to spend some time with just your family before all the guests start to arrive. It will be just too hectic then!”
Percy sighed. He wanted to shoot back that if she wanted him to spend time with his family, she should have only invited his family and not half of London, but he knew that would upset her greatly. She had worked non-stop for the last two weeks planning the party, and would not hear anyone trying to persuade her to tone it down. His party was already moved from the Burrow’s garden to the field nearby. All he was asked to do was to bugger off until the date and then show up for the party.
He couldn’t shake the feeling of surprise and faint guilt that after what he had pulled during the war she still loved him as much as she did. He’d heard of the whole “mothers love unconditionally”, but he’d never imagined he could be still worthy of it. Molly had already lost Charlie to Romania and Bill to Fleur, so she clung to her remaining four children and Harry and Hermione, not letting a chance pass by to baby them. He knew he would be getting a party like this until he got married, which probably meant that he would be the only Weasley child of his generation to still be getting them eventually.
“Mum, really –”
“Kingsley!” His mother’s face broke out into a warm smile and she was looking past Percy now. “Kingsley, please, would you bring my son home?”
“I’m afraid he’s a little too big for me to throw over my shoulder and carry, Molly.”
Percy stood rooted to the spot. He had successfully avoided Kingsley for five day, seeing him only when his job required it and not really looking up at him or saying anything aside from “Yes, sir” or “No, sir”. Percy had found with surprise that his job didn’t actually require him to spend as much time with Kingsley as he usually did. He supposed he really knew he fancied Kingsley long before he let himself realize it. Kingsley didn’t seem to push it at all. The hopeful part in Percy hoped it was out of understanding, but the realist in him knew it was because Kingsley probably thought him a loony git and didn’t want to spend more time with him than was strictly necessary.
“Oh, Percy, you’re beet red.” His mother smiled at him. “It’s alright to joke around like that with Kingsley, dear. I know he’s the Minister for Magic and everything, but he’s a dear friend before anything else.”
Percy groaned inwardly. At twenty-five he still had to go through the adolescent ordeal of being embarrassed by his mother. As if he hadn’t embarrassed himself in front of Kingsley enough. The fact that his pants got suddenly tighter at the thought of Kingsley throwing him over his shoulder really didn’t help matters.
Molly seemed to have sensed the tension even from her fireplace, because she smiled unsurely and said, “Well, alright, dear. You get here as soon as you can, as promised. You too, Kingsley. Don’t overwork today, both of you.” She smiled again and, after a pause, vanished.
Percy turned slowly, wondering what the expression on his face looked like. Kingsley was standing by the door as if waiting for permission to come in.
“Can I do something for you, Minister?” Percy asked tensely.
“Yes, actually, I would like to ask something about the report you handed in yesterday.”
Percy felt a huge weight lift off his shoulders. It was just work stuff. It was as it had always been... almost.
“Oh. Right, of course. Please come in.”
He took a few steps forward and Kingsley repeated the notion, closing the door behind him.
“It’s your birthday today,” Kingsley said when he heard the “click” of the door closing. “I know it’s up to you because you’re the birthday boy, and I hope I don’t ruin it by being so frank as to bring this up, but I didn’t want to go into it like this.” He motioned vaguely between them. Percy blinked. This didn’t sound like it had anything to do with any report. “I really went out on a limb when I asked you to have a beer with me, and though I could see how uncomfortable you got, I pressed on.” Kingsley was speaking evenly, though his eyes betrayed an uncharacteristic excitement. “I must apologize. I was convinced your actions stemmed out of something other than, I can see now, they actually did. Unless I am mistaken?”
As usual, Percy couldn’t catch on to the nuances, and as usual he was convinced that the only nuances that even existed were inside his mind. What he was sure of, however, was that Kingsley shouldn’t be apologizing to him. It made Percy uncomfortable to even think that Kingsley believed he had done something wrong when it was Percy who acted like an absolute idiot. And, as hard as it was for Percy to voice anything remotely personal to anyone at all, it was really time to start trying.
“I should be the one apologizing.” He felt around for the words unsurely. How did people know how to put what they felt into words without giving away too much? Perhaps those people actually knew what the bloody hell they felt, to start with. “I really didn’t know how to act around you so I acted like I did.” Kingsley was looking at him expectantly, giving him the time to get it off his chest without questioning. “I know I’ve worked for a lot of Ministers for Magic before, but it was all the same with all three of them, and very different with you. For one, I certainly couldn’t ever think of fancying any of them and –”
Percy felt his body stiffen before he even realized what he had said, and he imagined this was how it felt to look into the eyes of a Basilisk. It seemed his words dawned on Kingsley at the same speed, because the look in his eyes went from intent to thoughtful to shocked. There was no doubt that Kingsley realized what Percy implied by that careless slip. He wasn’t daft with subtext.
The next thing he knew Kingsley was coming towards him with a serious look on his face and Percy was stumbling back towards the fireplace, grabbing for the Floo. He wasn’t sure whether Kingsley intended on hitting him, but he was getting closer fast, and the intent look he wore didn’t promise anything good.
“I... I’m... My mum,” Percy stuttered. He didn’t even care what came out of his mouth as long as he could just get out of there.
“Percy, wait, relax, I –”
“The Burrow!” Percy said clearly and threw the Floo into the fireplace, stepping into it at the same time. He was lucky enough the red flames turned into magical fire in time, though he thought burning to a crisp when he was already burning with shame would be quite appropriate.
The last thing he saw was Kingsley’s frowning, almost pained, expression. He closed his eyes and tried to keep his lunch down. After he somehow got through his party, which Kingsley perhaps and hopefully would now not attend, he would probably have to think about how to explain to his family why he was quitting the job he loved out of the blue.
~*~
Hundreds of faces, small talk, screaming children and grumbling old wizards and witched, more food than anybody could ever consume and an exploding cake courtesy of George and Lee Jordan were like fragments to Percy. He floated through the party with a fake smile on his face, ditched the dozens of girls his relatives tried to introduce him to (one girl per relative, it seemed, and a bloke from George who seemed to catch on fast without help), and looked around with evident apprehension. It had been about an hour and a half since the guests started arriving, and there was no sign of Kingsley anywhere. Percy hoped that meant that he could assume that Kingsley wasn’t intending to show up, and let himself relax. This was his birthday party, after all. He could think about his idiocy tomorrow in detail, but today he could let go.
He heard a clinking noise and saw his mother and father standing up on a small podium, all the faces turning towards them as Molly pointed the wand at her throat. People around Percy stepped aside, and a bright spotlight fell on him before Molly started speaking.
“Thank you for coming.” She beamed at the still crowd. “I’ve been told I give the same speech for every one of my children when they reach the important dates, but I would like to see you have sev- six... as many children as I do and then make up a different speech for every single one for every single occasion.”
The audience laughed dutifully. They knew she hadn’t meant to depress them with her miscount. Percy knew that she would probably never get used to having six children, not seven, and suddenly realized he really loved his mother. She went on smoothly, allowing her sadness to go hand-in-hand with her happiness. Percy wished he knew how to balance things that way.
“Arthur and I had always been very proud of Percy.” With a pang, Percy realized she meant always. “We are proud of all our children, and our Percy has his own way of making us proud. A Prefect and Head Boy at school, now a high-standing fast-rising government official. He always got what he wanted, our boy, and did what he thought was right. Twenty-five is a nice number, and we raise out glasses to toast to his further happiness and success.”
“We’re proud of the person you’ve become, Percy,” Arthur added with a smile. He meant it, too.
Percy allowed himself to smile at them. The Weasley children all thought their parents’ birthday speeches extremely corny, and he was not an exception, but parents were allowed to be corny. Percy thought this party was for them as much as it was for him. He nodded at the people around him, their glasses extended towards him, and looked up to find Molly had remained on stage and, after searching the crowd with her eyes, brought the wand back to her throat.
“There is another person we’ve asked to give a toast to Percy tonight, and we are honoured to say he had gladly agreed.” Percy got an ominous feeling at the bottom of his stomach. “He had worked with Percy for the last three years, since the end of the war, and had kept an eye on him for us. We are so glad to have someone like him care and look out for Percy. He is none other than the Minister for Magic but, more importantly, a great friend, Kingsley Shacklebolt.”
The crowd erupted into applause and Percy felt his stomach plummet. He didn’t even have a chance to hope that his mother simply hadn’t noticed that Kingsley was not there when he saw the crowd part and the tall figure of Kingsley make his way to the stage. Had he come just to give the speech in order to fulfill his promise to Molly? Had he been there all along, avoiding Percy?
When Kingsley was on stage, Percy forced himself to look up and meet his eyes. Kingsley wasn’t looking away. He stared calmly and Percy wondered, again, how Kingsley managed to not flinch in disgust at the mere sight of him after everything he had done. When Kingsley’s deep, rumbling voice finally swept over the crowd his eyes stayed glued to Percy’s.
“I haven’t known Percy for as long as some of you have,” Kingsley started, “but I feel honoured to know him at all. Percy is more than anyone can ask for in my job. He is diligent, hard-working, attentive, polite, and patient. We all worry about him; I don’t think it’s a secret to him by now. He works very hard and his job is his life. But I’ve had the pleasure to get to know Percy a little better in the last couple of weeks.” He gave a sad smile and Percy knew they were the only two people in the whole crowd who shared the meaning behind those words. “What I’ve discovered is that our worries are for naught. Percy is the way he is, and he’s perfect the way he is. He may not be as relaxed or laid-back as we think he should be, but perhaps it takes time to find something in your life that would allow you to be able to do that.” At last, his eyes left Percy’s and travelled across the crowd, seeking out his family and close friends. “I believe we shouldn’t worry but trust him and give him the opportunity to find that, if that is what he wishes. Who knows? Maybe he’s found it already and just doesn’t know it yet.”
The crowd applauded as Kingsley bowed and swept off the stage, but the applause was strained. It seemed evident that Kingsley was saying something for someone’s benefit alone and, not being that person, they couldn’t exactly understand what he meant. But he was the Minister and he had extended a positive sentiment towards Percy, so they clapped and smiled appreciatively. Percy, though he knew he was the person to whom the secret meaning in Kingsley’s cryptic message was addressed, also, as usual, didn’t understand. He was beginning to think that when it came to Kingsley his eager trouble-solving brain just stopped functioning. He really wished it hadn’t.
“That was a lovely speech!” Molly was by him, pulling him into a hug. Percy was relieved when the spotlight dimmed and disappeared and people averted their eyes and went back to socializing with each other. “I didn’t understand it entirely, of course, but I imagine he only wanted you to. I’m glad you and Kingsley have such a nice understanding. I was beginning to worry you drew away from him because he was a family friend.”
Percy’s thoughts were running through his head a million miles a minute and he needed a quiet place to collect and organize them. He put on what he thought was a convincing face.
“I have a bit of a head-ache,” he said, putting his head on his mother’s shoulder. He felt Molly stiffen and then wrap her arms around him again. He hadn’t displayed any sign of affection of that nature in many years now, and he knew that that it was the best gift he could give her. When he was a little boy, he used to lay his head on Molly’s shoulder in the exact same manner and had her smooth his hair until he felt better. He felt a little guilty doing it to get his way now, but he figured that the only thing that mattered to Molly was that he had done it, not why. “I think I got over-excited. Would it be ok if I took a short nap?”
“Of course, dear.” Molly’s hand was in his hair and her voice was shaking slightly. She pulled away, breathed in deeply to collect her emotions and gave him a proud grin. “We’re cutting the cake in about an hour and a half. Try not to be away too long, but certainly take a little rest. This kind of thing can get overwhelming, especially after the wonderful things Kingsley had said about you.”
Percy climbed the stairs to the second floor of the Burrow thinking that Molly had no idea how right she was. His room was dark and somehow seemed too empty. His bed, desk and dresser were still there, but he had taken all of his other possessions out of the house when he moved. It was strange seeing his room without stacks of papers on the desk or a neat row of ironed shirts and robes in his closet. His bed had been freshly made, though. He knew Molly had done just in case he needed a break like this one.
He walked over to the window without turning on the light and opened it. There was laughter and music floating up to the room from the field, but the house was uncharacteristically quiet. The garden was unlit.
He didn’t know how, but he sensed it. There was somebody else in the room, and he knew who without a shadow of a doubt. For a minute his mind and heartbeat slowed down and he stood wrapped up in silence. He knew he had to speak first. He didn’t know why but it seemed important.
“I’m sorry,” he offered quietly. “I shouldn’t have said what I said. I let my tongue get ahead of me, and I know I probably ruined everything and... I don’t even know why I said it. You must think me stupid after everything.”
He heard a sigh. “Did you mean it?”
The sincere meaning behind unlikely sentiments seemed to be the night’s theme. Percy considered this and then nodded. He didn’t know if Kingsley could see him nod, but he was answering himself more than anybody. The room fell silent and still and Percy was sure Kingsley had gone. There was no reason for him to stay. Knowing him, he would make it as easy as he could manage on Percy. He probably felt terrible knowing that Percy harboured feelings for him he couldn’t return, but in a situation like that there weren’t many options aside from simply walking away and then moving on.
He drew in a sharp breath when a body suddenly pressed against his from behind, trapping him between its warmth and the window. Kingsley’s lips were at Percy’s ear and his arms went around his waist, pulling Percy closer. Percy’s mind was racing again. Kingsley wouldn’t be doing that if he didn’t... But this was Kingsley. Minister for Magic. His boss, in front of whom Percy embarrassed himself repeatedly and non-stop. This couldn’t be right. Kingsley couldn’t feel what Percy felt. But this didn’t feel like a friendly or comforting hug by any stretch of the imagination.
“Minister, we shouldn’t,” Percy breathed out when Kingsley’s hands slid down to his hips. Kingsley froze and stiffened. Percy wondered whether the reminder that he was, in fact, the Minister, and Percy was his subordinate, snapped Kingsley out of his momentary insanity.
The last thing Percy expected was to be turned around roughly, slammed hard against the window and had his hands pinned above his head. Kingsley’s face was inches from him, and the look in his eyes made Percy’s stomach do painful somersaults. He would have never guessed Kingsley was capable of such a predatory look.
“You are the most stubborn young man I’ve ever met,” Kingsley growled, looking down into Percy’s face. “What must I do to convince you to say my name?”
There was a sudden click and Kingsley dropped his hands to take Percy’s face in them, and Percy, to his horror, realized that his hands were pinned to the window with magical restraints.
“Minister, are you sure you –”
Kingsley let out a sound between a growl and a groan and crushed his lips to Percy’s. If Percy wanted to know if Kingsley was sure, there was no better way to prove it. The stray thoughts of “boss” and “Minister” and “fraternizing” crept up on him, but it was hard to think of anything when Kingsley was kissing him like that. His whole life had been about his job, but now Percy didn’t care about it. He didn’t care if Kingsley was sixteen years older than him, the Minister for Magic or a close friend of his parents. His body ached because he wanted to touch Kingsley so bad, but he imagined Kingsley was perfectly aware of that fact. The unfulfilled desire washed over Percy in waves, making him hard. Kingsley leaned back and smiled the genuine smile that Percy was much more used to.
“You know,” he said, vanishing Percy’s robes with a flick of a wand, “I tried quite a few things to try and help you unwind and relax a little bit. Except, it seemed,” Kingsley’s fingers were skilfully unbuttoning his shirt now, “that I had the exact opposite effect on you.” He paused and stroked Percy’s lips with his thumb. “Didn’t take very long to figure out that, considering the new facts that came to life, I was taking the wrong approach. Didn’t take much to lead you into a confession, either.”
His shirt was gone as well. Percy suddenly felt small and insecure. He hadn’t gone very much past this point before. During his school time, he had made out with Penelope a lot and they touched each other some, but that’s as far as it went. She had never even agreed to give him a proper hand-job. Since then, no relationship of his had ever gone past the point where he would have to worry about something like that (and interactions he had could hardly be called “relationships” to begin with). He hadn’t met anyone until Kingsley he felt he wanted to have sex with. It seemed to just hit him that that’s where things were headed as Kingsley ran his hands over Percy’s chest and then leaned in to kiss, lick and bite his way down his neck and chest. When Kingsley’s mouth was on Percy’s stomach Percy whimpered and drew away self-consciously.
Kingsley looked up at him and Percy avoided his eyes, blushing. He knew Kingsley wouldn’t be able to see him blush in the semi-darkness, but it was as if Kingsley sensed Percy’s apprehension.
“Percy, had anyone ever given you a blow-job?” The question was so direct Percy was surprised. He didn’t think he would be able to ask someone something like that straight on. He was very aware of how helpless he was.
Kingsley stood up and faced him. He looked serious.
“Please, be completely honest with me for once,” he said. “We’ve passed the point of no return, you know. I know you want me, and I fancy you too, Percy, and neither my position nor yours is going to change anything. So just tell me.” He kissed Percy on the mouth again. “Have you ever had a blow-job?”
“No.” Percy’s voice sounded throaty. He didn’t recognize it.
“May I give you one?”
“Yes.” This was a completely different kind of politeness than Percy had ever exercised. It was making him painfully hard.
“Would you like me to free your hands?”
Percy had to consider this. He had never been tied up before. He hadn’t even considered he might like to be one day. It always seemed way too out there for him, and he supposed that when it came down to it he would be a pretty simple traditional guy. But he couldn’t deny that he loved the feeling of control that Kingsley had over him. He loved aching to want to touch Kingsley and not being able to. He loved the fact that Kingsley had done this of his own accord. And, ultimately, he trusted Kingsley and his instincts much more than his own.
“No.”
Kingsley smiled at that and kissed him again, deepening the kiss and biting on his lower lip gently. Percy moaned when Kingsley’s lips were once again on his neck, biting his collar bone, going down and sucking in one nipple and then the other, nipping lightly and then harder. When Kingsley kissed his stomach and made quick work of Percy’s trousers and pants, freeing his erection, Percy felt his whole body tense.
“Relax,” Kingsley whispered, his lips inches away from Percy’s cock. He moved his head closer and pressed his lips to the head, making Percy scream out and tense his arms in their restraints. “Trust me.”
Relaxing and trusting was one thing Percy wasn’t very practiced at, but those thoughts were wiped clean from his mind as Kingsley’s tongue slowly licked up his shaft and then flicked the top. Slowly, torturously, Kingsley licked the tip and then took it into his mouth, pulling back and then swallowing more.
Percy knew he couldn’t last long. It was too intense, too much. His whole body was shaking and he was yanking on his restraints, wondering how he was still standing. He certainly couldn’t feel his legs anymore. This felt like nothing he’d ever experienced before, and he was crying out and coming before he even realized it, his whole body shaking with an intense orgasm. His hips were bucking, beyond his control, burying his cock deep in Kingsley’s mouth. Spent, he was hanging almost entirely by his restraints when Kingsley snapped his fingers and Percy collapsed into Kingsley’s arms.
Percy was shaking and Kingsley was cradling him in his arms, completely clothed while Percy was naked and sweaty. Percy hadn’t expected things to turn out like this, though he wasn’t complaining. More than anything, he wanted to reciprocate, though he was sure he wouldn’t be any good at it at all, having no idea what he was doing. When he got the feeling back in his legs and arms he sat up and gave Kingsley a searching look. In their relationship, it seemed, Kingsley would always have to be the boss, or at least for the next little while. In this field, Percy needed a lot of guidance.
Kingsley looked at him questioningly. The kindness and stoicism were back along with his small smile. Percy found he liked that look as much as he liked the look of lust. They both suited Kingsley perfectly.
“I’d like to...” He trailed off. He hadn’t spoken about sex with anyone ever. He wasn’t as comfortable as Kingsley seemed to be wording things of that nature. He didn’t seem to find the right words.
“Would you like to know what I’d like to do?” Kingsley asked and Percy nodded eagerly. “I’d like to make love to you.”
Make love. Percy sat, stunned. The words felt right and incredibly foreign. It was as if Kingsley felt how important this was; Percy was sure he did. The words seemed to embody everything Percy was feeling – fear, nervousness, an overabundance of emotions he couldn’t really name yet, and wanting Kingsley despite all that. To say “fuck you” or “shag you” wouldn’t have felt right. Not at that moment. “Have sex” was too impersonal. He didn’t want to fuck, shag or have sex with Kingsley, he realized. He wanted to make love. He wanted to be made love with.
It wasn’t about lust anymore. It was about something deeper and more personal and meaningful. Not love yet, but it made Percy feel like maybe one day it could be.
Kingsley helped Percy up and walked them towards the bed, allowing Percy to get rid of his clothes on the way. Percy explored Kingsley’s body hungrily when they tumbled into bed. He couldn’t help but be fascinated with the other man’s muscular large build, smooth skin and overpowering scent of Kingsley. Percy knew Kingsley’s scent even though he had never drunk it in like that before. He could admit now that he had undressed Kingsley with his eyes on more than one occasion, and now wasn’t disappointed. Kingsley was hotter than Percy had always thought he was. He concentrated on Kingsley’s cock as he stroked it and looked at it with obvious fascination, loving the fact that he could make Kingsley moan in pleasure by touching it like he had often touched himself.
Kingsley kissed Percy and then gently turned him over, running his hands up and down his back, biting and kissing his shoulder, sucking in the sensitive flesh behind Percy’s ear. Percy couldn’t help but tense again when Kingsley’s lips were on his lower back and his hands stroked his arse gently.
“You ready?” Kingsley whispered and Percy took a deep breath and nodded. Wanting to feel Kingsley inside him was a much more prevalent feeling over his fear.
He could feel Kingsley’s sticky smooth fingers prodding gently. Kingsley must have cast a Lubrication Spell, he realized with surprise. He supposed those spells existed and now that he had a need for them, he was determined to seek them out and learn them. They obviously were very useful. Kingsley slid in one finger, pulling it out and then pushing it in deeper, making Percy moan. His other hand was soothing Percy’s back and arse. A second finger soon joined the first one as Percy tried his best not to fight it.
After a few more gentle movements Kingsley’s arm came around Percy’s stomach and pulled him up on his knees, his arse elevated. Percy knew he had to relax and let it happen. Kingsley was slow and patient, for which Percy was eternally grateful. He rubbed Percy’s opening with the lubricant for a few more seconds before pressing the slick head of his cock to it. Kingsley pressed, slowly but firmly, and Percy yelped when the head slid in. He could feel his eyes tearing up. Kingsley was giving Percy all the time he needed to adjust, stroking him comfortingly.
“Relax.” Kingsley’s voice sounded kind but strained. Percy could only imagine the amount of self-control Kingsley had to exercise to go as slow and patiently as he did. “Try not to resist me. I can’t go any farther if you won’t let me.”
Percy took another slow breath and breathed out slowly as Kingsley pushed in deeper, making Percy moan loudly and clutch the covers. Kingsley reached under Percy and found his cock again, half-erect already, and started stroking it. It was a million times more sensitive as Percy threw back his head and gasped and allowed Kingsley to push in more.
“It’s almost in,” Kingsley whispered soothingly and pushed again.
Percy felt intense agony mixed with faint pleasure that grew more and more until it rivalled the shooting pain. He suddenly felt full and not as in control as he thought he was. He was gripped by steel fear at the prospect of doing what he felt he was about to do.
“I have to go to the –”
“No, no you don’t.” Kingsley leaned forward and pushed all the way in in one quick fluid movement, making Percy scream out and then kissing his shoulder and stroking his cock faster, taking Percy’s mind off the pain and allowing him to adjust. “It just feels that way. You’re ok. I’ve got you.”
Kingsley started sliding in and out slowly, matching the tempo with his hand, until Percy was gasping more from pleasure than pain, Kingsley’s cock hitting something inside him that made his own cock get harder and more sensitive with each stroke, if that was even possible.
Kingsley’s chest was pressed into Percy’s back and he was going faster now, though Percy knew that Kingsley didn’t lose control for a second. His hand was pumping more furiously as well, bringing Percy closer to his second orgasm of the night.
“Kingsley,” Percy hissed as he came again, violently, screaming out his name again and again, as if he couldn’t stop once he finally forced himself to say it. Hearing his name and screamed in that way pushed Kingsley over the edge and he came, shooting hot come inside Percy and groaning, continuing to pump his hips and progressively slowing down, finally collapsing on top of Percy, gasping.
They lay like that for a long time, it seemed, Kingsley soft inside him now, until he rolled off and flopped on his back beside Percy, his breathing still ragged and irregular.
“Percy?” Kingsley turned his face to meet a pair of intense blue eyes that seemed to be shining in the dark. “Are you ok? Did I hurt you?”
“A little.” Percy smiled, thinking to himself that after tonight he would never have reason or desire to lie to Kingsley again or dodge sensitive subjects. “It was... Incredible.” Slowly, Percy turned over and came to lie in the crook of Kingsley’s arm. They lay silent for a while until Percy asked, “May I still work for you?”
“No, you’re fired.” Kingsley laughed genuinely as Percy’s eyebrows shot up in shock. “I’m kidding, Percy, relax. Of course you may. I wouldn’t have you leave me now.”
Percy contemplated. “You know, I think you win, finally. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this relaxed in my life.”
“I told you, didn’t I?” Kingsley smiled. “You’ve found it already and just didn’t know it yet.”
“You made sure I found it.”
“Well, you were really taking your time. It took me weeks to get a confession out of you – I was sure you felt something when it came to me for a while now, you know, and when you finally did manage to say it, even if by accident, you ran away from me. I’m not as patient as most would think I am.”
It was Percy’s time to chuckle but then his eyes grew serious. “Did you mean it?”
“Hm?”
“When you said I was perfect the way I am?” Percy swallowed and blushed, remembering. “Even with my talking out of my arse, tripping over all the time I’m around you, and making a complete fool of myself non-stop?”
“You are very high-strung, Percy.” Kingsley sounded mischievous. “But I wouldn’t have you any either way. I think it’s just too much fun teaching you how to unwind.”
Percy nodded in agreement. Kingsley didn’t mind the way he was. He found himself not caring if his family tried to stage more “interventions” or make failed attempts to get him married off to nice girls. Perhaps he was too tense and perhaps he did work too hard, but he now had Kingsley to balance him out. It was more than enough. He could withstand his family’s tortures with that knowledge in mind. Besides, the looks on their faces when they found out would be revenge sweeter than honey.